


Off Limits

by AliceMalefoy



Category: SKAM (TV)
Genre: Brother-Sister Relationships, F/M, Sister AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-11
Updated: 2017-03-07
Packaged: 2018-09-16 21:31:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 22
Words: 52,173
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9290417
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AliceMalefoy/pseuds/AliceMalefoy
Summary: Mara Magnusson has always had everything she ever wanted in life, except for one thing. The boyish charm of her brother's childhood friend had wrecked her poor heart and ruined her for any other guy – you can trust her, she has tried. She could see the way he looked at her, though she knew there were rules about not hitting on your best friend's little sister. Luckily for her, there were no restrictions when it was the other way around.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> From now on I won’t be able to spend my entire days writing like I did with Play Me, so to make sure you won’t have to wait too long between each chapter I decided to write short chapters (yes, Yours Truly has finally decided to become a reasonable person) Enjoy this little foretaste!

Some things are simply not meant to be. Even when people maximized their chances by doing everything in their power to achieve their goal, it wasn't always enough. Like in this maddening scene in Titanic where Jack can't get on the floating door, and after everything he has gone through to be with Rose, he just dies. Well, maybe this was a little bit dramatic, chances are you won't die in real life, you will just be really, really frustrated because all your efforts are thrown into the trash. But she was drifting from the subject.

Somehow, Mara's brother had befriended the one guy who was simultaneously the absolute worst and the best thing that has ever happened to her. William and Chris were inseparable friends since- since always. As far as her memory goes, Chris has always been in their lives. He was like family to a certain extent – and that was precisely her problem.

Mara didn't want Chris to be family, Mara wanted Chris to wreck her body, to put it nicely. Not getting what she wanted was a foreign feeling for the only female Magnusson child. William and Nikolai had always been in competition and the weight of the entire family's future laid on their shoulders since they were kids. Mara had a form a freedom that her brothers would never truly grasp or experience, and that gave her power. Being the cherished only daughter of rich parents was a perk she appreciated too.

Therefore when she hit puberty and when he body morphed into a more womanly shape, drawing the attention of her male counterparts, she was already fully equipped to deal with this new found magnetism. Used to get what she wanted, familiar with her brother's way of life (was it weird for Mara to feel part of the Penetrators after assisting to so many of their meetings at her and William's place?) and not shy in the least, she embraced her new body and the benefits that came from it. Self-confidence was basically a birthright in the Magnusson family and blowing people away with their good looks was tradition. And like lightening, a Magnusson never stroke twice on the same spot, that is to say, they didn't do dating.

Another, more likely, explanation than the lightening theory was that both William and Mara had mad game when it came to everybody except the one person who mattered. For a while now the young girl watched her brother chase after a girl from her class, Noora, and she didn't know how to react at first. She knew Noora was a kind, smart and genuinely good person, and that made it even more unbelievable – that William of all people fell for someone who might actually be able to make him happy.

Mara, knowing better than to mind her brother's business, silently rooted for them, discretely spying of them from the corner of her eye whenever she could and trying not to give it all away when William dared mentioned Noora outside of school.

“The smile is betraying you,” someone said and plopped down next to Mara on the bench.

It was Christoffer – and his infamous, girl-swooning, heart-melting smirk that worked on everybody but Mara, who witnessed the very birth of 'Penetrator Chris'. He was sitting one leg each side of the bench, his back to William and Noora who tried and failed at being subtle at glancing toward each other from across the room. Mara had his full attention, but she kept her gaze locked on the paper on the table that she had to finish before next period.

“It would only betray me if they bothered to look my way but they can't even detach their eyes from each other,” Mara replied and shrugged, not even looking at Chris.

“Someone needs to tell them to just go for it. Everybody knows anyway,” Chris added.

He then grabbed Mara's papers so she would stop working and finally look up. The way her jaw clenched and her eyes narrowed gave away how annoyed she was at that, but he wasn't sorry in the least.

“I don't think that's true. Noora hasn't told her friends from what I've heard. Vilde is still constantly rambling about how dreamy William is!” Mara couldn't help the eye-roll that followed. 3

“Ouch,” Chris said, clasping his hand over his heart while still holding Mara's homework in the other, out of her reach. “Must be really shitty to not be good enough for your girlfriend to tell her friends about you.”

“They're not together!” Mara said before poking Chris' side and quickly stealing her papers back from him when he lowered his hand to cover his side. “Noora is being smart! I wouldn't tell anyone either if a notorious heart-breaker was suddenly running after me and I somehow returned the feelings.”

Chris put his elbow on the table and used his fist as support for his head while he thought about what Mara just said. He seemed to seriously ponder the issue. Mara had always disapproved of the Penetrators' ill treatment of girls while also knowing that her brother and his friends weren't fundamentally bad people. Her status of member by proxy of an exclusively male group of playboys with commitment issues set her apart from the rest of the girls. She often wondered if it wasn't unfortunate for her to be born female. Never filly accepted by the other groups of girls, she was too close to the Penetrators to be trusted, and yet she couldn't claim to belong to the boy's group either. As time flew by, Mara developed an immunity to loneliness. She liked her solitude, she grew independent and self-reliant. And above all, she cherish was few friends she had, and that included Chris.

“I can't find anything to argue with that,” Chris eventually declared. “But it's getting old seeing them drool over themselves like this. Although I've got to say Noora is holding herself together rather gracefully-”

“-a contrario to Will,” Mara finished in a sigh.

Both of them directed their gaze toward William, whose face was twisted in a fond smile only Mara had been the receptacle of until Noora came into his life. She wasn't mad in the least, she was happy for her brother, and glad some of his attention was on another person than her for once – it allowed her a little more freedom of movement.

“Look, I really have to finish this before class begins,” she then said, pointing to her half-finished homework. “So if you don't mind-”

She didn't finish her sentence but instead gestured Chris to walk away. It was a long shot, the guy literally never did anything he didn't want to or decide to do by himself. As expected, he didn't initiate any movement that would lead her to think he'd leave, instead he leaned over the table to get a closer look at her work.

“What is it? I'll help you if I can...” He suggested, earning a playful smile.

“Careful there, I might think you're finding excuses to spend time with me,” Mara teased him, her lips forming that mischievous smile that matched Chris' smirk.

That was the story of Mara's life. Chris and her flirted harmlessly with each other since they were fifteen, and no one ever said anything, not even William because he trusted them and knew it was just their way to communicate. Mara had no recollection of when exactly it lost its fun and harmless dimension and turned into passive-aggressive desperate pay-attention-to-me flirting.

There was no doubt that Chris would not take the first step, whether it was out of respect for William or because he was too stubborn to admit he actually had a fully-functioning heart, thus reducing his reputation of emotionally detached player to dust. The solution was simple really, there wasn't a thousand different ways to deal with this issue: Mara would have to take matters into her own hands.

So far she had never settled for anything in her life; when she wanted something she did everything in her power to obtain it, one way or another, and Christoffer Schistad was no exception to the rule. She was determined to not be the only one struggling to keep it together when he was around, that was unfair and no fun. From now on, Mara would make sure to be both Chris' worst nightmare and his greatest fantasy.

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

Chris' relationship with Mara had always been a complex one. No matter how hard he tried to convince himself that it would be better to simply consider her as his own little sister, he couldn't erase what attraction he felt toward his best friend's little sister. She was one year younger than them, but it's true what they say: girls mature quicker than boys.

He kept his distance when he could and played it off as the big brother kind of concern when he couldn't stay away from her. When her first boyfriend broke up with her and she came home crying to Chris and William playing video game. When she drank too much at a party and started getting touchy with strangers. Or when she was going out to a party and her dress was so short both he and William let out a sharp comment and told her to get changed – as if it was any of their business in the first place. The thing is, Chris' concern was justified most of the time, but the most significant difference between William's brotherly worry and Chris' unease upon seeing Mara dress like she was going on a man-hunt was the motivation behind it.

But lately, it was downright impossible for Chris to look in Mara's general direction without cringing. It was clearly not his place to intervene or even say anything about who she chose to hang out with, but he was seething. He had noticed the subtle changes in her overall appearance – how could he not – although Chris was pretty sure William was oblivious to that. He simply didn't look at her like a boy looks at a girl. Chris on the other hand...

Mara, Mara, _Mara_... what did she think about when she got dressed this morning? Clearly not her physics test, because these form fitting jeans and the shoulder-less sweater she was wearing weren't going to help her pass this subject. Did she think about Jakob? Whom she was currently laughing with at the other end of the corridor, her hand occasionally touching his arm – if that wasn't a good enough indicator that she was into him, what else was? Or maybe it was Stefan, who whistled at her when she walked by the other Penetrators this morning. She had shot him a smirk and walked away, not giving Chris the time of day.

“Hey,” one of the guys nudged Chris when he didn't answer then waved a hand before his opened eyes. “Where you at, man?”

“Mmh?” Chris hummed before shaking his head. “Nothing, just thinking,” he answered distractedly.

With that he shut his locker and turned away from Mara's seduction ritual. It really shouldn't bother him as much as it does that she doesn't wink at him on her way to her locker. It shouldn't bother him at all. They're _friends_. The very word tasted like iron on his tongue. When did it start carrying a negative connotation? He had always enjoyed hanging out with her, being her friend was his pleasure, really. Frankly she was one of the coolest persons he had met, and it didn't matter than she was William's little sister or that she was a girl, when they were kids, they constantly played together. When one of them was around, the other two weren't far behind. The years which passed have been accompanied by a growing distance between them, but never to the point where they'd lose touch. They just grew up. Mara sought out the company of other girls, Chris and William quickly become popular and soon both had a reputation to live by if they wanted to maintain their social status – that is, at the top of the food chain.

Mara was still a constant in Chris' life, but a less present one. She stood in the background of his life, and neither of them knew when her demotion from starring role to supporting character happened. This silent role didn't suit her. If he didn't know better, Chris would think she had finally grown tired of staying in the shadows when her place was in the spotlight, and now she was reclaiming her rightful position in their little group. Step by step, day after day, Mara wriggled her way into the Penetrators' closed circle. Chris knew her well enough to know that she didn't care if it meant crushing a few hearts – getting to the top had absolute precedence over everything else. Her little game of seduction carried on, and Jakob, Stefan and her new target Sven were all falling for it. Hard.

“Really?” Mara asked, laughing at something Sven had said.

Chris had heard her use that honeyed voice before. It was followed by a clear and purposely loud laughter that was anything but authentic. Obviously he was not that hilarious, and she must have run out of subjects to make small talk. A victorious smirk fought its way on Chris' lips but he repressed it. William was next to him, he was talking and Chris was supposed to listen. But his voice didn't reach him at all, like he was exclusively channeled to hear Mara's voice and nothing else.

“I would never have guessed!” She continued to giggle.

Sven's ego must have tripled in size since the beginning of their conversation. Mara kept on flattering him by rewarding his attempts at being funny by a roaring laughter. It had been going on for over a week now, and Chris was getting jaded. He had no clue what she was playing at, but any idiot – or maybe not _any_ – could perceive the uncomfortableness in her voice when she flirted with those boys. She wasn't interested in them, but she still publicly hit on them in a very vehement manner.

“Are you coming Chris?” William asked, the sound of Chris' name bringing him back to earth.

He had no idea what had been said during the last ten minutes, but he nodded and threw his hood over his head, following William out of the front door. His hearing seemed to come back to him once Mara was out of eavesdrop. It was getting ridiculous.

“Where are we going?” Chris eventually asked when the other boys dispersed and only he and William remained. His friend frowned and slowed down his pace to look at Chris in a confused and concerned kind of way.

“What is up with you lately? You haven't heard a word of what I said before, huh?” He asked, earning a dismissive shrug from Chris. “There's a party tonight at some second year girl's place. We need to go pick up some beer before tonight, and I need you to pick up Mara.”

“What?” Chris exclaimed then quickly tried to play it cool. “Why can't _you_ drive her? It's your sister,” he said in a casual what-a-chore tone.

“Since when does it bother you?” William asked, but he didn't wait for Chris to reply before he answered his question. “I'm going with Noora, I'd rather not have my little sister with me when I'm trying to seduce a girl.”

There was exactly zero argument against that. William made a pretty valid point and Chris had no excuse to refuse, because yeah, since when did he say no to spending a little quality time with Mara? She easily ranked as his second best friend, right behind her brother, and he knew it.

“Alright, alright, I'll get Mara,” Chris agreed since there was nothing else to do. “Pregame at my place?”

“Sure,” William said, shrugging to show that he didn't care where the pregame happened. It was just tradition, you didn't show up at a party completely sober. “Man you look out to lunch all the time these days, are you sure everything's alright? You don't look particularly thrilled about tonight.”

Did William really have to start noticing this kind of things now? There was a time when he was oblivious to everything that didn't concern him directly. Chris hated it back then but he wasn't completely sure that this was better.

“Peachy,” Chris snapped, not even bothering to shoot a smile along with his lie. “It's just a party, we have one every week, it's not worth getting super excited for.”

“You know you can tell me anything?” William asked, insisting that something was wrong with Chris.

Not anything, no, Chris thought. He couldn't tell his best friend that he had the hots for his little sister and certainly not that he was loosing his mind over how good she looked lately, and how he wanted to break the arms of all the boys she had seductively put her hands on these last two weeks. Chris couldn't confide in William about the impossibly strong pull he felt towards Mara, or about the fact that he had turned down several other girls because Mara was constantly on his mind. William would most likely think Chris was joking if he told him anyway – until he realized he was serious and then he would smash his skull on the pavement.

Well no, William wouldn't do that to Chris, though it would hurt significantly less than to lose William's friendship. Frankly, Chris was going to lose his wits over this dilemma.

“There's nothing to say,” Chris assured his friend. This time William seemed to believe him and they picked up their pace again to arrive at the liquor store before it closed.

 


	3. Chapter 3

People could say whatever they wanted about Chris, but he knew how to be a gentleman when he wanted or needed to. When he was courting someone, or when he was in presence of someone he appreciated and respected, he behaved properly. He had always treated Mara right, because she deserved it and also because William wouldn't permit Chris to treat Mara any less than like a princess.

But as of lately he was a little uneasy about the girl, she was up to something and his guts told him that he wouldn't like it. Since her stunt this morning in the hallway, Chris knew that the boys she was flirting with weren't an end, but means to an end. But Mara was a mystery to everyone even herself, she had a twisted mind and she was smart and cunning, she could be scheming for world domination for all he knew. Although he was quite certain world domination did not involve laughing at a guy's every joke so loudly everyone in her vicinity could hear how fake her laugh was. She wanted someone to hear her, or see her. She had a secret agenda and Chris tortured his mind with far-fetched theories about it.

It was why he didn't get out of his car and come to her door. He parked in front of her and William's building and waited there. He came right on time although he knew she was always ten minutes late. Not because she could never get ready on time, but just because she enjoyed letting him stew for a bit, most likely looking through the window and smirking to herself. That was who she was.

Chris was startled when he heard a knock on the car's window. Mara's face was on the other side, her breath steaming up the window.

“Hey!” She said, her voice barely audible.

Chris unlocked the door and gave a quick glance to the clock. It was 9:02pm, was her clock running ahead? She opened the door and sat down next to him, rubbing her hands together to warm them up. Her smile lit up the interior of the car in an eery way, or maybe it was just Christoffer who missed being at the other end of it.

“I haven't made you wait too long, have I?” She asked. “What's with that face you're making Chris, do I have something on my chin?”

Mara's hand covered her mouth, like she feared her lipstick smudged over her chin. Chris hadn't realized he was staring at her lips, but he shook his head and started the engine.

“You're perfect Mara,” Chris reassured her, wishing he could have said it in another way. But there really wasn't any other word to qualify her right now. “I just arrived, don't worry.”

“Ooh, you're awfully serious,” she noticed. “What happened?”

One thing that only Mara could accomplish was to simultaneously make fun of someone and show concern. She might tease the hell out of her friends, but she cared deeply about them and she was a good listener.

“What makes you think something happened? Maybe I'm just grumpy for no reason,” he shot back, feeling like punching himself for being such a grump with her. “Sorry,” he apologized. “It's complicated.”

“Is it a girl?” She asked. It was terribly cliché to associate 'complicated' with 'girls', but she was a girl herself and she shouldered her complexity.

“Yes,” Chris answered, gritting his teeth. He didn't mind sharing what was on his mind with her, except when she was the thing on his mind.

“Can I help?” Mara asked, turning down the volume of the music.

It took Chris a fair amount of time to ponder on the question, and it was only when the car came to a stop at a red light that Chris turned toward her and answered.

“You could. But I'm not asking you to, I'll figure it out myself. If I don't then-” he shrugged. “-it'll be my loss.”

“Or hers,” she pointed out, raising one of her neatly done eyebrows. She knew the devil was in the details, she lives by that rule.

“Can't we talk about something else? It's getting depressing,” Chris said, not answering to Mara's comment.

He wasn't sure if it would be her loss though, the girl truly had everything going for her, and Chris would consider himself lucky if she graced him with her attention. He wasn't talking about the friendly attention he already had from her. He wanted to be _more_.

“We can talk about anything you want Chris,” she simply replied. “I've never seen you so stern before a party, is it because William ditched you for Noora?”

Chris let a laugh that was tainted with bitterness.

“Heartbroken, yeah,” he replied. “I don't know what to do to get his attention anymore. What do you think, should I write him a poem? Serenade him?”

“Oh I bet he'd like that!” Mara laughed when she finally spotted a genuine smile on Chris' face. “You should definitely give it a try. At the break of dawn, right under his window.”

Both of them knew how much William hated getting up before ten.

“Are you trying to get me killed?” Chris asked in bewilderment. “I'm too handsome to die,” he objected.

“I can't disagree with that,” Mara said. “I'm sure you'll find a way to win him back. True love fins a way,” she assured him.

“Okay, can we just stop the romantic metaphors here? It's confusing the heck out of me,” Chris said in a more joyful tone then before. “What about your love affairs? Business seems to be going well these days.”

“Is that supposed to be insulting or did I miss something?” Mara's brows knitted together in confusion. “Why do you ask anyway, do you wanna be one?” She then asked just to tease him.

It worked. Chris was thoroughly dazzled and confused upon hearing her words.

“You see right through me,” he shot her back with a smirk. “Your friends are terrible flirts by the way, if I hear one more sexist joke I have to laugh at, I'll kill a man.”

“Nobody forces you to laugh at them. It'd be much more entertaining to watch you kick some ass than to see you coo with another Penetrator.”

“Been watching me, eh?” She bit her lip. “I'm not doing it out of pleasure, let me tell you...”

“Then why?” Chris had to ask since she didn't say anything more than that.

“I'm trying to elicit a reaction..”

She shrugged dismissively in a way that suggested that she didn't want to linger on the subject. Chris didn't care, he needed to know.

“Whose reaction?”

Mara kept silent a couple minutes and when they arrived, Chris thought he was not getting an answer after all. The music was already loud enough here, luckily for them the house was fairly isolated therefore the party shouldn't get busted by the cops.

A thousand different answers had crossed Mara's mind within the two minutes that passed between the moment Chris asked and the moment they reached the house. She couldn't decide. Mara always knew what she wanted to say, being hesitant was not one of her personality traits. But it did take her a certain amount of time to decide what to say to this. A split second decision cut the deal for her. She opened the door and before getting out and getting drunk, she said the words that would once again wreck Chris' world and put it upside down.

“Yours.”

 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've always sucked at cliffhangers but I think I'm getting the hang of it

Chris' head has started spinning long before he downed his first bottle of beer, or the second. He watched Mara walk around the house like she was the one hosting the party, handing beers to people, cheering and drinking with them, laughing with strangers that the alcohol cursing in her veins turned into momentary friends. She looked as joyful and careless as ever, no one would guess she just dropped the biggest bomb ever.

There was a certain lack of logic in his reasoning, but Chris figured that since his head was already a mess, the alcohol might do more good than bad, and maybe it would make him numb. Then it would hurt less to watch her go about like nothing at all happened, like she didn't just wreck his world and put him in a very bad place. Mara forced Chris to make a choice he has been postponing for far too long.

“Chris, man!” One of his friends called his name, barely audible over the loud music and Chris squinted his eyes to try and see who it was that was talking to him. “Over here!”

Chris finally saw someone waving at him to come over and he sneaked his way through the crowd, trying not to make contact wit the grinding couples. When he reached the group of boys, Chris greeted each of them with a tap on the back and a shoulder hug.

“Chris you look like you saw a ghost!” One of them felt the need to comment.

It earned him a shrug. Who cares? The neon blue and pink lights that kept flashing in the room made it nearly impossible to decipher anything anyway.

“And yet I still look better than any of you”, Chris shot back with his signature smile and the boy who made the comment received a few sympathetic pats on the shoulders from his friends after that burn.

He stayed with them for a while, not caring or noticing the time passing, or the people dancing behind them. Chris plopped down on the armrest of the couch, and a couple beers passed in his hands before the first troublesome thing happened. They were all roaring with laughter at something Chris showed them on his phone.

“Oh, jesus, look at that!” Some guy suddenly said when something behind Chris caught his eye.

He shoved Chris in the shoulder to get his attention and gestured him to turn around.

“That's some hot piece of ass right there!” Another one said, which was followed by another fit of laughter from the boys.

Mara stood not far from them, facing away from them. She was talking to two other girls from her year, one of them being Iben, Chris' ex. His stare must have been too insistent because she looked up and over Mara's shoulder and when her eyes caught Chris' she glared daggers at him before lightly touching Mara's shoulder and walking away. This had Mara wondering what upset her so she turned around only to see all the boys look at her like she was some kind of piece of meat. Not one girl would have taken all this attention from drooling boys like a compliment, it must have been terribly awkward for her, not to mention degrading. Yet she smiled softly before returning to her conversation. Chris knew the smile was for him now, the relief he felt in this exact moment was indescribable. He hadn't realized how much it ate away at him to see her smile like that to other boys.

“You might as well take a good look because that's all you'll get from her,” the only sober one said to his friends. “William's sister is off limits. Bros before hoes, you know the rule...”

A round of sighs and protests erupted from the group, but Chris wasn't listening anymore. Gone was the relief. Gone was everything. In one corner of the room stood William and Noora, gazing at each other like two lovesick puppies, unaware of their surroundings. In the opposite corner Mara danced with some girls, and some boys who not so subtly made their way toward her. Chris' blood boiled.

“If you think like this, the poor girl's never gonna get a boyfriend,” Chris pointed out rightly.

“Never prevented her from sleeping with anyone,” someone else commented.

“With who? Did any of you hit that?”

“Not me!”

“If I had I'd be a happy man!”

“But she's got a reputation! It's got to come from somewhere, right?”

“I heard she only sleeps with boys from other schools because of her brother,” sober guy said, and the others nodded thoughtfully, although none of them were in the right state to understand right now.

“He'd rather have her screw strangers than us?” One of the _brightest_ said.

Chris realized how bitter this whole conversation made him when he noticed that even his inner voice became sarcastic.

“I wouldn't let you touch my sister either, bro!”

Annoyed with the turn of the conversation, Chris set his beer on the coffee table and stood up. He needed to put distance between them and himself, or he would punch some teeth out before the end of the night. It wasn't even midnight and Chris already wanted to go home. But he had brought Mara and he would also give her a ride home when she would request it. Geez, how whipped was he?

“I knew something was wrong, you can never lie to me.”

Chris almost jumped when he heard the familiar voice. It was gentle, like a stroke from the hand, and she didn't need to speak too loud to be heard from him in this room. Most of the party happened in the living room, the kitchen was fairly quiet. Mara came up behind him soundlessly, taking him by surprise. Chris didn't expect her to follow him.

She looked fairly fresh for someone who has been drinking and dancing among sweaty people for a few hours now. Her eyes glimmered with mischief and a knowing smile adorned her lips.

“You genuinely didn't expect it, am I right?” She asked in a hushed tone, so the other people in the room couldn't hear them.

“Did I expect my best friend's sister to boldly tell me she was into me? Not really, no,” he said in a low but firm voice.

He wanted to be mad at her, but he was fundamentally incapable of that. What she did was like telling an alcoholic she had a fine bottle of whiskey in her bag.

“Does it bother you?” She then asked, still not showing any sign of self-doubt of gawkiness.

They might as well be talking about the weather or their homework. How could she remain so utter unaffected?

“I'm not blind, Chris, I see when a boy looks at me,” she added before he had a chance to pretend he was not interested and that she should never mention her attraction toward him again, for both their sakes.

“Mara, do you want me dead or something? William is going to skin me alive if he knows about that,” Chris suddenly burst, leaning in toward her to keep this conversation private.

“Don't be dramatic! If he knows about what? Nothing's happened... yet.”

Mara rolled her eyes and winked as she turned around. She left the kitchen in a swirl of sparkles and Chris felt like punching a hole in the nearest wall.

“Fuck!” Chris shouted, his fist slamming on the counter.

He swore a second time when his hand throbbed from the pain and brought it against his chest, cradling it to sooth the ache. The few people in the room jumped in surprise and looked at him as though he had a third eye in the middle of his forehead.

“What?!” He barked at them.

“Chris?” He heard William's voice ask in bedazzlement from the door frame. “Everything fine? What happened?”

“Nothing, nothing happened!”

Chris angrily shoved him aside and walked back into the living room to blend in the crowd. A girl pressed her body against Chris' chest on his way to the back of the room where all the drinks were set on a table. He pushed her away from him, which prompted an offended gasp and disbelieving glance. Penetrator Chris refused a hook up, call the paparazzi. He ignored her, as well as William who was following him closely.

“Chris! Chris wait!” William called him, his hand slamming on Chris' shoulder to make him stop. “What's going on? Why are you so upset?”

Chris could count on the fingers of one hand the number of times he lied to his best friend, but he didn't hesitate a second when William asked the one question he couldn't answer.

“Just- I ran into Iben earlier and it ruined the mood to have her glare at me,” Chris said and shrugged.

He saw the confusion and the suspicion in William's eyes because how could an unfortunate encounter with his ex girlfriend cause such a fit of anger. But Noora came into view and Chris raised his brows as if to say 'any more questions?' and William seemed to buy the dumb excuse Chris had made up.

After this minor incident Chris tried not to run into Mara, or Chris, or his friends or girls in general – actually he avoided everyone and simply stayed in a corner, going through old messages and pictures on his phone and switching beer for water. Clearly alcohol wasn't doing him any good and he still have to drive later that night.

And here it goes again – Mara plagued every last one of his thoughts. As if it wasn't enough already, she entered his view field. Chris could have dealt with that – he _thinks_ – but her attempt at walking through the crowd was disturbed by some guy suddenly grabbing her from behind and groping her. It was meant to be teasing, but he was obviously hammered and she wasn't receptive to his advances of poor taste.

Chris saw red and rushed forward before he could give it a second thought. Chris had endured two weeks of Mara hitting on several different guys – which he now knew was a scheme of hers to get his attention – and it might have been unpleasant but at least she was the one initiating it. This was downright gross and she wasn't enjoying it. He was familiar enough with the art of flirting to recognize the signs when a girl was into him and when she wasn't. Mara's twisted, embarrassed grimace and her attempts at freeing herself from this dude's grip wasn't enough for him to take the hint though, and Chris was just buzzed enough to attempt a reckless heroic gesture. Before Mara's horrified eyes, he punched the guy right in the face as he went to sneak a hand under her skirt. Suddenly the crowd dispersed and everyone stopped dancing to watch the two boys fight and Mara, standing there, her mouth covered with her hands.

 


	5. Chapter 5

It all happened in less than five minutes but it felt like an eternity to Mara who stood aside, doing nothing. She wanted to, but she knew better than to step between two boys fighting and she was so shocked that it took her a solid minute before realizing what was going on before her very eyes. She started screaming at them, demanding that they fucking stop, but it was hopeless, neither of them listened. Everyone in the entire house must hear her yells but Chris and the other boy were too caught up in their display of strength.

When the Penetrators finally intervened, they grabbed the rude guy who overstepped his boundaries with Mara and held him back. William wasn't there, he was nowhere to be found – he must have gone home with Noora. It was a blessing, because Chris would have been incapable of explaining his behavior to him. Protecting Mara from a handy rude fucker did not justify causing such a scene. Chris was about to dive in and resume beating the guy even though he could no longer return the punches, when Mara stepped in, placing herself right between Chris and his adversary.

“Chris!” She shouted, raising her hands. “Chris, stop! Stop!”

The panic in her eyes made him realize what he was doing and he stopped dead in his tracks, lowering his fist and settling down.

“Come with me,” Mara urged him, tugging on his sleeve. “Let's get out of here.”

She led them both through the many rooms of the house until they found one which was empty. It was the bathroom. At least one of the bathrooms, it was hard to tell, but this one was still clean and fairly far away from the party. She locked the door once they were inside and turned to Chris, looking ready to slap some sense in his thick head.

“What the hell were young thinking Chris?!” She began to shout, not feeling sorry for his sore face one bit. “That was awful! _Awful_!”

“He was all over you!” Chris shouted back, leaning over the sink and turning on the mirror lights. “That bastard was- he was groping your ass, and-”

“Yes I know he was, Chris! I was handling it, what bad could have happened to me in the middle of a room packed with people?!” Mara barked back, hitting Chris' chest to push him back.

“You're telling me I should've let him go on? Garb your ass, touch you like that?!”

“Like what, Chris? He was drunk and I was pushing him back!” She was so terribly mad that her cheeks were bright red and her eyes shooting lightnings. “I. Was. Handling. It,” she gritted through her teeth. It was still rather hostile but she was settling down.

“I know you can handle boys, Mara, but I couldn't handle it. It was too much to see him touch you like- touch you like-” Chris explained more calmly, apparently having trouble finding his words.

“Like what?” Mara asked again, short of breath because of the rush of adrenaline she received from this dreadful fight and all the yelling.

That, for once, was a question Chris felt like he could answer. Only a few hours ago, he wouldn't have be able to, but now that she told him that all that staging was aimed at making him jealous, he could say it. He was jealous. He had never been great at sharing his toys – and heaven forbids he ever considers Mara like a toy, but she was his own nonetheless.

“Like I want to,” he eventually muttered, rather sheepishly. Like a little boy who admitted having a crush on his school mistress.

Mara didn't try to hide her smile. The corners of her mouth twitched upward and she broke into a wide grin which betrayed how eager she had been to hear these words.

“Do you have the slightest idea how unbearable it was to see you flirt with every boy in the school these last weeks? It fucking killed me, Mara! Why did you try to make me jealous if you already knew how I felt?!”

“I don't know how you feel Chris,” Mara replied in a soft voice. “I can tell you desire me, but that's not a feeling exclusively directed at me, right?”

She had seen Chris' little stunts at every party they both went to. He couldn't deny it, he couldn't pretend to be an angel, actually he wouldn't even consider himself a good person.

“Besides, you're worrying about William, and if I wanted you to act on your feelings – now that I know you _have_ feelings for me – I needed to corner you. Sorry about that,” Mara apologized, cringing at bit at how heartless it sounded when said out loud.

“By the way, you're lucky William wasn't there anymore, or he would've kicked you ass for causing a scene,” she pointed out.

“Or maybe he would have helped me kick _his_ ass for behaving like a douche with his beloved sister,” Chris suggested, earning a nod and a 'eh maybe' from Mara.

“That's not the point,” she said, pushing that thought aside with a little wave of the hand. “It was a bad idea to start this fight. And I don't want you to get hurt because of me.”

“I don't care about getting hurt,” Chris said, his voice a bit harsh but still laced with fondness.

He walked forward until Mara's back hit the bathroom wall and she stopped breathing when she felt his body press up against her chest. This was the closest she had ever been to him, it was what she craved and now it was happening. His breath was warm against her cheek and Chris smirked down at Mara who had trouble keeping it together. What sane girl would keep her shit together when a guy as devastatingly handsome as Chris smirked at her? The answer is none. And it was backed by the endless list of girls on Chris' tally.

“I care about every guy in Oslo knowing they shouldn't approach you or they'll have to deal with me,” Chris said with a voice made raspy by desire.

“You don't mean it,” Mara replied. Her mischievous smile almost made Chris lose his bearings. “Just so you know, I will give in – that's what I wanted after all – but I know you won't tell _anyone_.”

It pained him to admit it, but she was right. He hated it, but it was how things were and he couldn't change them just because he liked the girl. Liking the girl was never enough in real life, this shit only worked in rom-coms, and even there it wasn't a walk in the park.

“Why would you want this then? What's in it for you?” Chris asked in confusion.

Mara was proud and loud, she was no side hoe that Chris could come to when he felt like it and never showed to the outside world. He wanted to date Mara. He wanted to sit next to her – sometimes – at school, and vent about the guys and the burden of the reputation of lady killer he has to uphold. He wanted to do exactly what they were already doing but tenfold. It wasn't that fucking hard to understand, he _really_ liked her.

And when he asked that dumb question, she shot him a sad but sweet smile, and Chris thought he might have touched a nerve.

“For me? Well, you, obviously. I want you, Chris,” she answered. “And I know you'll argue that William won't let us be, and that you don't want to risk your friendship.”

“You've thought of everything ahead?” He asked in half puzzlement half admiration. “If you already knew I was going to say no, why bother tricking me into admitting I like you?”

“You say no to publicly dating me,” Mara said, highlighting the issue. “Plus the whole 'bros before hoes'-” she air-quoted this, “-prevents you from betraying William. Don't think I don't know about his rule about 'no dating Mara'!”

“I won't make you my secret, Mara,” Chris protested as soon as he realized where this was going.

He should have guessed sooner. That was what she was up to. She planned to date her brother's best friend behind his back. But it was hardly feasible, the three of them where always hanging out together, William was bound to notice.

“Of course not!” Mara scoffed at how ridiculous the idea was. “I never understood why the concept of dating someone secretly was so male-centric. The guy's just dating secretly, but the girl's a side hoe – not as opposed to main hoe but rather a hoe you're only doing on the side, you know?”

“Stop using that word, geez!” Chris made a face out of distaste for it.

“What I'm saying is that I know you won't treat me like this Chris. That's what I like so much about you – among other things. But let's turn it around. You will be my dirty little secret. And since I put you in this situation, I take full responsibi-”

Chris couldn't listen to her talk about this with her down-to-business voice any longer. There was no way known to man to make Mara do something she didn't want to – like shut up for example – so he did the first thing that came to mind: he kissed her. Actually, this had been on his mind for a very long time now, and he couldn't believe he had let himself be dragged into this conversation without first stealing a kiss or two. Chris was an experiences thief, he could tiptoe inside a girl's heart, steal what he wanted and leave before she knew he was there. Mara though, gave him everything he needed – wanted – willingly.

She caved in and her body crashed against Chris' like a wave against the chore, inevitably and in such a manner that she fit perfectly against him. Mara melted in the embrace and returned the ardor he put in the kiss, twice as much actually. An overwhelming feeling of victorious washed over them both, and for once, there was no loser. Nothing about this kiss was chaste, it was an eager, long awaited, needy, open-mouthed kiss, and neither of them felt apologetic for the way they haphazardly tugged at each other clothes like two virgins who struggled and fumbled to rid each other of the useless material between them.

“You talk way too much,” Chris laughed between two kisses.

Somehow, they ended up in the bathtub, Chris being the one on top, his hands trailing up Mara's legs and thighs. He had to bite down on his lip to repress a groan, he had waited _so_ damn long to touch her here, and here, and _here_. When his fingers reached her underwear, he hooked them under the waistband and hurriedly slid them down her legs, throwing them aside. Mara's gaze didn't waver and was locked on his as he began to lean down, teasingly slowly. And for the first time, Chris gave head to a girl. And it was Mara, which made it perfect. Iben had always been shy about it, and the others didn't even count.

Neither of them had the slightest idea of ho late it was, if people could hear them, if someone tried to find them, or to enter the bathroom since they locked themselves inside. Chris watched Mara unravel before his eyes and when she regained her breath, he helped her get up and out of the tub.

“If that's how you make me stop talking, please be my guest and do it again,” Mara laughed, receiving a stunning smile in return. “And don't tell me that this was just a one time thing and you can't risk losing William over me, or I'll smash you pretty face against the sink.”

The threat seemed unnecessarily dramatic, but if Chris really did eat her out as a sort of outlet for the piled up desire he had for her, Mara was going to carry it out.

“I wouldn't think of it,” Chris snickered and put his hands on her waist, pulling her toward him. “I'm your side hoe,” he stated in the most casual way.

Then Mara kissed him again, to seal the deal and also because she fucking wanted to.

 


	6. Chapter 6

A pleasant routine quickly settled between them and time flew by without either of them noticing. Mara, contrary to popular belief, was the reckless one, but also the more collected one. She knew her brother and his way of thinking better than anyone, and while Chris tried to avoid her at all costs when William was around, she knew better. It would sooner raised his suspicions that Chris suddenly put extraordinary effort into avoiding his other best friend, than if he downright flirted with her. That's what they have always done up to this moment, that was how they communicated: with furtive glances, faint smiles, slight nudges and eloquent silences only they could understand. Sometimes William felt out of place when he stood between Mara and Chris who seemed to have development an entirely new language they were the only ones to speak.

Paradoxically, this came to an abrupt stop as soon as Chris began to see Mara behind William's back. The paranoia and fear of getting caught red hand made him behave abnormally and it became obvious. Chris was a good liar most of the time, but this was the first time he had to put such effort into keeping something from his long time best friend, on such a long period of time. Mara had to compensate for his lack of flirting when he grew too distant. She had to continuously remind him to just be himself and not act any different from before, at least for the first three weeks of their secret affair.

Whenever William left the apartment to go out with Noora or spent the night out, Chris came over, and these were the best of times. He could ring the doorbell without feeling his heartbeat accelerate because _what if William notices_? Mara always opens the door, and she's not dressed up, her hair isn't done and she doesn't wear heels, and Chris loves it. He can pick her up and they kiss for so long the automatic light in the hallway turns off, and when that happens it's their cue to walk back to her room, and they can finally do what every other couple does.

They talk, they laugh, they put on a movie that they don't pay attention to and they kiss and have sex until they eventually fall asleep.

Chris always leaves so early... Mara knows it's a necessary precaution, but it's also a heartfelt disappointment, especially when it turns out that William doesn't show up before noon and Chris could have stayed longer.

The rest of the time, they acted normal. Chris got over his initial constant vigilance and was back to his casual flirty comments addressed to Mara, which William either ignored or didn't mind.

“Door's open!” Chris heard William shout from inside the apartment.

He frowned then shrugged and walked in. He knew the place like he lived here anyway. Chris kicked off his shoes and right as he turned around he came face to face with a wet William, only clad with a towel around the hips.

“Ah geez, are you trying to blind me? If a half naked Magnusson is going to open the door please let it be Mara!” Chris snickered playfully, which made William squint his eyes and flip him. “We're late already!” He pointed out.

“I know, I was at Noora's and I didn't wake up, it's too late for first period now,” William shrugged and walked back to his room. “We can take our time and just go to the next class!”

Chris didn't have any objections to that, it's not like he _needed_ to know Spanish.

“It shouldn't take too long, just go see Mara while I'm getting ready,” William told him before closing the door to his room.

This was an opportunity Chris couldn't pass up, William pushed him right in her arms although he hadn't even planned on seeing her this morning, he just came to pick up William because his car was in the garage after the Yakuza did a number on it.

“Knock, knock,” Chris said, causing Mara's head to raised from the book she had her nose dived in.

He stayed in her door frame although it was wide open. She too came out of the shower, her wet hair was braided so it wouldn't fall in front of her eyes while she was reading, sat at her desk chair, with her feet on the desk.

“Hey hot stuff,” she said as a greeting as she slightly spun on her chair to face him. “Come on in!”

“What are you doing here?” Chris asked, strutting in, hands in his pockets and looking around like he wasn't hanging out exactly here two days ago.

“It's my room,” she replied in a giggle.

Chris' eye-roll was sufficient to make her answer seriously.

“I have gym this morning. I don't like gym. And I wanted to finish this book,” Mara explained while shaking her hand to show the book. Chris took it from her, causing her to protest verbally but still not move from her chair.

“ _The Dressmaker,_ ” he read the title out loud and then proceeded to read the synopsis on the back. He always did that, even though he wasn't into reading, he always wanted to know what Mara liked so much about her books. “Erh, too girly for me!” He decided before putting in on the desk.

“Hey!” Mara shoved Chris and took her book back. “First of all, what's wrong with girly things? Second of all, it's not even what you think. It's about revenge and karma coming back around to fuck people over.”

“Now that's a much better catch phrase than what I just read, they should write that on the back cover!” He declared, smirking and leaning against the desk right next to her. “Are you coming with us for next period?” He asked.

“Nah, I'm just gonna stay here this morning. I'll go this afternoon,” Mara simply answered, not feeling like going to school today.

She knew that wasn't how the world functioned, she couldn't just not leave her room whenever she felt like having a lazy day, but she was also hellbent on enjoying this kind of liberty while it lasted. High School wasn't that demanding in matter of personal work and investment.

“You know it's not a good sign when I'm the one being assiduous?” Chris asked before leaning down and kissing her. It was always the best part of the day: kissing Mara. All the more when he expected to spend the day without getting any private moment with her.

“The door's wide open and William could walk in, you know that?” Mara asked as she pulled back just enough to talk. Chris smirked as only answer and kissed her again, lightly, quickly. It was as if she had dreamed it.

“Who do you think he'd kill first if he caught us?” Chris wondered out loud.

“Me if he has any mercy,” Mara huffed, her hand finding Chris' and her fingers tracing loops around this knuckles. “I'd rather not have you being murdered before my eyes be the last thing I see.”

“And I do?” Chris asked in bewilderment, pointing at himself. He tried to stay serious but a wide grin appeared on his face as soon as the words left his mouth.

“Methinks I'll be too dead to care,” Mara snickered back along with a click of the tongue. Ensued Mara and Chris' usual banter until William's head popped through the door, looking as though he had just seen a dog walk on his forelegs.

“I'm ready,” he said, making them stop talking and turn to him. “Am I interrupting something?”

The second the words were out there, Mara noticed how stiff Chris had become, so she spoke up before William saw it.

“Chris is criticizing my taste in books again!” She said, sticking out her lower lip and making puppy dog eyes to her big brother.

“Don't listen to him,” William laughed as Chris walked out of the room, not without one last smirk and wink over his shoulder. When he was out the door, William whispered to Mara, “I'm not even sure he can read.”

“I heard that!” Chris shouted from the hallway.

Yeah, they weren't doing so bad. They stole kisses from each other every chance they had, their eyes lingered a few seconds too long on each other, they sat slightly closer than they used to, but nothing too blatant, nothing alarmingly suspicious. Most of the time, it was the same as before because they had always been in each other lives, they had been there for each other through thick and thin for the longest time. Heck, some people even believed they were together until William made it clear that 'no Penetrator shall date Mara' was the cardinal rule. Mara understood Chris' way of thinking, and Chris could always tell the difference between what Mara said and what she meant. The intimacy was the only real change, because there was no getting closer than they already were on a spiritual level.

For a frighteningly long and clairvoyant second, Mara thought that maybe – just _maybe_ – Chris and her had virtually been in a relationship for longer than either of them thought.

 


	7. Chapter 7

The honeymoon phase. That's what they called it. Mara agreed on the choice of words.

 

Mara sighed against her bedsheets, loving the contact of the material against her skin and thriving in the peace of mind that brought a Saturday morning, when she didn't have to get up at the crack of dawn to go to class. She rolled around to change position, but her arm didn't hit the mattress. The usually empty spot next to her was not, in fact, empty. Somewhere in the back of her mind, still deliciously numb from sleepiness, the thought that this was the best wake up she ever had appeared. She didn't say it out loud, but she knew she could get used to this.

“Chris?” She uttered, keeping her eyes close as she nuzzled him.

“Why, are you bedding other boys?” He laughed softly. He too wasn't fully awake, but it didn't matter.

“You stayed,” Mara mumbled in her sleepy voice, her eyes still not opening.

It wasn't a question and didn't call for an answer, therefore Chris stayed quiet. He merely wrapped an arm around her figure to cuddle her and kissed her forehead.

“Your brother's home,” Chris informed her.

This time she snapped her eyes open. Mara was about to start panicking and ask _why how when what_ when she realized that she couldn't find it in herself to give two shits. Maybe later, when she would be properly awake.

“I heard him slam the front door this night,” Chris explained. “'was too comfy to sneak out,” he added before snuggling closer to her.

William always spent his Friday nights either partying – in which case Mara and Chris partied too – or at Noora's. They must have gotten into a fight.

“Don't worry, he won't barge in uninvited,” Mara reassured Chris. “Especially not on a Saturday morning before noon. He's learned not to do that the tough way.”

“I'll ask for the whole story later,” Chris mumbled in his state of semi-sleep.

His hair was all over the place and he looked tired even after a night of sleep. With her only free hand, Mara carefully brushed his hair out of his face and stroked his cheek and the outline of his jaw until she saw the faint twist on his mouth, signaling that he was trying not to smile.

“Why were you awake in the middle of the night anyway?”

“I wasn't, your inconsiderate brother woke me up! I can't fall back asleep once I'm awake,” Chris groaned and grabbed Mara's hand, only to kiss it and place it on his chest.

“You're such a grump when you're tired,” Mara told him. “We're stuck here until he leaves, so you might want to try and get some more sleep anyway.”

“Mmh, awful. Don't know how I'll survive to a lazy morning with my girlfriend,” Chris replied in this mock-dramatic tone that made Mara want to roll her eyes so far back in her head she'd see behind her back.

“Also, we'll have to shower together, William will think it's weird that I take two showers in a row.”

“I should stay here every week-end,” Chris thought out loud, earning a frank chuckle.

Today was the closest William got to discovering their secret in two months.

 

*

 

The next incident wasn't nearly as easy to fix than the first one. Chris had simply waited until William locked himself in the bathroom to tiptoe out of the apartment, and that was the end of it. But this time, it was a close call. Not too close for comfort, but still, a little bit too close for their peace of mind. It was once again due to William unexpectedly barging home while Chris was over.

They had tried to do it the other way around and have Mara come over to Chris' house, but she didn't own a car so he would have to come and pick her up, and she reasonably couldn't tell William that she was 'spending the night at a friend's place' every week-end, especially since she barely had any female friends and she was a rather stay-at-home person.

It happened on a Sunday night, a little before dark.

“Mara!” William's voice called her as she and Chris heard the front door slam shut.

They looked at each other in panic, then down at the obvious lack of clothing covering their bodies. Chris as being pressed into the mattress by Mara, and luckily for them, they hadn't gotten past the clothes removal yet. With only their underwear and flushed cheeks, they still looked guilty as all hell. A low “shit!” escaped them both at the same time before they jumped off the bed. Mara did her best to arrange and smooth out the sheets to make it look like she wasn't not having sex in it, meanwhile Chris gathered his belongings, that included his clothes, his phone, his backpack, everything that would hint that he was in Mara's room recently.

“I thought he wasn't supposed to come home tonight!” Chris whispered frustratingly.

“He wasn't!” Mara replied, messily shoving her clothes in the laundry basket.

Chris pointed toward the bathroom door, silently asking if they should hide in there, but Mara shook her head and gestured him to come over to her.

“In here!” She said, gesturing to her closet.

Chris threw his stuff inside before she hopped in, her foot immediately sliding on something. Mara was lying on the floor and had to swallow down a complain when her back hit something sharp.

“Wait! Your phone!” Chris exclaimed under his breath.

He grabbed Mara's phone, which was on her bedside table, and then joined her, having no choice but to join her on the floor in order to not step on her. A millisecond after he closed the closet's door, William opened the door to Mara's room. He merely peeked inside.

“Mara?” He asked again, looking around. “Are you here?”

When it was clear that she wasn't going to answer he opened the door wider and walked in. Chris and Mara held their breath for dear of betraying their presence. They couldn't make the slightest noise, or they'd be fucked. In the rush of it all, they chose to hide their clothes instead of getting dressed and pretend Chris was just there to hang out – which, now that they thought about it, was not that stupid an excuse. Chris' clothes carpeted the floor and forms a cushion-y surface for Mara's back. To make it less uncomfortable for them both, Mara spread her legs and allowed Chris to lay on her, in this weirdly sexual position, despite the awkwardness of the situation they found themselves in. Honestly, if the situation permitted it, they would be laughing at how ridiculous they must look. Mara had to bury her face in Chris' neck in order not to muffle what little noise might accidentally come out of her mouth.

William lazily strolled through her room, as if he was in a museum and looked at strange art pieces. He took a book in his hand, put it back, then grabbed a pen, or a notebook, or even a makeup brush and examined it closely. Chris was the only one to see through the shutters of the closet's door, but if he told her her brother was going through her stuff she would no doubt be mad. After a couple minutes that felt like two years, he walked out.

“He's out,” Chris said after another minute, just to be sure he was far enough not to hear them speak. “Give me your phone!” He then ordered Mara.

She was cradling her phone against her chest but hastily handed him upon hearing the urgency in his voice. Seconds after Chris put it on silent, there was an incoming call. Mara sighed in relief, letting her head hit the back of the closet and stifling a groan. That was one good point for Chris, she didn't think of turning off her phone in case William called. It would doubtlessly raise suspicions if the ring-tone suddenly emitting from her closet.

“Answer!” Chris urged her, using his authoritative voice she knew meant he was being serious.

“What am I supposed to say?” She still asked in panic, her eyes going wide.

“I don't know, just make something up, but you need to answer!”

“Hi?” Mara said into the speaker as she picked up.

She whispered. Had she screwed this up already? Maybe. She shot fiery glares at her barely-secret-boyfriend while he smiled innocently.

“ _Mara? Where are you? Why are you whispering_?” William asked, his voice sounding louder than Mara's, even though it came out of the phone.

“I- eh I'm at the cinema,” she said, and Chris nodded in agreement, signaling her she was doing great. “I can't really talk right now.”

“ _Oh okay_ ,” William said. “ _Will you be home for dinner_?”

Chris was already nodding before Mara had the time to give Chris her questioning look.

“Yes.”

“ _Cool. I'll get us sushi, this way dinner won't get cold if you run late_.”

“From that place I like?” Mara asked.

It was worth a try. Her favorite sushi restaurant was on the other side of the city.

“ _It's a twenty minutes walk to go there_!” William complained, but he caved in after a soft 'pretty please', and Mara smirked to herself.

“Thank you,” she cooed into her phone.

She heard a grumble and then William hung up. As soon as the call was over, Mara relaxed, only then realizing how tense she had been during the whole duration of it. Chris was smiling. Of course he was smiling, he had every reason to smile, he was laying between the warm thighs of his barely clad girlfriend, using her as a pillow, while she counted the seconds until she could crawl out of there and stretch her back.

“You were perfect,” he uttered against her skin as he placed a kiss on her throat and then proceeded to kiss his way up to her lips, hoping to distract her from the visibly hurtful position they were in.

Another five minutes passed before they heard the now familiar slam of the front door and cried in delight as they exited the enclosed space and stretched their limbs. Chris was about to grab his clothes and make a quick leave but Mara stepped between him and the closet, her fists resting on her hips – a position which never announced anything good.

“Where do you think you're going?” She asked, giving him an amused but stern look.

“Out, while I still can,” Chris said, picking her up in his arms to move her out of his way.

But Mara wrapped her legs around him and placed her hands on his shoulders.

“I just sent William to the farthest sushi shop I know, which means we have at least forty minutes before he returns.”

“Make it thirty, just be to safe,” Chris said, easily giving in and hooking his hands under her thighs.

“It's plenty of time to finish what we started,” Mara uttered tentatively.

She was doing that thing with her eyes, the thing where she batted her eyelashes, let her eyelids droop just a little bit, then she bit her lip and Chris was a goner.

 


	8. Chapter 8

By the time William came back with dinner, Mara had showered, dried her hair, changed into something she wold have worn if she had actually been to the cinema, and watched three times the trailer of a movie that played today. She was covered, no matter what. The only sign of her extra-curricular activities was the hickey on her collarbone, but she fixed this problem with a turtle neck.

William looked like he was seriously questioning if Mara was worth the whole trip downtown just to buy sushi, but then she smiled and brought the plates and the drinks to the living room, while he slouched down on the couch, seemingly exhausted.

“Next time you go buy 'em,” he grumbled before gulping down the whole glass of water and pouring himself another one.

“We'll see about that,” she laughed, taking her menu out of the plastic bag.

Once a week – or more – Mara and William ate dinner together, though most of the time they hung out with different people or William was with a girl, or they skipped dinner because they had a lot of work or fell asleep. They settled in front of the TV, which was turned on but being thoroughly ignored, the voice of the anchor man was drowned by their own conversation. They were laughing about something Elias did to get a girl's attention, when Mara thought it was the moment to her the question that bugged her.

“Hey,” she started, immediately earning Will's undivided attention. “I've been meaning to ask you something.”

“What is it?” He asked, struggling to grab a sushi with his chopsticks.

He really sucked at eating with those, but he refused to use a fork because Mara aced at using chopsticks and he always said he would one day be better than her. But it was drifting from the subject.

“Why do you not allow any of your friends to date me?” She eventually asked, distractedly playing with her chopsticks.

It itched her to reach forward and help William hold his properly. But he stopped eating and stared at her. She had never asked this question before, she had never questioned this interdiction because she never thought Chris was interested in her until a few months ago. It would have been a legitimate question, though, and the most surprising part was that it took her so long to ask it. William was so adamant on keeping her away from the other Penetrators that she had to wonder why.

“Are they this terrible?” She asked when the silence became increasingly long.

“They are,” William immediately replied, giving her a pointed look. “You should know, you've met all of them. Not one is good enough for you.”

“You're not my chaperone, Will,” Mara reminded him graciously.

He never was an overbearing brother, but sometimes he still felt like he should shield her from whatever threat he sensed. In all the years they spent living alone together, Mara never felt the need to remind William not to act like he was her father instead of her big brother of only one year.

“And you don't even care about the others, it's just the Penetrators,” she pointed out.

“If a guy I don't know breaks your heart then he's an asshole and I'll break his face, but if one of my friends breaks your heart, it'll be my responsibility, I'll feel guilty for not opposing to it.”

“What?!” Mara chocked out, half laughing half offended. Her plate California rolls almost slipped off her lap. “You selfish bastard! You're only doing this to spare your feelings?!”

They were both laughing wholeheartedly though Mara was genuinely shocked and would get back at Will later for that. What an ass. They resumed dining, still paying little to no attention at all to the NRK news. After a few minutes during which Mara recovered from this revelation, they continued chatting about anything and everything, but at some point, Mara's face turned stern again, and William knew that the earlier subject was not over.

“Not one of them?” She said, her voice unsure. Her brows knitted together in what William could only call contrariety, but in such a graceful manner that she appeared more scared than mad.

“Mh?” Will hummed in confusion.

“You don't think _any_ of your friends is good enough for me? Not even one?” She clarified her question, but William was still in the dark as to what he was supposed to answer to that.

No one was good enough for his little sister. But that was not what she wanted to hear. Here, that was a good question: what did Mara want to hear? Why so many questions tonight?

“None,” he eventually said. It was a short but final.

The tone of his voice suggested that he no longer wanted to hear about this, so Mara took the hint and went back to eating in silence. To her surprise, William added something else before imitating her and finishing his plate.

“But it's not like you're interested in any of them, right?”

Mara shook her head, because somehow, it was too difficult for her to deny it out loud. Chris wasn't here, but she felt like it would be unfair if she declared not to like anyone when she was head over heels for Chris. Not that she has ever told him that. Mara just wasn't good at saying certain thing out loud.

“Good,” William sighed in relief. “You'd be wasting your time, trust me. For a wile I thought you were into Chris.”

The air was knocked out of her lungs. It was fortunate that she didn't have any food in her mouth because Mara would have choked on it or swallowed it whole. William wasn't looking at her when her pupil widened.

“What? _Why_?” She questioned dumbly. She sounded guiltier than she would have liked.

“Remember that party we hosted last year?” Will asked.

At the words 'last year', Mara breathed again. He wasn't suspecting anything.

“Yeah?”

“You drank too much and fell asleep halfway through,” William reminded her. Not her best performance. “And when everyone left and I was putting away the empty bottles, I heard you say Chris' name in your sleep. And you had been weirdly clingy with him a little before that. Anyway, I thought you were pining after him.”

“I wasn't being _clingy_ ,” Mara gasped in offense. “And so what if I hung out with him a little more than usual? Did you automatically deduce I liked him?”

“Why else would be dream about him?” William asked, his brows shooting so far up they disappeared under his fringe.

“I don't know, there are plenty of reasons! You guest star some of dreams too, I dream about people I know, it's not like I have a saying about it.”

“That's weird!”

“No, it's not!”

“Well then why do I never dream about you?” He asked, as if he was making a point.

“Because you're too busy having wet dreams about Noora, what do I know?” Mara shrugged, and Will's jaw hit the floor.

“Take it back!”

“Never!”

“No wonder I never dream about you, you can be such an annoying munchkin!”

“You're hurting all three of my feelings, brother,” Mara said, not bothered in the slightest about being called short.

There comes a time in life when a girls has to accept that the final growing spur will not come and make her a model. But just push a little more on William's buttons, she leaned forward and reached over his plate, and in a swift, skillful move, Mara stole William's last salmon sashimi as payback for 'hurting her three feelings'.

“Hey!” He exclaimed in indignation. “You fucking sushi thief! Give it back!”

He jumped from his place but it was too late, Mara put it in her mouth and began chewing and even licked her chopsticks, going as far as to make an obscene grunt of satisfaction.

“I was keeping the best for last!” William complained.

“Well if it's any comfort, you were right, it was delicious.”

 


	9. Chapter 9

“I almost miss seeing them eye-fuck at this point,” Chris complained before sitting down next to Mara at the school library.

The old lady sitting at the front desk glared at him from under her glasses, and Chris gave her an apologetic smile.

“Will and Noora?” Mara asked in a hushed tone, closing her book and looking at him.

Barely anyone ever came to the library when it wasn't exam period, but they remained cautious and tried not to show there was anything more than friendship between them. Though Chris couldn't hold back from gently lifting Mara's chin with two fingers, enjoying the short contact while it lasted.

“Who else? Will just shut a door to my face to make out with Noora in an empty classroom. Not to brag or anything, but we're much better at keeping our relationship a secret than they are,” he answered, whispering this time.

“That's because he doesn't try to hide it from you,” Mara said matter-of-factly. “Don't you ever want to tell him? Sometimes I forget why we're hiding in the first place.”

“Because you're off limits and I broke the cardinal rule of friendship by going for my best friend's little sister, and also I'm too pretty to be forever disfigured by your brother,” Chris listed all the reasons why it would be a terrible idea to come clean to William.

“Just wear a helmet,” Mara replied in a sarcastic tone. “We've been sneaking in and out and lying to everyone for almost four months now.”

“I know...” Chris sighed in defeat.

As much as he would like to joke about it, he too was getting tired of constantly having to watch over his shoulder and lie to his friends. Especially about Mara. For the first time in his life he was dating a girl he actually wanted to be seen with, and by a sick twist of fate, he wasn't allowed to.

“Let's not think about it,” Mara decided for them both. “Russ time is coming, have you received your russebukse1 yet?”

“Last week yeah. I'll send you a picture,” he said with a wink. “I'll be wearing this and nothing else.”

“It's a relief to know that you'll always be true to yourself, Chris,” Mara laughed fondly before remembering they had to keep quiet. “Will you stop by tonight?”

“I have to do something with the boys first but sure,” he seemed to think about how long it'll take him. “I'll always make time for you.”

Mara's heart jumped in her chest but she tried not to let it show through her expression. It was the closest thing Chris had ever said to actually voicing his feelings for her. She wasn't one for openly displaying her feelings and she didn't like it when her partner did it either. Never in her wildest dreams did she think Chris was the kind of person to talk about sentiments, but whenever he said something sweet, it stirred something within her.

“I want to kiss you so bad right now,” she admitted as she concealed a bitten laugh. She shouldn't have to hold back from kissing her own boyfriend.

“Why don't you?” He asked, leaning over the table and smiling seductively, one of his eyebrows raised in question.

“You know why,” Mara said. “And because the old lady is staring at us, I bet she's just waiting for something like that to happen, it'll give her a reason to yell at us.”

“William and Noora do it all the time, why should we behave at school if they don't?” Chris asked, making a very good point.

“Wanna get naughty with me in a dark corner?” Mara smirked leaning a little closer toward Chris.

If anyone else than the librarian were watching them, they'd see right away that these two were together. But no one was there except a girl at the far of the room, her nose dived in her book.

“Fuck yes,” Chris admitted, vehemently showing his frustration because he couldn't do so as he pleased. “And you know what else I want to do? I want to take you out.”

Mara practically snorted – not out of disdain, rather out of sheer surprise and disbelief.

“Like a date?”

“Exactly. A date.” Chris nodded and without thinking about it, his hands move onto the table to cover hers and grazed over her knuckles. “It'll probably suck because I've never done this before, but we'll get better with practice.”

“Do you realize what you're saying?” Mara had to make sure he fully understood what he was saying. “We've been secretly seeing each other for _months_ -”

“We're not _seeing each other_!” He frowned in dislike when the words tumbled down Mara's lips. “As far as I'm concerned, you're my girlfriend. We kiss, we laugh together, we fuck, we sleep together, we support each other, we do everything but formalize it. I-”

The next words remained stuck in the back of his throat. He wasn't going to say _that_ , Mara knew it.

“I know,” she said. “I feel the same.”

The truth was that neither of them was frustrated the way William and Noora were. Those two were sexually frustrated, because sneaking off to an empty room at school and making out on a desk was the closest they ever got to reaching third base, but it wasn't the case for Mara and Chris. They had sex, they kissed, they slept in like any other couple. They had it all except the small things. They couldn't touch in public, they couldn't kiss good morning when they arrived at school, they couldn't go out after school. They craved something a drastically different than Will and Noora. It was easy finding a room void of people and stealing a few kisses, they had been doing so for months. But no amount of physical intimacy would replace the total and utter satisfaction of being able to sit on your boyfriend's lap in a room full of people who didn't care.

Meanwhile, their fellow students started coming up with far-fetched theories about what was going on for P-Chris to deny his attention to all the girls that hit on him at parties. Mara they were used to see alone because everyone knew she only dated guys from other schools, or older boys. But Chris had never been out of the spotlight for very long. Rumors began to pop up here and there.

“Come with me,” Mara said and gestured Chris to follow her as she stored her book back on its shelf and left the library under the librarian's nasty glares.

It was twenty past eleven, everyone was either in class or outside, but the hallways were empty, not a sound was to be heard apart from that of the chalk hitting the blackboard coming from the classrooms. Mara took Chris' hand, and he looked at her with a stunned expression, his mouth slightly agape.

“We're alone here,” she told him. “Let's pretend for just a minute that we're a normal couple, yeah?”

He didn't answer, instead he smiled at her and let go of her hand to wrap his arm around her shoulders pulling her close enough to kiss her temple. It was so simple, and so nice. Mara almost tripped on her feet when Chris had pulled her to his side and she giggled silently, bringing an arm around his waist as she snuggled his side in a way she had wanted to for a long time.

“I'm sorry we have to hide all the time,” Chris apologized though it wasn't his fault.

“Don't be. Better this than nothing at all,” Mara reassured him, letting her head rest against his shoulder and breathing in his scent. Chris smelled of expensive perfume and something else, something fresh she couldn't quite put her finger on.

She wouldn't trade her relationship with Chris for anything in the world. Nothing could make her regret her decision to tell him she liked him that night at the party. No matter how close she was with her brother, Mara would never give up her own aspirations and dreams for William's personal preference. If he didn't approve of her romantic interest, then he would just have to deal with it and suck it up because Chris was not going anywhere. But there was no need to tempt fate and make things worse than they might turn out if Will found out in his own time and place.

“Hey, want to hear a good one?” Mara asked, trying to move to a lighter subject.

“Shoot.”

“Noora's friend - I heard them talk about you this morning in the hallway when I was at my locker - one of them, Eva I think, has a theory on your sudden and weird behavior with girls!” Mara rolled her eyes at that and Chris smiled this smile she loved so much and that creased the corner of his eyes. “It's my favorite so far, really, it's very imaginative.”

“Just tell me already!”

“She thinks you're gay, and that you're secretly seeing this first year guy, Isak?” Mara wasn't sure about the name, but when she heard 'Chris' and 'gay' in the same sentence this morning, she almost chocked on thin air.

“Fuck, I thought I was being discrete about it!” Chris swore and for a second, Mara thought he was just joking along, but then she realized he was being serious and pulled back to give him a hard glare. “It's not that, Mara!” He laughed when he realized how it might have sounded. “Last week Isak's friend, Jonas, got jumped by the Yakuza guys. They've been after us for a while now and I told him to keep in touch if anything happened.”

“Anything I should be worried about?”

“I don't think so,” Chris said.

That was a huge difference between Chris and everyone else: he didn't lie. He didn't care about being blunt or indelicate, he just told the plain, cold truth. If there was any danger, he would have told her. But just like sometimes he looked at a situation on too bright a side.

“Someone's coming,” he added, quickly removing his arm from around Mara.

She was cold where Chris' arm rested second ago, and the abruptness of the separating almost felt painful. It wasn't supposed to be like this. They shouldn't have to act like they were guilty of something. Soon enough, a group of three girls walked through a door and their short but blessed moment of intimacy was over. A regretful gaze and sheepish smile was all they could give each other now that they had a public, however small it was.

“Still want to take me on a date?” Mara whispered.

“Tonight?” He asked, waiting for her to nod. “I'll pick you up at seven sharp. I'll text you before I leave so you can join me outside.”

“Deal. Don't be late.”

She smiled and with a wink and a twirl, she was out, leaving him in the hallway, completely oblivious to the way he watched her leave until she was out of sight.

 

1Russ overall

 


	10. Chapter 10

Chris came right on time. Short before seven o'clock, Mara's phone buzzed and she grabbed it without looking at the message, shoved it in her pocket and put on her coat before leaving through her window and going down the fire escape staircase to meet Chris. He was already there when she reached the backstreet, his car parked on the sidewalk. He didn't see her coming because he was on his phone – most likely texting her to tell her he had arrived. When she opened the door, Chris jumped on his seat, he hand flying up to cover his heart.

“Jesus!” He exclaimed. “You scared me, I thought it was someone else!”

“Don't get your panties in a twist,” Mara joked, leaning over to kiss him and wipe away his shocked expression at the same time. “Who else could it be?”

“Your br-”

“No, no, no!” Mara covered her ears. “No mentioning him tonight!”

A fond smile appeared on Chris' lips.

“I think I can do that,” he agreed. “We should have a secret code.”

“For what?”

“Signal our presence, so I can stop having heart attacks when you get into my car unannounced,” he explained.

“Do you want me to light up a bat signal in the sky?” Mara ask with a voice dripping with sarcasm.

Chris gave her a pointed look.

“No,” he drawled out. “Let's just start with knocking on the window, yeah?”

“I can't promise that I won't forget,” she laughed. “But I'll try.”

And off they were for their – as surreal as that sounded – first date. Whatever Chris had planned she knew she would enjoy it for the sole reason that she'll spend the whole evening with him and not have to hide for once. He warned her right away that it wasn't much, he just thought that she would like to have a quiet night and just eat something, walk around the city enjoy the last remains of the Christmas lights and the market.

To which she replied that it was perfect and she didn't ask for anything fancy or extraordinary. Actually, the more mundane, the better. As long as it was just the two of them and that they needn't worry about being seen.

Chris parked the car somewhere and they walked the rest of the way to the small restaurant he wanted to take her to. It was cozy and all the waiters had an accent she couldn't identify, and the food was delicious although she could hardly remember what she ordered. The entire first half of this date was a bit of a blissful blur in Mara's mind – she had been too caught up in Chris and laughing with him and sharing glances and kisses whenever it pleased her.

She vaguely recalled leaving the restaurant and feeling Chris' arm loop around her, bringing her as close to her as possible while they walked downtown. He meant to keep her warm and safe and Mara teased him because she had never thought he could be romantic – which earned her a snicker and a poke to the side, and then Chris literally swooped her off her feet and started carrying her over his shoulder while she protested vehemently under the puzzled gazes of the passersby. It was so nice to do shit like that out in the open and having no one giving a damn.

However, it didn't last long. Mara might have a hard time recalling every detail of what happened at the beginning of the evening, but she sure as hell remembered when it all went downhill. It was a voice. A voice coming from behind her, a voice she had never heard before, but by the look in Chris' eyes, he certainly had.

His smile fell and his eyes drifted from Mara to somewhere behind her, and when she turned around, her heart dropped in her stomach in the most unpleasant way. It was like there was a knot in her throat preventing her from asking Chris who these boys were.

They were a group of three, and nothing about them screamed friends. Sick smiles and nasty glares, that's what they were. Girls had a naturally good instinct when it came to sensing danger, and these boys gave her a bad feeling. If she was in full possession of her wits and if her legs obeyed her, Mara would have run away. However Chris' hand held onto hers in such a firm way that she probably wouldn't have been able to wriggle her way of his grip even if she had wanted to.

“Chris?” She croaked out with an effort.

Nobody said anything for over a minute – was it a minute? Or two? Or more? - and merely stared at one another, waiting for someone to make the first move. Anyone who saw them could tell there was something wrong, and soon, they were alone in the little street, the only light come from the bus stop a little farther down.

The three of them began to walk around them in order to surround them both. Chris pulled Mara behind him but they kept circling around them, and the girl's mind went blank. She saw them talk, their mouths moved, they laughed, they say something else, but she didn't hear a thing. Her hands were secured on Chris' shoulders to let him know she was right there, and she felt the way the tensed up and shook with anger.

Her phone in her pocket weighted heavy and Mara pondered whether or not it would be a good call to try and pull it out to call the police. No, they would notice and violence was sure to ensue. But what to do? Her brain was overwhelmed by hundreds of possible outcomes to this confrontation, and hypothetical ways to avoid it, but none of them were conclusive.

“Mara,” she heard Chris call her name.

“Oh, starboy is worried for his little girlfriend,” one of the boys snarled and now that Mara had come back to reality again, she thought that he voice was by far the nastiest sound she has ever heard. But it didn't get past her that he called Chris 'starboy'. They knew him. And suddenly it clicked. _The Yakuza guys_. Or at least, three of them.

The other two began to laugh way too loud at something that wasn't even that funny, and Chris took the opportunity to whisper something to Mara's ear.

“You run, okay? When they attack me, you run like _hell_!” He told her, using the authoritative voice he only resorted to for grave matters.

“No!” She protested, letting her stubborn side show. “I'm staying with you!” It wasn't a request, it wasn't option, Mara was not being stupid or making this decision thoughtlessly. She would stay by Chris' side no matter what.

“This is not the time to act brave, Mara!” Chris barked at her.

She knew it wasn't directed toward her, the situation justified his anger though. William had taught Mara a few things about self-defense. Geez, why didn't she pay more attention? Think, Mara, think! _Never let yourself be cornered_. Great, that was great. They were in a little street after dark, they were three, they were two, no corner around. _Find a wall and stay there, this way you won't have to worry about what's behind you_. Mara looked over her shoulder and sure enough the wall was only a few meters away. _Guys tend to focus on arm strength and underestimate girls, go for the weak parts, the stomach, the shin, the crotch_. Slowly, her brother's priceless advice came back to her, although in random order. _Use your nails. If you're wearing heels, use them too_. She wore boots, not the pointiest heels she owned, but it'll do if she has to step on some toes.

“Not so cocky anymore without your friends, huh Schistad?” The boy who seemed to be the leader asked.

His rhetorical question was once again answered by laughter from his two mates, as though it was their duty to signal their approval of whatever their leader said. Mara felt a surge of hatred and disdain for these disgusting people. Attacking a Chris because the other Penetrators weren't there, and while he was with a girl! She would like to say she could defend herself, but she probably couldn't, their attackers were much taller and broader than her and she never fought in her life. Chris was already disadvantaged because he was alone and they were three, but if he had to protect her too... It was logical that he asked her to run, but she simply could not.

Mara could not run away and leave Chris behind. This was not how she was, it was against her nature.

Suddenly, Chris' hand was on her stomach, and he pushed her backward rather abruptly, consequently knocking the air out of her and making her stumble back a few steps until she regained her balance and ran for the wall. One of the boys tried to grab onto her sleeve but she ripped it out of his grip. Good, one of them was going after her, this meant Chris wouldn't have to fight against all three of them.

“No!” Mara screamed when the first fist was raised.

Chris dodged it but not the second, although he was a lot fitter and swifter, Chris couldn't fight on two fronts at once. Mara's shouts and 'nos' would be a distraction to him. She wasn't an fighting expert, she wasn't even a fighting amateur, she was just a helpless spectator, but she knew Chris couldn't afford being distracted. Just when one of them tackled Chris and made him stumble back, giving the other the opportunity to hit him again, the third guy placed himself right in front of Mara, whose back crashed against the brick wall behind her.

“Well, well, well, what do we have here?” He asked with a twisted smirk. “Schistad sure as hell knows how to pick his shags,” he commented as he looked her up and down like she was some kind of merchandize on display for him.

Mara was so scared she could feel her entire body shake, but hell if she was going to let him see it. She tried pushing him back with both hands, but he barely seemed to acknowledge her attempt to get him to move out of her way.

“Fuck off!” She screamed, pushing him back yet again, except this time he grabbed her wrists and pulled her close to him.

Mara cursed and shouted at him in disgust as she tried to wriggle her way out of his grip. The longer he kept her body pressed against her, the more nauseous she felt. If he didn't let go soon, she was going to be sick. When she slammed her heel right onto his right foot, the guy let go just enough for her to free herself and he swore and threatened her for this.

“You fucking bitch! When I'm done with you we'll see if you still feel so bold! Not even Schistad is going to look at one when I'm finished!”

Mara didn't want to picture what he planned on doing her, and there was no way on earth she would let him do – or Chris for that matter. She knew she could count on him. Yet when she got a glimpse of him over the perv's shoulder, it was hardly Chris she saw, rather a limp body being severely beaten. He didn't even react anymore, and the two guys kept throwing punch after punch and they laughed. Mara thought she would never be able to forget this sound.

The third guy tried to force himself on her once again, cutting short to her horror-stricken staring at the scene behind him. In a surge of braveness, boldness, recklessness, call it whatever you like, she kneed the guy in the lower region of the stomach, and when he bent in two, she grabbed him by the hair to pull his head down and once again kneed him, right in the jaw. A sick crack was heard but she didn't stay long enough to contemplate the damage she had done. She ran to Chris and shoved on of the guys aside. Taken by surprise, he stumbled on his feet and fell to the ground, and the other's attention deviated from Chris long enough for him to hit back.

“Chris!” She called his name. “Chris!”

But Chris, despite his bloodied face, had still some fight in him and he didn't listen to her until he had overcome his last adversary. He had pushed the guy to the ground, and straddled him, hitting him again, and again, and again, and Mara lost count of how long this lasted, but she didn't have it in herself to tell him to stop, she didn't have nearly enough empathy for those guys to tell Chris that it was enough. At some point, he stopped, and it seemed like the boy was going to make it anyway. He coughed up some blood and groaned and then he rolled around. The guy Mara knocked out was slumped against the wall, and the third one quickly ran away as he realized he didn't have the advantage anymore.

As soon as he was out of sight, Chris collapsed on the ground, his knee hitting the cold, hard gravel of the road and Mara dived forward to try and catch him before he fell. She managed to wrap her arms around his torso just on time and his head didn't touch the ground.

“Chris!” She cried out, her vision blurring rapidly. “Chris, oh my god! Chris, stay with me!” She kept on demanding he didn't close his eyes and that he talked to her or _anything_! _Anything goddammit_! But he couldn't fall unconscious, not now! They were safe now. “Chris, please, stay with me!”

Tears were streaming down her face and they left a sensation of cold in their wake, as though the sharp winter wind were turning them to ice as it blew on her face. She couldn't be bothered to wipe them away, everything she saw was one big blur but all she needed right now was to feel the weight of Chris' body against her, and she thought she was going to faint of relief when she felt his arm wrap around her. He might not be able to answer her, but he tried to show her he was still awake. Mara pulled away and cradle his face in her hands, wiping away some of the blood and tears that covered his face.

“Chris,” she sighed, leaning her forehead against his. “You're alright?” She asked, earning a chuckle.

 

“I'm glad you stayed anyway,” he told her, trying to shoot her a smile but everything hurt and he had blood in his mouth.

Mara still hiccuped a laughter. She had never seen such a beautiful smile. Chris, _oh_ Chris...

“C'mon, we can't stay here,” he told him gently. “We have to go and find help. Call an ambulance, call the poli-”

“No, no police. No hospital.” It was final.

“But look at you! You need to see a doctor!” She insisted.

“I'm fine,” he croaked out, doing his best to sound sure of himself and not show in how much pain he was. “I'll be fine. Just- call William.”

A lot of things ran through Mara's mind within the two seconds of complete silence that followed Chris' request. Among which questions like: what? Come again? Are you out of your mind? Are you sure? And a long list of other variations of those, but in the end, there was only one thing to do.

“Okay,” she said softly. “Okay, I'll call him.”

 


	11. Chapter 11

The call to William was the most surreal experience of Mara's life and it was much confusing too. At first he didn't understand why she was calling him, she was supposed to be in her room... right? And then she had to explain what happened, while trying to leave out the part where she was on a date with Christoffer. News like this are not to be announced on the phone. She remained concise and to the point then hung up, and together, Chris and Mara made their way to his car.

“What did he say?” Chris questioned when they reached the car at length.

“Nothing at all, I didn't give him the time to,” Mara said sternly. “It's going to be a long night.”

“Already is,” Chris said with a wince. “He's going to flip.”

It would have been superficial to add anything to this. Those were tensed minutes until William's arrival. They both knew they couldn't hide anymore and they wondered what fresh hell awaited them once William realized they have been lying to his face for months. When Will's car parked next to Chris', they were sitting on the back seat, Mara cradling Chris' face while her hands brushed back his hair and her heart hammered in her chest, both from the adrenaline and the anticipation of her brother's reaction.

“The fuck's going on?”

They heard William before even seeing him, but neither of them batted a lash. Just a few more seconds...

“Mara?!” William opened the back door and froze. “Mara? Are you alright? Chris, what happened?”

His worry seemed to be blinding him to the scene unfolding before his eyes, but soon, his eyes settled on them and Mara witnessed the very moment he understood the situation.

 

*

 

It's been over an hour now. An hour since they were back at the apartment, and even Mara's half-hour shower couldn't drown out the shouts coming from the living room. William had been steaming off on Chris, who took every verbal strike in silence – or sullen dignity, whatever you want to call it. She knew it was unlike Chris to remain quiet and soon his hot blood would make him say something he doesn't mean.

Mara would go mad if she listened to this for one more minute. With half dried hair, a bruised face and knees and frenzied eyes she burst out of her room.

“For heaven's sake! Shut up! Do you hear me?! _Shut up_!”

William paused in the middle of a sentence and both boys stared at her in a sort of awed respect and confusion. After cleaning him up, it turned out Chris' injuries weren't as severe as all the blood might have led her to think, and he was only a little stunned by the punches. More fear than casualty, but still, he was in bad shape, and for that alone Mara was mad at William who shouldn't be yelling at him.

“What is wrong with you?!” She shouted to William. “We were just attacked, and all you find to do is to yell at your best friend! You need to sort out your fucking priorities!” She spat out angrily, storming past him and toward Chris.

“Look at him, William!” Mara ordered her brother, gesturing to Chris. “I said look at him goddammit! Look what they've done to him!”

“I can see it Mara!” William yelled back.

“Then why be so hard on him?!”

“Mara, it's fine, really...” Chris said, placing a hand on her shoulder.

For a second, she detached her eyes from William and looked at her boyfriend. Her battered boyfriend who took in so many punches tonight and still did. Her right hand instinctively covered Chris' but she focused back on William.

“So hard? _So hard_?” William laughed in a cruel way. “You two have been fucking me over for hell knows how long and you think I should settle down just because he took a few punches?!”

“We haven't been fucking you over!” Chris suddenly stepped in.

Apparently as long as William only targeted him he was fine with it, but if he started to attack their relationship he couldn't stay still anymore.

“We knew you'd react like this, so we kept quiet, can you blame us?!” Mara continued, stepping closer to Chris.

“I forbid you-” William started when he saw the two of them stand together. “-you don't touch her,” he directed that threatening sentence to Chris.

“That's not up to you anymore,” Chris said in calm and collected voice which impressed Mara.

“And you-” this time he turned to Mara. “Last month, when you asked me about why I don't let any of my friends date you... It for about _him_? Were you already screwing my best friend behind my back? And you just lied to my face when I asked you if you liked him?”

Mara could feel Chris' eyes on her – she had never told him about this conversation.

“What else was I supposed to do? You were going on and on about how your friends weren't good enough for me and you still expected me to answer honestly when you asked me if I was into one of them?” She asked with a frown on her face.

William was too wrapped up in his own anger to recognized the validity of her argument.

“Do you think _Chris_ is _not good enough_ for me?” She kept asking questions her brother couldn't answer, because his reason told him she was right and his stubbornness refused to admit it.

“Wait, wait wait,” Chris cut them off. “You've been going around telling Mara we weren't good enough for her? Just like that?”

A long silence answered his question and that was as good as a confession.

“I can't believe it!” Chris said, between laughter and disbelief. “It's because of me, right? It's because I told you I liked her that you made up that rule about no one dating her.” He rubbed his face with both hands as though it would help him sort out his thoughts.

“What? What are you saying?” Mara looked at Chris for an explanation.

“When I was in first year I admitted I found you pretty, and that's when William came up with his stupid rule!” He said. “It was just a thought man!” Chris stared at William, now just as angry as him. “I didn't plan on swooping her off her feet and running away with her, for fuck's sake!”

“And what do you call seeing her behind my back, then?” Will barked back.

“That's not the _point_ , Will!” Mara reclaimed his attention and stepped between the two boys when she saw them step forward. “You don't have a saying in who I date! And I don't even see why you're against it! Chris is your best friend! He just got beat up while trying to protect me from the Yakuza, because they wanted revenge after _you_ hit them with a fucking bottle.”

She whipped her head around to look at Chris and he gave her a small smile.

“If that's not good enough for you, then maybe you should reevaluate your standards,” she finished, glaring daggers at her fuming brother.

“ _Protecting_ you?! Yeah, let's talk about how good a job he did at that. Have you seen yourself in a mirror?”

Indeed she had, and she didn't expect any less than what she saw. There was a gash across her left cheek, from the slap the guy gave her – he must have been wearing a ring. And blood was all over her mouth and chin from the nosebleed caused by the second punch, this time right in the nose. Maybe she would get a black eye tomorrow. And her knees were scraped open from when she dived forward to prevent Chris from hitting the ground.

“And so what? Do you have any idea what they planned to do to me? It could have been a thousand times worse if Chris hadn't been there or if I didn't remember what you taught me to defend myself!”

“He's right, Mara,” Chris sighed from behind her. “You got hurt an-”

“No he's not! William, you've always been the more reasonable of us three, now is not the time to be a hot head and refuse to admit that you were wrong! Chris and I are together, whether you like it or not. And you should be grateful he was with me tonight. God knows what would have happened if the Yakuza jumped either of us on our own. Instead of yelling at us like you're doing right now, you might be at the hospital, waiting for your sister or your best friend to wake up after being assaulted.”

“And that's supposed to make me change my mind about you two? You still lied to me, you lied for-”

“Four months,” Chris finished for him. It was why they were doing all of this. They needed to come clean to him. “We've been together for four months.”

“Fourth months!” William repeated while running a hand through his hair and looking away in utter disbelief. “And I should just shrug it off and wish you the best? He didn't even do a good job at protecting you tonight and you think I'll just give him a pat on the back and let him fuck my little sister?”

“Don't be so fucking rude and condescending!” Mara pushed William back and the stumbled back a couple steps.

“Mara!” Chris tried to calm her down. “This is not the solution. He'll come around...”

“I think I told you not to touch her!” Will suddenly burst out and shoved Mara aside to directly confront Chris. “You keep your hands off of her, or I swear the Yakuza won't be the only ones responsible for your injuries today.”

“Fuck off, Will!” Chris replied in a challenging tone. There was a time for being docile and quiet and another for standing up for yourself. Although William was a bit taller than Chris, he didn't lack presence or pride and rose up his chin in defiance. “If you don't accept this, you lose us both. Is that what you want? Because I'm not letting her slip through my fingers again. I already renounced to her once, out of respect for you, but if you have so little consideration for me as to tell Mara I'm not _good enough_ , then maybe I took the wrong decision back then. Maybe you're not worth scarifying my _relationship_ with my _girlfriend_ for your pretty eyes.”

“You speak of respect? Is it respect to use my sister to fulfill your needs and never take her out under the pretense of keeping your relationship a secret from me?” Will asked, stepping even closer, in such a way that he was looking down on Chris.

“Will,” Mara called him and the boys looked at her, stopping their pissing contest. She wanted to tell him it was her who initiated it. Not Chris. She ran after him, and he refused at first, because he didn't want her to be his dirty little secret. But she was absolutely furious and out of her mind that her own brother would be so selfish as to not even ask her how she felt – not once during this whole conversation. Not one “Are you okay, sis? Did they touch you? Why did you hide this from me? Do you have feelings for Chris?” No everything was about William Fucking Magnusson, and all the others could go suck a dick. So she said, “you're wrong, on every account.”

She expected him to start yelling again but he just huffed and turned around, a bitter smile on his lips and a tired glimmer in his eyes.

“Get out.”

“What?” Mara and Chris asked at the same time. This seemed to set afire something within William.

“Get out! Get out of my fucking apartment!”

It was obviously directed at Chris. William was now facing away from them both, and while Chris silently asked Mara if she would be fine if he left now, she mimicked the gesture to knock, and he nodded before leaving. When the front door shut, Mara stormed back into her room to gathered a few items of clothes. She carried her school bag on one shoulder, and her other bag on the other, and without saying anything, she left through the window, after leaving her phone on her desk next to a note that said 'you know where I am'. And she climbed down the fire escape stairway, joining Chris at the bottom of them for the second time tonight.

She knocked on the window and climbed into the car.

“You were right about the secret code, it came in handy after all,” was the first thing she said.

“Are you sure you don't want to stay? He'll probably calm down.”

“Yeah, I'm sure. I need to calm down too before I speak to him again. Besides, I told you: I'm staying with you,” Mara assured him, placing a hand on his high.

If someone saw them right now they would laugh or be shocked upon seeing their bruised faces, they looked utterly wretched, but they still believed they didn't do so bad today. They had their first date, which ended rather abruptly but still had a marvelous beginning. They survived an assault and kicked some ass together. And most of all, they needn't hide anymore now.

“We deserve a good night rest I think,” Mara sighed in a faint laugh. “A twenty-four hours nap.”

“At the very least,” Chris agreed and started the car, leaving behind them the remnants of these dreadful last couple hours. “Don't worry,” Chris added when he saw Mara close her eyes just for a second. “He'll wrap his head around it, he just needs time, William's always been a thick head.”

“But he's never been _mean_...” She replied. “I just- I don't want to think about it anymore, he's behaved like an ass, and he's earned his loneliness tonight.”

“Fucking William,” Chris grumbled. “I honestly didn't expect him to yell at _you_.”

“You're not supposed to take all the knocks for me,” she told him. “I'm as guilty as you.”

“But he was right about me not protecting you the way I should have.”

“This is not a dumb fairytale, I'm not a damsel in distress and you're not a dragon slayer! We beat the Yakuza together, and we told Will the truth together, and now, well, he'll just have to accept that we're a package deal.”

“A package deal?” He asked in a low chuckle. “I like the sound of that.”

His infamous smirk was back, although it was tainted of black and blue and it evidently hurt to do so. In a gesture that was both swift and done with an ease that could only be acquired with practice, he slipped a hand on her knee and there he held her during the entire car ride to his house.

“Hey Chris?” Mara called him after several minutes of comfortable silence.

His eyes drifted from the road to look at her briefly, showing her that she had his full attention.

“I had a really good time today.”

Then she shot him the brightest of smiles and they laughed together.

 


	12. Chapter 12

That night, Chris didn't get much sleep. He remembered closing his eyes several times but whenever he opened them again to check his phone, he saw that barely ten minutes had passed. The clock on his wall above his desk ticked away every goddamn second, and in the middle of the silent night, it made ten times the noise it did during daylight. Somewhere between two and three in the morning, he thought he would lose his wits if he had to suffer one more minute of this infernal tic tac tic tac, and he got up and opened the window to throw the damn thing out.

“Chris?” Mara's sleepy voice called his name.

Whether she was awake due to him leaving the bed or the cold gust of wind that come in through the opened window he could not tell.

“What did that poor clock do to you?”

“It was so noisy! Didn't you hear it?” He complained, slamming the window shut.

“No, I was asleep,” she said, leaning on her elbows to look at him though it was pitch black expect for the faint moonlight. “Why are you still awake?”

“I can't sleep,” Chris groaned as he climbed back in bed, under the comforting warmth of the sheets and beside Mara.

She shifted position and laid across the bed so her head could rest on Chris' stomach while she faced him. Without thinking about it, they intertwined their fingers.

“What are you doing?” Chris asked in a hushed voice, although there was no one else but them in the entire two floors, suburban house Chris lived in.

“I'm not sleeping if you don't,” she simply declared, her eyes never leaving his.

Chris chuckled and smiled fondly before directing his gaze upward.

“You're just as stubborn as him,” he said, knowing that Mara would know he was talking about William.

“Yes, but I'm cuter than him which means I can get away with it.”

That earned a huff and a frank snort from Chris who apparently wasn't convinced.

“That only works with parents, and it's because you're their only daughter. If Will was the only child – or even the only _son_ – he would be the little Magnusson prodigy.”

Mara was about to say something to demolish his argument but she bit her tongue before accidentally saying the wrong thing. Family in general was a rather touchy subject for Chris. Therefore it would have been insensitive of Mara to object that he was an only child, and yet he wasn't anywhere near being the prodigy child of his family.

Actually, it would have been terrible to say this out loud. Even thinking the words made her feel like a horrible person. It wasn't Chris' fault that his parents never gave him the time of day – or the time of year. Though she knew, without having to ask, that he blamed himself for his parent's lack of interest in him. That's why he pushed himself so much. He was one of the best students of Nissen, though he might deny it if someone asked, and he excelled at an impressive number of extra-curricular activities too, including a large panel of sports and playing a couple instruments. Surprisingly enough, he was also an excellent cook – mainly due to the fact that he lived _alone_.

“You should try to sleep,” she told him, bringing their joined hands on her neck to place his hand here, where she knew she was warm. “I'm upset too, Chris. But we have to sleep on it, and tomorrow it won't feel as dramatic anymore.”

He nodded slowly, distractedly rubbing circles with his thumb on Mara's neck.

“What have you been thinking about all night if you haven't slept?” She questioned as she returned to her initial position – that is, with her body pressed against Chris'.

He avoided looking at her, and tried to shrug the question off, as though it was too boring to tell her and of no important whatsoever. With two fingers, Mara turned his head toward her, forcing him to meet her eyes. The look she gave him must have convinced him to answer.

“I've been replaying the last four months in my head, trying to think about what we would have done differently, but-”

Mara waited patiently for him to finish, despite having an idea of what he was trying to put into words.

“-but there isn't a second of the time I spent with you that I'd want to change. You keep me going, Mara.”

 _You keep me going_. It wasn't an 'I love you', it was a thousand times better – it meant something to Chris. It meant everything to her.

“Come here,” she instructed, gesturing him to put his head on her chest.

Too exhausted and sleepy to argue with her, Chris complied and nestle his head against her bosom, immediately welcomed by her soft warmth that she seemed to be the only one to emit. Her hand massaged his scalp and Mara's chin came to rest on his head.

As promised, she didn't close her eyes before she was certain Chris had fallen asleep, to the steady sound of her heartbeat .

 

*

 

The next couple days were a mix of random happiness attacks followed by self-reproach whenever William's name sneaked its way back into the conversation or their minds. At first, it was great, it was like having a party in tête à tête, with the whole house at their disposition.

“I guess your parents won't be coming home and find us hanging around with barely any clothes on?” Mara had asked in carefully thought out voice, laced both with playfulness and concern. Chris had shaken his head no, the tip of his nose brushing against hers with every movement.

“This means I can stay for the week-end?” She insisted, feeling overwhelmingly happy at the simple thought.

“You can stay forever,” he said, using his smooth, dom juan voice on her, as if it had any effect on her. Mara was immune to his tricks, he knew that, but it didn't hurt to test her once in a while.

“Do girls really fall for that?” She couldn't help but laugh.

“Usually.”

He shrugged and shot her an innocent smile - though innocent had a whole new meaning when you associate the word with Christoffer. Here it has nothing to do with being pure, Mara merely uses it as an antonym to guilty.

“No but seriously-” His smile dropped. “You can stay with me as long as you want. You could probably move in and my parents still wouldn't notice until their next visit.”

She knew it wasn't an actual invitation to move in with him – they weren't _there yet_. The bitterness of his tone perfectly conveyed how upset it made him to have absent parents. It was a double edged feeling really, because on the one hand he had grown so used to living alone that he would probably quickly get tired of them if they suddenly swirled back into his life from one day to the next, but on the other, there were times when the loneliness was unbearable. The silence reigning in the house, the unused rooms getting dusty... If it weren't for the maid that came once a week, this house would look like a haunted mansion, with spider webs in each corner and a centimeter of dust on the furniture. Everything looked like the front page of a furniture magazine, it was pristine – or in Chris' words, _lifeless_.

“When was the last time you saw them?”

It was a risky question – the chances that Chris would simply refuse to answer and go brood in a corner were as high as those of getting an honest answer.

“Honestly?” Well, Mara was in luck today. “I can't remember. One day I came home after school, and there was a Christmas tree in the middle of the living room, and there were presents under it, and a note attached to the biggest one. It said 'Merry Christmas, sorry we couldn't stay, work stuff',” Chris laughed, but only because it was the kind of painful story that needed to be laughed about or it would be too sad. “That's the last time I heard anything from my parents. Before that... I have no idea when I saw them last.”

“What did you do?” She frowned. Chris had been invited to the Magnussons' modest Christmas dinner – with just Will and Mara in front of The Grinch – but he had declined. He had told them he had dinner with his parents.

“I brought the tree to the old lady who lives down the road and gave the presents to charity,” he said with a shrug. “On Christmas Eve I got drunk like never before and the next day I nursed a massive hangover. Merry Christmas me.”

It's sad to say but it isn't the first time Mara hears this. Ever since his mom had to go in rehab for her alcohol problem, it went a little more downhill every year. She was always a rather mentally fragile woman, but now all she did was spent her time in rehab, in spiritual retreats somewhere in across the world, or doing shopping in Paris and Milan. Where she stored her insane amount of shoes, that Chris didn't know. And his mom's sudden departure from 'home' caused his dad to take refuge in his work, at first barely seeing Chris before he left in the morning, then one day, he simply moved out in an apartment downtown, next to the building he worked at, for 'practical reasons'. Ever since, this was basically Chris' house.

“Sometimes I really wish I could knock some sense into your parents,” Mara replied with a groan of frustration. “You should have come when we invited you. You know you're always welcom-”

“Not anymore,” he cut her off. “And I don't care if I have to spend Christmas alone. It's just another day of the year.”

“It shouldn't be! And don't say that... You said it yourself, Will will come back to his senses and apologize for being a dick. He considers you his brother.”

“This is taking an incestuous turn,” he chuckled to change to subject.

“Chris.” Mara said in a stern tone though she rolled her eyes at his remark. “Your parents are assholes. If they don't want to get to know you, it's _their loss_ believe me.”

“Don't say that. You can't understand, you and Will willingly spent the holidays without them.”

“They're blood, but they're not family – in a sense,” she explained rather simply. “Us rich kids don't always have it nice and easy when it comes to our relatives. But this doesn't mean we can't make a family of our own. Whether you want it or not, you're part of mine, and next Christmas, there'll be a plate for you at our table.”

“What if we break up?” He asked, trying to find a loophole in her beautiful theory about making a family of their own.

“Well, you'll have to sit next to the _second_ cutest Magnusson sibling, and I won't share my dessert with you, but you'll still be invited.”

A low chuckle fell from his mouth, and Mara could see by the small crinkles at the corner of his eyes that he was convinced by her arguments at this point. It w as still early in the morning, they didn't get nearly as much sleep as they would have liked to, but they still crawled out of bed because they were hungry. After a few attempts at making an omelet that wasn't burnt, they finally sat down at the kitchen counter and dug in, one hand holding the fork, the other one the coffee mug that would fuel them for the day – or the morning, at the very least. Caffeine and the knowledge of having each other to lean on if things became too much were the only things that helped them hold it together.

“That's peachy,” he eventually said, gulping down more of his coffee, as though he was a thirsty man in the middle of a desert. “I guess now that you have some coffee in you I can tell you that you have a monstrous black eyes.”

“I what?!” Mara practically shrieked.

The girl nearly fell off her chair when she grabbed her spoon to look at herself. The deformed reflexion gave her a vague idea of the severity of the bruise, but it was clear that it was very purple and very noticeable. She whipped her head toward Chris who ate his breakfast with a little satisfied smirk on his face, as though he had been waiting the right moment to drop the news during their whole conversation.

“Right back at you, Schistad! You're in no better shape than me!”

Mara held the spoon at Chris' eye level to show him his bruise but he seemed thoroughly unimpressed. Of course he was expecting it.

“We're like those lame couples who wear matching sweaters, but on, like, a whole new level!” She wailed, raising both her hands.

“Yet another proof that we're the best. Even in our lameness,” he declared proudly, grinning as he picked Mara up from her seat and sat her on his lap to nuzzle her neck, placing light kisses here and there.

And forgotten was William, forgotten were Christoffer's disappointing parents or the pile of burnt omelets set on the counter. Nothing mattered in this moment, expect that they were together. Alone together, and free to do whatever they pleased, including – and that was the best part – leaving the house and showing themselves.

Which they absolutely didn't do from the entire week-end.


	13. Chapter 13

“Ready?”

“I was born ready.”

“I'm serious, Chris!”

“I know you're serious, that's why I'm joking, _geez_ , don't get your panties in a twist!”

“I can't, I'm not wearing any,” Mara replied, raising a brow and smirking. Chris' eyes switched between her eyes and her skirt several times and both his eyebrows shot up in pleasant surprise. “I'm kidding Chris, we're at school, of course I'm wearing underwear.”

“Way to crush a man's hopes, Mara,” he groaned before reaching back to grab his backpack which rested on the backseat of his Mercedes. “I should be the one asking you if you're ready. You've been a ball of nerves since this morning, I swear if you faint on me-”

“I won't _faint_!” She shoved him in the shoulder to get her point across though it seemed to have the reverse effect.

“It's gonna be fine,” he reassured her. “You'll make lots of jealous!” Chris winked at her and opened the door to exit the car.

Mara followed him out before asking, “Why would I make people jealous? If anyone should be envied today it's you! You've caught the most prized of all Nissen girls in your nets,” she said with a bright smile.

“Shut up or your head won't fit through the door,” he warned her.

Her jaw fell open and after reminding him that he was in no position to tell her that given the gigantic size of his ego, Chris threw his arm over her shoulders and began to walk toward the school's gates. However Mara shrugged it off before they reached them.

“Not yet,” she said. “No need to add up to our dramatic entrance.”

Something akin to perplexity crossed his features, but it vanished before Mara could determine what it really was. He understood her hesitation to throw their relationship out in the wild a couple days after they came clean to William. He would see it as a way of rubbing it in his face and that was the last thing they wanted. Not to mention that they still both sported a black eye and other various facial bruises – which was enough to make hundreds of different rumors erupt in the school before noon. Nissen was a gossip machine. People were used to seeing them hang out with each other, which gave them a bit of time before everyone realized that it wasn't so platonic anymore, though it was bound to happen. But Chris and Mara would not blow on the red embers of gossip.

Sure enough, whispers greeted them and people looked at them in shock and concern when they stepped through the gates, looking like they had undergone a severe beat up. Which they did, but they should see the other guys.

“What?!” Chris barked at a group of boys from first year that openly ogled them when they walked past them.

“Since when do girls participate in the riot club's fights?” One of them snickered. He wore a beanie from under which curly brown hair peeked out. The remark was most likely not meant to be offensive, but Mara was on edge and she didn't exactly like having a black eye.

“Since they can kick ass just as good as the next fella,” Mara huffed, shooting him a nasty glare. “Need me do demonstrate?”

“No, Jonas was just joking,” another one said with a nervous laughter, looking panicked at the thought of provoking the school's princess and the Penetrators' protégée.

“I bet he was,” Chris simply said, his tone leaving no doubt as to the fact that he wasn't convinced at all. “We don't endanger our girls, the Yakuza guys jumped us on the street.”

With that, they walked away, still putting a polite distance between them since the attention of the entire Nissen population was onto them. It was a heartbreak to still have to act so distant after what they have been through. But among all the eyes directed at them were also William's, who was leaning against the wall nearby the front door, surrounded by his friends.

“Why did you tell them?” Mara asked. “They didn't even ask in the first place.”

“I know, but at least this way we might cut short the apparition of nasty rumors and go straight for the true rumor,” he explained.

“Who knows, maybe William will change his mind if everyone starts talking about how we nearly ended up at the hospital because of those Yakuza jerks,” she sighed, not knowing who she was trying to convince. “Come, we have to say hi.”

“Of course we'll say hi, I won't stop being a Penetrator just because your brother flipped at us,” he snorted, heading for the group of boys. “If he thinks he can get rid of me by giving me the stink eye from afar, he's gravely mistaken. I'm just as important as him in the group.”

“It's not a question of importance, it's friendship,” Mara pointed out. “Look at the way they stare at us. Do you think he has outted us?”

That would be a petty move, even from her manipulator brother. The Magnussons didn't go for one another throats, it was a tacit rule between them. It was a relief when Chris began to greet his friends with a pat on the shoulder and they started questioning them about their battered faces. Obviously William didn't tell on them. Although they were still mad at each other, Mara shot him a thankful glance, and he simply looked away.

 

*

 

Boys – most of them that is – were generally rather oblivious to anything they didn't want to see. Was that a condition? Something like selective awareness? Probably not, but it was still a real thing in Mara's mind. Most of the Penetrators disregarded the blatant hostility that made the air electric between Chris and William, but there came a certain point where this selective awareness became downright blindness, and event he most stubborn of them acknowledged that there was something wrong. They knew better than to ask questions, but when people started talking and Mara and Christoffer's public, though discrete, displays of affection reached their ears, they easily put two and two together.

Surprisingly, a good deal of them congratulated Chris, instead of being mad at him for breaking _the rule_ – a rule that some of them would have liked to break themselves given by the looks they gave Mara. Chris was mostly happy about the situation – at least that's what he told her – and whenever he caught one of the guys looking his girlfriend up and down, he simply gave him a warning glare, followed by a possessive glance to Mara, who giggled when she saw this silent exchange.

At home it was drastically different though. By 'home' Mara meant in privacy. She went back to the apartment once in a while, because it was her apartment too, for fuck's sake, which allowed her to get new clothes to change into and it also forced William to spend a minimum time with her. Sometimes, when they were both sitting at the far ends of the couch, sulking in tense silence, it felt like he was about to say something, like his intention to speak was making the air sizzle. Except that he never said anything. She understood that she lied to him and that it felt like an unforgivable betrayal to him, because the two people he trust most have gone and dated behind his back for months.

She had no idea how she would feel if she were in his shoes.

“Will?” She had called him names softly on numerous occasion, but she was met with a wall of silence. “I'm sorry.”

That was usually it. Mara would leave before the tension in the room broke her walls down and made her spill the tears she has been holding back since their huge fight.

When she came back to Chris' house she was a mess, and he had to put back her broken pieces. Still, she was doing at lot better than him – at least deep down. Christoffer was used to pull a facade of confidence at all times, and this was no different from the time his parents sent him a birthday card on the wrong date. He would be the strong one, he _had_ to be the strong one.

Behind the silly jokes, and under the thick layer of sarcasm and sexual innuendos he made all day long, was a boy longing for his best friend. Mara suspected he was just trying to appear tough and that he was deeply affected by the current situation. She knew he still couldn't sleep well. Day after day she saw the circles under his eyes grow darker. She was no better really, all she seemed to do was sleep, as if by some miracle, she would wake up and find that everything was back to how it should be, and not this unspeakable mess.

Communication is key, they say. Mara and Chris continued to use their silent way to communicate. A glance, a smile, an eye roll, or the lack thereof spoke volumes. Chris wasn't good with words, he was good at showing. And Mara was observant, she didn't need to hear him say he was feeling miserable because it was blatantly obvious, to the point where it hurt her. Whenever she caught a glimpse of Chris when his guard was down, her heart clenched a little bit, and she felt awfully responsible. She was the cause for all this mess, she started it.

Therefore, she had to make it better, using whatever means necessary.

“I want cake.”

It was the first thing Chris said this afternoon. Mara came back from one of her weekly visits to William, and he was slouched on his couch, his eyes fixated on something far behind the TV though his hand continued to zap from one channel to another.

“Let's bake one,” he suggested.

“What kind of cake?” Mara asked.

“Well depends, do you have a personal preference?” He asked, shifting his attention from the wall to her.

“I do, but I don't know how to bake it,” she said, walking closer to the couch. She reached her hand out for him to take and help him up, but instead, Chris grabbed it and pulled her down on him. Mara gasped and tried to soften the blow for Chris by rolling next to him.

“No, come here,” he demanded, picking her up and lying her on his body, cradling her head against his chest and massaging the back of her neck in this mindless, almost instinctive manner that never failed to make her feel safe and giddy inside. “I'm a chef, I'll figure out how to bake your cake. What is it?”

“A lemon drizzle cake,” she laughed, raising her head to place a kiss on his lips. Chris looked utterly exhausted.

“Why this cake?” He inquired.

“I found a lovely place downtown that makes these bite sized English desserts and this one is my favorite,” she answered, letting her hand rested flat against Chris' chest, feeling the reassuring thump thump thump of his heart in the palm of her hand.

Not even a second later, Chris had swooped her up in his arms and carried her to the kitchen under her vehement protests which she only vociferated out of pure formality. A few Google links for recipes and broken eggs later, the cake was in the oven, and the kitchen was a mess. Mara stuck to what she knew how to do and whisked the eggs whites until they forms a peak, and gated the lemons while Chris did the actual measuring and baking part.

“See? We did it. Easy peasy,” he said, as though the entire kitchen wasn't a war zone.

“Never doubted your mad cooking skills,” Mara laughed, jumping on a relatively clean spot on the counter. Chris placed himself between her legs as per usual – there truly wasn't any other place on earth he liked to be most. When he began to kiss her, his hands sneaking behind Mara to grab her bum, she moaned softly in the kiss.

“What are you doing?” He asked after pulling back. Both her hands were raised in the air, refusing to touch him.

“My hands are full of dough!” She protested, her smile never wavering.

“Do I look like I give a fuck?” He asked, shaking his head in disbelief. “We have thirty minutes to make out and take a shower before the cake's ready.”

“You really have a knack for taking showers with me, do you? It is your kink? Wet, hot, shower sex?”

“Don't use words like that Mara, you have no idea what you do to me,” he groaned, hooking his hands under her thighs and securing them around his hips. “Now put your fucking hands on me. Shower sex is not a kink. I'm thinking about the planet. We're saving water.”

“You're making a compelling argument,” she said as she nodded sternly – or at least, she tried to look serious.

He saw right through her and leaned in again, claiming the well deserved kiss he earned after this chaotic baking session. Mara complied and kissed back, her hands mindlessly tugging at his shirt to make him understand she wanted it off. Chris gave her a boyish grin and gladly complied, before lifting her up and from the counter and carrying her to the bathroom, leaving his shirt on the dirty kitchen floor.

It wasn't as languid as per usual, and while Mara's back was pressed against the hard tiles of the shower walls, she thought that maybe he was fucking her because it helped him exorcise his pain. Christoffer Schistad was aching all over because for the first time in his life, he simply couldn't have it all. It tore him apart to know that being with the two people he was the closest with, his best friend, and his other best friend and girlfriend, suddenly became mutually exclusive. Mara saw it in the glimmer in his eyes when he dived them in her as she bit her lip to stifle a moan caused by his caresses. She heard it in the way he talked, she felt it in the way he touched her. He could act tough and detached, but he couldn't lie to her.

Only to himself.

 

 


	14. Chapter 14

Chris was the first one to cast a stone at Mara. It was predictable – it honestly was – though a bystander might have bet on Mara to do that. Chris was so entirely committed to her, in a way he never was to any other girl before, that people tended to forget how devoted he actually was to his friendship with William. And some might even wonder if it didn't outweigh his affection for Mara.

That's what Mara was forced to think about after he snapped at her not even a week after their fight with William. She missed her brother so very much. She missed eating dinner with him and commenting out loud the stupid movies broadcast on the local channel. She missed walking on him when he was on the phone with Noora and catching small glimpses of his most tender side. Mara missed her big brother. But she knew – and Chris knew it – that William would get over himself and talk to her again at some point. Because they were family – not just by blood, and not just at heart, but both. Which is why Chris suffered all the more.

 

This led to a fast paced Thursday afternoon filled with untamed passion and misplaces aggressiveness. Everything escalated very quickly for Chris and before he realized what was happening, he was in yet another fight with the Yakuza guys.

The whole day William had tried twice as hard as usual to get rid of him, and turn the other Penetrators against him. He didn't hide his blatant contempt for his former best friend, and openly suggested he just go home so he and the other could finally have fun. Chris stood firm on his position and argued until he had the support of everyone but William.

“What are you gonna do? Chain me up?” Chris had snickered, earning a few laughs from the group of boys watching the dispute. “I'm more fun than you could ever dream to be anyway. Mara is more fun than you,” he said, which caused a huge vein to throb on Will's temple. It was disloyal of Chris to play this card, but it was too late for regrets, the stupid things had been said. “Just kiddin'. Why the serious face? Can't take a joke?” Chris said in bad faith.

“Do you really want to go down this path, Chris?” William had asked him, ever so severe.

“There's no going down for me anymore, mate. I've reached rock bottom the day you told me to leave,” he answers just loud enough for William to hear but no one else. “You wanted this, didn't you? Rivalry? Internal tensions? Pettiness? Well, now you got it! I'm playing your game.”

William wanted to smash Christoffer's head against the nearest wall in hopes that it would knock some fucking sense into the boy, but chances were his skull was harder to break through than the concrete wall. From the day William had put an end to their... whatever, Chris hadn't stopped pushing him in hopes to corner him. He didn't stand down and distance himself from the Penetrators, he made himself even more essential to the group and took a leading role despite Will's attempts at thwarting his plans. Everybody liked Chris. He was charismatic enough to convince the whole of them to do anything he wanted against their better judgment, and he was the life of every party. If Chris wasn't there, it wasn't a party, it didn't really start until he walked in. William had the calm yet stern authority and the magnetism to make people gather around him like a flock of sheep around the Shepard, but without Chris he lacked something. He didn't appeal to them the same way Chris did.

“Fine, be an obstinate ass, like I care!” William eventually said, clearly losing this round.

It wasn't such a sore loss since he won every other one during the week, but to Chris it evidently meant victory. Whatever the hell William had planned to do later that day, he will have to count Chris in, because if William could haunt all his nights and spoil his days, then he was in his damn right to ruin what he had in mind for tonight.

 

*

 

Mara's day was much different. Good different. The entire school day turned out unexpectedly nice and by the time she came back home, she was smiling bigger than she had during the past week.

After lunch break, when it was almost time to go back to class and Mara was grabbing her books for her afternoon classes at her locker, she made a fortunate encounter. She met Noora. Not that she didn't know her before, she just never actually spoke to her in person. In Mara's mind, Noora was just William's pretty girlfriend who was a year younger than her. The blond girl was trying to pile up an astounding number of books but they tumbled down and slipped from her arms. Mara instinctively dived forward to grab them before they hit the ground but she wasn't fast enough.

“Shit! Sorry,” Mara said even though there was nothing to apologize for.

“No, no, it's my fault!” Noora said as she knelt on the floor and began to gather her belongings. “Thanks for trying anyway.”

“What are all those books for?” Mara wondered out loud when she grabbed a book with a Spanish title. Mara never learned Spanish. She was more of a science person and took advances biology.

“I'm helping a few friends with their Spanish homework,” she casually answered, shrugging her shoulders and smiling. “We're holding a study group later at the library if you want to join in.”

“Thanks, but I don't do Spanish,” Mara laughed awkwardly.

The girls stood up and Mara helped Noora put the rest of the books in her tote bag.

“Hey, you're Noora, right?”

It was a question of pure formality. She couldn't possibly start a sentence with “You're Noora, my brother's girlfriend,” that would be downright terrifying – at least Mara knew that if anyone tried to use this as a conversation starter, she would run the other way.

“Yes,” she said, clutching against her chest the last couple books that didn't fit in her bag.

“I'm Mara.”

“I know who you are,” she giggled, replacing a strand of hair behind her ear. “I mean, everybody here knows who you are. And William always talks about you.”

“I bet he is,” Mara replied in a snort, trying as best she could to hide her bitterness behind a fake laughter. What a way to give a first impression. “It's weird that we never met before, you two spend so much time together!”

“I thought he didn't want us to meet,” she admitted. “But it was silly, we could have talked anytime without him knowing, at school.”

“Like we're doing right now?”

Could this conversation get any more cringe-worthy?

“I hope he's treating you well,” Mara finally said. “Don't hesitate to put him back in place if he's not.”

There, much better. She was never good at beating around the bush and making polite small talk. Going straight to the point was much more like her modus operandi. By the way Noora's shoulders relaxed it seemed like Mara wasn't just imagining the tense atmosphere.

“Believe me, there's no need to tell me,” she laughed, closing her locker with her elbow and beginning to walk away. But she kept talking, indirectly inviting Mara to tag along. “ If he gets too cocky I call him Wilhelm until he calms down. He hates it!”

“That's a genius move, I might borrow your idea,” Mara happily said and walked alongside the blond girl, until they reached her group of friends.

She was going to leave them alone, but Noora gave her an encouraging look and gestured her to stay and participate in the conversation. Mara was in foreign territory. Was she supposed to say something first? Heck.

“Hi,” she said, shooting all of them a bright smile as if she knew exactly what she was doing. “I'm-”

“William's sister!” A cute blond one said.

Mara didn't know all of their names. She knew about Chris Berg because one day Chris was telling her about how he met his name twin, but he was so hungover from the party that Mara and William didn't believe him until he showed them. She also knew Eva, because she was the one who brought him to the bathroom which led to this encounter. But all the others were just familiar faces whose names she never bothers to learn.

“I'm Vilde,” the said blond added, holding out her hand, as though she wanted to shake hands.

When Mara reached out hesitantly, Vilde enthusiastically grabbed her hand with both of hers and giggled like she just me the Queen.

“It's nice to meet you,” Mara said almost automatically.

All of the other girls introduced themselves and then showered Mara in questions about the Penetrators, as though she was the guardians of their deepest, darkest secrets. Mara didn't tell tale on her friends, but she politely answered the most innocent questions, while trying to avoid those about William. For a while, the girls chatted, forgetting about the time until the bell rang and they all proceeded to gather their bags and coats before heading to class.

“Hey,” Mara called Eva's attention. “I guess I should tell you that Chris is not gay now.”

“What?” She squealed. “Where did you hear that?”

“A while ago I heard you talk about this possibility. I have a good laugh, so thank you for that, but it's not true.”

“What makes you think it's not?” Vilde asked eagerly. It's like she could sense gossip. “We saw Isak make the 'call me' sign to Chris!”

The call me sign, seriously? Mara didn't comment but simply answered.

“I can guarantee you, he's not into guys,” she assured them. By now they were all ogling her like she was talking a very interesting kind of gibberish, that is, with wide eyes but polite restrain.

“Who is he into, then?” Sana asked, rolling her eyes as if she was tired of all this suspense.

“Me.”

Mara saw Vilde's eyes practically pop out of her head, Eva mouth a very articulated 'WHAT' and smiled like the Cheshire Cat. The others seemed either not particularly surprised or downright bored by her answer.

“How long?” Vilde asked. She looked as though she had been betrayed by her gossip digger skills. Like she should have known this.

“A bit less than five months,” Mara answered, now a bit overwhelmed by their reaction.

“That's crazy,” Eva said with her huge smile still plastered on her face. “How can you even deal with him? He's a douche.”

A hundred different answers came to mind at that, but the thing was, Mara couldn't argue with that. Christoffer Schistad was many things, and among those things, there was 'a douche'. He was a filthy heart-thief and home-wrecker, girls manipulator and serial dater, there was no denying it.

“But he's my douche.”

Mara shrugged, and although most of the girls seemed unconvinced, especially Noora – but Mara knew she was a hard core feminist and she understood perfectly that Chris' behavior was going against all her beliefs and moral values – a faint glint in Eva's eyes showed her that at least one of them got it. Eva nodded and smiled kindly. Then they split up and when to class – late.

For the entire afternoon, Mara smiled like a dummy, and didn't pay any attention to her teachers' boring lessons. She went home with a heart so light she feared it would fly away, and by the time she reached Chris' house and stepped in, she was on a literal cloud, it was as though she was gliding on the floor instead of walking.

Yet all this came to a hastening end when she saw the blood staining the otherwise immaculate floor of the hall. Mara never thought that having her heart drop in her stomach or the colors leave her face would be such literal feelings. She followed the drops of red with a knot in her stomach, feeling increasingly ill.

“Chris?” She croaked out, finally spotting his huddled figure on the ground, leaning against the back of the couch.

Both her hands shot up to cover her mouth as she saw his bloodied, battered face, covered in fresh wounds layering the old ones. She dropped to the ground, falling right on her knees. Her brain vaguely processed the physical pain, because her heart ache was so great at this sight, that any other kind of pain was barely worth acknowledging.

“Chris...”

 


	15. Chapter 15

“Chris?” She croaked out, finally spotting his huddled figure on the ground, leaning against the back of the couch.

Both her hands shot up to cover her mouth as she saw his bloodied, battered face, covered in fresh wounds layering the old ones. She dropped to the ground, falling right on her knees. Her brain vaguely processed the physical pain, because her heart ache was so great at this sight, that any other kind of pain was barely worth acknowledging.

“Chris...” Mara cried out, reaching out a hand to touch him but he seemed to be hurt all over and she feared she would hurt him by a simple touch. “W-what happened?”

“Can't you guess?” He replied in a raspy voice, as though the words were physically painful to say. He didn't mean for it to come out so harsh, Mara knew it.

“This cannot go on any longer,” she said, sitting down next to Chris on the tiles. “You've been hurt too much already, I can't keep bandaging you up.”

The underlying fact that she was talking about his physical injuries as well as the emotional ones didn't go unnoticed, and Chris snorted but it resulted in a hoarse cough. God, he was in bad shape.

“Where are you hurt?” Mara asked with a tremor in her voice. She wanted to help him get up without touching any sensitive area.

“Ribs,” he said, and when Mara looked at him intently, wanting for him to continue, he added, “left knee and hand.”

“You're killing me, you know that right? I thought my heart had stopped beating when I saw the blood you left in the hallway. Is it from the nosebleed?”

Chris apologized with a simple sorry gaze and although one of his eyes was half closed, he still directed his look at her with a great intensity. An intensity that made some people uncomfortable and that rarely anyone achieved. It was one of those unique features about him – his intensity. Chris was a ride or die person, it was common knowledge.

Instead of answering verbally he simply shook his head and opened his left hand, holding it palm upward for Mara to see the gash running across it. When he saw the tears prickling her eyes he closed it again.

For a long while, they stayed on the floor, because Chris was exhausted and too sore to even think about moving without any help, and Mara didn't trust her legs not to give way or her tears to spill over. At first she couldn't even meet her boyfriend's eyes – she felt so fucking guilty. None of this would have happened if she didn't insist on starting this.

But _this_ was not some trivial little thing, it was their relationship. A relationship of five months – soon – and they both cherished it dearly. It must have been Chris' longest relationship, though she wouldn't bet her life on it – it was difficult keeping track of Chris' girlfriends. Still, it was too long to simply pretend nothing happened, beg Will's forgiveness and never look in each other's direction ever again. The sheer thought was ridiculous! Even after barely two weeks of being with Chris, Mara wouldn't have given up on him.

At some point her eyes trained back on him, in a caring, sick worried gaze, almost like she _had_ to make sure his chest was still steadily moving along his breathing.

“Mara?” Chris eventually asked, seemingly having recovered his normal voice – at least it didn't sound so weak anymore.

“Yes?” She answered in a whisper.

It was her turn to loose her voice. She couldn't take this distance anymore and shifted closer to him, cradling him against her as best she could without applying pressure on his bruises and wounds. He easily gave in and allowed her to hold him in her arms, his head resting in the crook her of neck while her hands combed his hair in the most soothing manner.

“Say something please,” he requested.

“Can't deal with a bit of silence?” She asked. “I think it's nice to be quiet.”

“It's not that. I just like to hear your voice,” Chris mumbled, closing his eyes as though he was about to doze off.

“Hey! Don't fall asleep on me! Chris!” Mara began to panic. “Don't make me slap you awake!”

“I'm not asleep, my eye hurts!” He complained. “Please, just- talk to me.”

“I don't know what to say, I'm still pondering whether I should cry or scream at you!” Mara exclaimed. “Why on earth did you get in another fight?! You haven't even healed from last week's fight! I haven't!” Mara kept rambling, feeling herself going slightly hysteric. She took a deep breath and resumed on a much calmer tone. “And I'm not talking about the cut on my cheek. One last night I had a nightmare about the Yakuza, and here you are, covered in more bruises I can count, because- because-”

“Don't,” Chris said, switching positions with Mara and returning her attentive gestures toward him. “Don't cry, please. I- I can't bear to watch you cry because of me.”

“I'm not crying,” Mara assured him, wiping away what few tears escaped. “I'm fucking furious in case you haven't noticed.”

“And you're an angry crier,” he chuckled lowly.

They laughed, although halfheartedly, and Mara rose to her feet before gesturing Chris to do the same. She helped him up and let him lean on her as they stumbled through the house and to the enormous bathroom. Mara has never been the cozy care taker kind of gal, she was born a princess and always acted like one. It was completely new for her to have to tend to someone else, to look after someone, to worry. William was a calm kid, if anything, he was the one worried sick about her shenanigans. Yet it seemed uncharacteristically natural to be with Chris and deal with his own reckless behavior. She turned on the tap of the bathtub and drew him a bath, letting the water run as she cleaned his face and checked his various other wounds.

“Tell me William isn't involved in this. If he is, I swear I-”

“He is involved, sort of. But so are all the other guys; it was a Penetrators thing.”

“Is he out of his mind?! He dragged you in a fist fight despite the fact that you were already injured?! There's no way I can look past this, I'm gonna destroy h-”

“He didn't _drag_ me,” Chris protested. “I refuse to be left out of things! William can deny me all he wants but not this! I'm part of the group as much as all the others.”

“I know!” Mara threw yet another cotton ball stained with blood in the trash. “Then give me one good reason you'd want to pick a fight with the Yakuza!”

“I can't just step out because I have a little bruise on my face,” he tried to explain. “I'm either part of the group or I'm not, I can't-”

“Yes you fucking can!” Mara smacked him upside the head, although it was hard for her to further hurt him, she needed to knock some sense in Christoffer's thick head. “What are you trying to do? You have nothing to prove, for hell's sake!”

“Yes I have!” Chris burst with anger. “Of course I have to prove something! Do you think I'll just sit idly by and wait for William to come around and talk to me again? That's what _you do_ , but it's not like you have anything to worry about he's you're fucking big brother, he'll eventually stop sulking and everything will be back to normal!”

“Chris, I-”

“He's my best friend! Do you understand? He trusted me and I betrayed that trust, what on earth would make him forgive me if I don't prove myself worthy of that forgiveness?!” Chris kept on shouting, aggressively shoving the first aid kit on the white tiles of the bathroom in a loud clatter.

“He'll forgive you too, Chris. You're as dear to W-”

“How can you even believe what you're saying, Mara?” He asked her in a snarl. “Do you serious think we can wait this one out?”

“I get it, alright?! We fucked up, I know. We should have told him from the beginning,” Mara answered, raising her voice to match the volume of Chris'.

No way she would stand there and be yelled at, despite doing nothing wrong. Chris was understandably upset and angry, but there was no reason for him to attack her like that, she did nothing but tend to him.

“No, you don't _get it_! You don't because you have the absolute certainty that William will stop being a dick head and soon you'll be able to move back into the apartment and everything will be forgotten!”

“For fuck's sake, don't be such a whiny piss baby! Can't you make a decision that's not directly meant to please Will? You're not his flipping lapdog!”

Now both of them were fuming. The atmosphere in the bathroom was so tense the air was sizzling around them, despite the insane proportions of the room. Mara stood pridefully and raised her chin in defiance, not caring about being shorter, smaller, generally more vulnerable and prone to cry when she was upset. She could see the way Chris' right eye twitched in anger, and the vein on his temple pulsed fast.

“That's not the problem, fucking hell!” He screamed at no one in particular, running his uninjured hand through his hair – a sign Mara recognized as being an indicator of frustration. “I don't live solely for him, how can you even say that? Do you think I would have risked our friendship for you if I didn't value you as much as him? But that doesn't mean that I want to replace him with you! I don't want to have to choose!” Just when Mara was about to settle down and promise him that it was never meant to be like this, that she would never make him choose, he cut her off. “Besides, you still have all your girl friends to vent to about this brain melting thing if it gets too much! What am _I_ supposed to do? All the guys would throw themselves in front of a bullet for Will and my best friend is precisely the one who's mad at me – for dating _his sister_!”

Mara took this remark especially badly, because the jerk knew she didn't have many friends. She mostly hung out by herself, with Chris, Will and the Penetrators, or sometimes with people from her year, but never the same people.

“Self-pity doesn't suit you at all, you know? That was a low blow, even from you Chris! You know full well that I have much fewer friends than you, and claiming that you have it worse than worse than I is really shitty!”

“Who are you even trying to fool! Just today I saw you laugh with Noora and her friends! Quantity is not quality, I'm sure you have friends you can share anything with! Everyone has a best friend!” He objected, trying to make a point, but missing it.

“Yes! _You_ , you idiot!” Mara yelled, brought to tears by this conversation.

She was tired of fighting, with Chris especially. She considered apologizing and starting it all over, but then he huffed in what she could only call disdain and it was it. Mara spun around, turned off the tap, told Chris to stick it and take his fucking bath on his own – what did she even care?

The entire evening was spent in silence. Not the silence they were used to, not the silence that meant neither of the spoke but the TV or the music was on. No, it was thick, uncomfortable and deafening silence that gave an eery feeling to the house. Mara was on edge from the moment she heard Chris leave the bathroom and lock himself in his bedroom – not literally lock the door, but just close it to signify her to keep away.

She was stuck having to choose between going back to her apartment to sleep in her own room, although that implied having to deal with her brother's sullen muteness, or she could stay and deal with her mad boyfriend. The choice would be much easier if only she knew what she could say to either of them to make them stop behaving like spoiled brats and suck it up. Couldn't they act their age for once? Why did Mara, the youngest of them three, always have to be the adult? It was getting old – no pun intended.

In the end she chose the latter, for strictly practical reasons. She found herself hesitating before the door to Chris' bedroom, but eventually she opened it.

“Are you giving me the silent treatment?” Mara asked after waiting a minute or so for Chris to look at her, after several attempts to catch his attention, unsuccessfully.

He didn't reply, which was a statement in itself.

“Chris, I would never put you in a position that would force you to choose between William and I.”

“Just leave me alone Mara. Find a spare room or go home,” he sighed, still not gracing her with so much as a look.

That one sentence hurt more than words could possibly express, but Mara gulped down and held it together until she grabbed the shirt Chris had given her so she would have something to sleep in during her stay, closed the door, walked down the hallway to the spare room that was the farthest from Chris' room and then only did she allow the whimpers to tumble from her lips. The tears she had been holding back so long slipped over in a waterfall, rolling down her cheeks and wetting her shirt.

It took her a long time to fall asleep because she felt completely helpless and furious, because the two people she loved most in the world were mad at her, and she felt desperately lonely in this huge, sterile room. All she seemed to be able to do these days was to ruin all her relationships, with everyone.

At first she fought against sleep, as if by depriving herself of sleep and punishing herself, she would find some solace. But there came a time when her eyelids felt heavy and she grew tired from all the emotions of the day, so she closed her eyes, long past midnight.

When she woke up the next morning, she felt the familiar weigh of an arm resting across her stomach. Surprised, she instantly turned around in Chris' arms, finding herself face to face with a sleepy but awake Christoffer. He too looked like he hasn't had the best of nights, but he smiled faintly, and gave her his charming little smirk. This was his way of apologizing.

It wasn't nearly enough, but for this time of day, it would do. Without any further ado, Chris nuzzled her neck, burying his face in the crook where her neck met her shoulder and peppered kisses here and there, until Mara gave in to the smile threatening to split her face and giggled lightly.

 


	16. Chapter 16

They thought the radio silence was bad, but neither of them expected the sudden wave of texts that blew up their phones to be even worse. It started around noon and the flow of messages and missed calls from William stayed steady until the unexpected happened and Mara snapped. Bottling up feelings is not good for you they say. Everything will come out all at once they say. Well they are right, and Mara has bottled up so much rage and exhaustion.

But we're getting a little ahead of ourselves here. First things first: they woke up, stayed in bed for a while, and had slow, lazy morning sex to seal their reconciliation.

Chris had started strewing kisses along Mara's jawline, earning soft moans and groans with each new one. She could feel his smile against her skin, and upon seeing her positive response to his advances he sneaked a hand under her shirt to grab a handful of her.

It honestly didn't matter where he put his hands because Mara was all delicious soft curves and warm tender skin. When she reached out for him neck and pulled him a little closer so she could end her torture and kiss him, she noticed Chris held his breath a millisecond before their lips connected. She wanted to be rough, she wanted to show him that she was still holding grudge against him for being a dick yesterday but that she also needed him right now. However Chris was in too poor a state to be handled in any other way than gently. He had washed away the blood but it only made his wounds more visible.

There was a huge bruise on his right cheekbone, which was most likely fractured, a gash ran from his temple to his hairline, but ti wasn't deep, it looked more like a scratch. Part of his left eyebrow was gone and a crust of blood replaced the extremity of it. A faint bruise was forming on his chin, as if someone punch him in the jaw from below.

For all these reasons, and despite it being widely out of character, whatever anger was left from yesterday's outburst vanished. Mara brushed Chris' hair out of his face to better look at him and the little smile along with the crinkles at the corner of his eyes finished to make her forgive him. For now. She could always get back at him when he's back in shape.

Mara took matters into her own hands this morning and demanded Chris stayed still and enjoyed the show while she stripped them of their clothes. The way he bit down on his lower lip and lustfully looked at her while she straddled him and rode him was a good enough indication that he was enjoying himself despite not being used to being inactive during sex.

“How do you like being bottom?” She smirked as she pulled him behind her and out of the guest room they had slept in.

“Not as boring as I thought it would be,” he admitted, shrugging faintly. “Mara, I swear if you tell anyone you pinned me into the mattress, I'll sex starve you.”

“Sex starve me?” She scoffed, unimpressed and not feeling threatened in the slightest. “That the best you got? You'll be the first one to give in!”

“Is that so? You think I have so little willpower?” He asked in a low chuckle as they entered the kitchen. “You'll be begging me before you know it.”

“Is it a challenge?” Mara asked, ready to accept it.

She was only joking, but that Chris didn't need to know, she just wanted to see him freak out when he realizes he fucked up and might be sex deprived for god knows how long because of a little too much teasing. The look of sudden panic in his eyes was priceless. Mara laughed, thus putting an end to his fright.

“Kiddin',” she said. “Proving you wrong is not worth denying myself some,” Mara laughed.

The whole morning they acted as if nothing had happened at all – they weren't in denial and knew they would have to talk about it, but for now, they needed a moment of carelessness and joyful teasing and bickering, no matter how domestic it felt. Mara forbade Chris from handling anything sharp on the ground that he was a masochistic ass who felt the constant need to endanger himself and that she wouldn't allow him near a knife until he was fully healed. Then she stopped him from leaving the house when he tried to go to class. _Go to class_ , can you believe that? The dude had his face broken, there wasn't a more legitimate reason to miss a few days of school that this one, and he wanted to go. The Yakuza must have hit him on the head too - and harder than she thought.

“No way!” Mara stood between Chris and the door, one hand each side of the wall to prevent his passage. “You're staying here, I'm not letting you out of my sight!”

“C'mon, Mara!” He groaned. “Don't be fucking dramatic, I'm _fine_! Look at me!”

“That's not an argument Chris, you always look fine as hell,” she snickered, hoping flattery would help her win this argument. “But you're not, and if the teachers see you in this state, they'll call you dad.”

She didn't know which of her arguments put an end to his obstinate insistence, but Chris dropped his backpack on the ground.

“You know, if I wanted a babysitter, I would've chosen another girlfriend than you,” he replied.

“Too bad you're stuck with me now, huh?” Mara laughed, not even considering he could be serious. He was just a sore loser – like her.

Chris wrapped an arm around her frame and pulled her to his side as he said, “No idea how I deal with you.”

It was a chaotic kind of happiness they felt this morning – a mixture of relief because their argument could have had worse consequences than simple bickering with a dash of sulking, and of apprehension of what might happen _now_.

Their postponed conversation was triggered by the sudden and simultaneous buzzing of both their phones. When they pick them up to check who on earth could text them both, their reaction was nothing short of pure shock.

“William,” Chris said, gulping down and setting his phone back on the table, screen down.

He sent: **Call me**.

“Yes, William,” Mara replied. “And... Noora?” She said.

A little notification told her she had added on as a friend on facebook. Mara accepted the friendship request and suddenly, she saw her typing a message.

“We're not answering,” Chis stated, his decision final. Mara didn't say anything. She wanted to answer to her brother if only out of curiosity, but her pride – and Chris apparently – stood in the way.

“She's still typing-” Mara informed Chris, with a frown on her face.

He huffed and got off his chair, walking around the table to lean over Mara's shoulder and see what William's girlfriend had to say.

“Since when are you friends with her?” Chris asked while both of them contemplated the three little dots at the bottom on the screen.

“I'm- not really-” Mara hesitated. “We just talked yesterday, and then she introduced me to her friends. But I guess we've known each other for a while, indirectly.”

As his sister and girlfriend, they frequently heard him talk about each of them. It was like a friend by proxy, in a sense.

“You think William has told her about you and I?” He asked her.

“I told her,” Mara answered. “I mean, I told her we were dating – to silence the rumor about you being gay,” she laughed. “She seemed surprised though, so I'm guessing Will _forgot_ to tell her.”

“Bragging about it already?” One of his eyebrows went up and he smirked down at her.

“You wish!”

Then Noora's message showed up in a little 'ding'. It said: **I hope you and P-Chris are okay. Haven't seen you today and all the Penetrators showed up with bruises this morning. Nobody's heard from you, people are worried**.

Another 'ding' was heard and a second message bubble appeared. **And by 'people' I mean the girls and I**.

“Looks like you have more friends than you thought,” Chris said distractedly, still frowning at the messages. “See, they all went to school!”

“How many of them bled all over their floor after the fight though?” Mara asked purely rhetorically, clicking her tongue inside her cheek. “I'm keeping you locked in here whether you want it or not, at least until the end of the week.”

It was Wednesday. Chris groaned, but he knew better than to argue. He grabbed a chair and sat next to Mara, bringing the chair closer to hers in order to see her phone too. His phone began to buzz.

“Incoming call,” he told her, not even looking at his phone. The personalized ring tone told him it was William. “What are you going to tell her?”

“The truth?” She said it like a question.

The two of them looked at each other for a few seconds and silently agreed on that. They were done with lies.

**Hi! No need to worry, we're fine. Chris came home in pretty bad shape yesterday, he needs a few days to recover. You'll see us Monday, lookin' fresh and good!**

“Now that's a little optimistic, even _your_ black eye hasn't faded yet,” Chris commented after reading the message Mara has typed.

“That's not the point, I don't want her to anyone else to worry and talk about us more than they already do,” she sighed, putting the phone down after hitting send. “If we had gone today, we would have been a freak show.”

“We would have been fucking heroes!” Chris protested. “We both still carry the scars the Yakuza gave us, but we kicked their asses. The boys talk about you, you know? They don't like it when strangers beat up one of theirs, especially not a girl.”

“That's sexist,” Mara said. “But I guess I understand your point. Do you want to be seen as a hero?”

It was a serious question, one that deserved a minute of pondering, but Chris already knew the answer.

“Not particularly, right?” Mara asked with an affectionate smile. She knew him. Chris was no hero. He wasn't Superman – rather Batman, working in the dark, asking no reward for his good deeds, that is, when he did one.

“I just want to be left alone.” He shrugged and looked away. Getting the hint, Mara dropped the subject.

 **Alright, take care :) Tell me if you need anything. Btw William seems worried, I think you should call him.** Noora sent.

“Fuck,” Mara swore. “I knew this couldn't be a coincidence.”

“What?” Chris questioned, leaning back on the table, his elbow against hers.

“That Noora and William write us at the same time! They're probably together right now, he must have asked her to talk to me since neither of us answer his texts – I've gotten four more since the first one.”

“I don't think that's Noora's style,” Chris said, shaking his head. “You should have seen how she put William back in his place when he disrespected her blond friend. She's taken feminism to a new level, I'm positive she's not texting you on his behalf and showing him your answers.”

“A hundred percent sure?” She asked giving him a pointed look.

“Certain,” Chris assured her.

“Alright. Then it's just a weird coincidence. It's noon, they are both having lunch, and they decided it was time to check on us.”

“That's- plausible, but still weird,” Chris frowned as though something was bothering him. “Will has been acting extra-petty yesterday, why would he want to reach us today? Why both of us?”

“Because he knows we're together, so reaching one of us means reaching the other too,” Mara pointed out logically. “But it doesn't answer the first question.”

No, it didn't, and Mara and Chris decided to leave the brain-melting issue aside and enjoy their day, because they have damn well deserved it. All the while, their phones regularly buzzed, either because of a text or an incoming call, and all were from William. It was only fair that after days and days of being ignored they paid him back his own coin.

Neither Chris nor Mara were magnanimous enough to feel guilty about it, and they were sore losers who tended to undermine their opponent's victory in case they lost. Which didn't happened very often, but in this case, they felt like they were the losers. William could stick it, because if he thought that calling them insistently one after the other would be enough to get a reaction out of them, he was gravely mistaken, and needed to think again.

Which he did, apparently, because around 6pm the doorbell rang, and while Chris had dozed off on the couch in front of a movie, Mara stood up and opened it.

William stood there, hands in his pockets, looking exactly the same as the last time they talked, that is: without a single bruise, completely normal, and as though he hadn't turned their whole world upside down by turning his back on his best friend and his sister.

Mara punched him right in the face.

 

 


	17. Chapter 17

Mara punched him right in the face. William, who was taller than her, didn't suffer too much from this blow, but he still stumbled back from the surprise. She hadn't hit as hard as she would have but he still held his bleeding nose. Nothing was broken though.

“How dare you come here?!” She screamed at him, after making sure the door was closed behind her.

“I needed to talk to you!” He explained, leaning his head back and pinching his nose.

Mara wanted to tell him that it would only make the blood flow more intense but she bit her tongue. He could damn well bleed out of the porch.

“Yeah well thanks, I know that, I think we got it from your first text, and the hundred others that followed!” She snickered in conceit. “Are you this dense, Will? If we wanted to speak to you, don't you think we would have picked up our phone?!”

“That's irrelevant, there is something I _need_ to tell you,” he said, pushing her argument aside with a gesture of the hand as though it was of no importance at all.

“I'm way past caring what you have to say or what you do! Just leave us alone!” Mara screamed, feeling angry tears blur her vision but quickly blinking them back.

“You care enough to talk about me with Noora though,” William pointed out, a confident smirk growing on his lips.

“Ditto brother, apparently you still feel entitled to monitor what I do even when you're too stubborn to even talk to me face to face for a week straight,” Mara scoffed.

If he imagined for so much as a second that he could show up at Chris' door and crack a joke and that it would be enough to forgive and forget everything, he had to think again.

“What's the miserable excuse you've come up with to justify your behavior, huh? I'm curious tell me,” Mara laughed a bitter laugh, making herself cringe. “No actually I don't want to know, just get the fuck away from me! I can't believe you have the nerve to show yourself after what you did yesterday!”

“Mara, I-” he started but she cut him off.

“I don't give a fuck, Will! I've been trying to talk to you for days and you've ignored me, now you'll just have to suck it up and listen to me, because _I am not listening to you,_ ” she articulated exaggeratedly slowly. “It was beneath you to drag Chris into a fight after what happened last week. He's _still_ hurt. When I came home from school, I saw him curled up on the floor, bleeding – do you have the slightest idea how frightened I was? Of course you don't, because you don't give a shit anymore! About me or you best friend!”

“It's not-” he tried to talk to her yet again, but Mara's hands flew up to her hair in an irritated gesture and she had to look away from him.

She couldn't stand the way he looked at her, it was too close to the affectionate Will she was used to. He overstepped his boundaries and needed to face the consequences of his actions, Mara couldn't give in just because she was weak and wanted her brother back.

“If you want to talk to Chris, you'll have to wait for Monday to come around,” she finally said when she settled down. “I'm not letting you anywhere near him until he feels better.”

She saw the way his lips parted to say something, but nothing ever came out.

“You know, soon it'll be too late to mend the broken pieces of our relationships. If you don't get your shit together, it'll all go to waste,” she told him in a final attempt to make him realize he was a huge dickhead for the entire past week. “You have some serious apologizing to do, but today's not the right day.”

With that said, Mara turned around and left a speech William standing on the porch as she went back inside, and as soon as the door was closed, she let out the worst, most pathetic whimper. With a hand covering her mouth, she began to cry, allowing herself a moment of weakness and sliding down the door until she hit the cold tiles of the floor.

That was the position in which Chris found her when he heard her muffled weeps.

 

*

 

Monday rolled around sooner than either of them would have expected. At first Chris was enraged that William came to his house and made Mara cry, he even planned on going to his apartment to give him a piece of his mind, but then Mara told him she had punched him and he agreed that it was enough punishment for a day.

But if there was one thing he agreed on even more than that, it was that there had been way too much punching going on for the last weeks. It was inadmissible and it had to stop immediately.

Mara took Noora at face value and asked her if she could keep her updated about what was going on at Nissen, and she also asked one of her classmates to send Mara the homework to do for next week. Apparently the Penetrators had won a battle that day when Mara found Chris bloodied, because the rumors was that the Yakuza gave up on trying to become the dominant Russ crew – thus putting an end to this idiotic pissing contest that had been going on for about as long as the two groups existed.

When she told Chris, he complained about not being there to hear it himself. But he also rejoiced in being home for a while, despite the vehement protesting at the beginning of his forced vacation. Mara would go as far as to say he apprehended going back when the alarm clock rang Monday morning.

“Fuck!” He swore, slamming his hand on the beeping machine to shut it up. “Back to hell.”

Mara answered with an unintelligible groan and rolled back around to bury her face in the pillow. No she really wasn't a morning person. Her black eye was gone now, and she looked as fine as ever – although she was running out of clothes and will probably have to make a detour by the apartment tonight.

The cold hit her body and Mara's head flew up, only to see that the sheets had been torn off her.

“Hey!”

“No time to fall back asleep,” Chris told her. “Get your cute little ass out of my bed!”

“That's not what you said last night,” she flirted through her sleepiness.

Chris rolled his eyes at her and told her to hurry as she stretched her tired limbs. Her body went on autopilot and she stood up, showered and got dressed in a state of half-sleep, like a robot. She met Chris downstairs and he placed a steaming cup of coffee on the counter for her. Everybody who spent a little time with Mara knew there was nothing to get out of her before her cup of coffee.

“Alright, I'm awake,” she declared proudly, smiling giddily as she gulped down half her coffee.

“You're a fippin' mess,” Chris teased her, handing over the box of cereals.

Mara grabbed a bowl and a spoon and poured herself some cereals. Will and Chris always made fun of her because she didn't put milk in her cereals, but she liked them extra crunchy not at all pasty. Under her boyfriend's judgmental scrutiny, she ate her breakfast, provokingly glancing his way every now and then as if to challenge him to say anything, but he kept quiet and simply smiled in his cup of coffee.

She was so exhausted she could sleep standing up. During the last few days she didn't sleep much, or well. Her mind was constantly busy replaying the scene between William and her, and she made sure Chris was sleeping because he was the one who needed most a good night sleep, not her.

“Hey! Mara!” Chris snapped his fingers before hers eyes. “Don't fall asleep on me like that.”

“I'm _awake_ ” she told him as she shoved his hand away from her face. “I was thinking.”

“Well stop.” He shrugged.

“You don't even know what I was thinking about!”

“Whatever it was, it must be some brain melting thing you've been over-thinking, so stop anyway,” he insisted. “It's hot when a girl has the brains _and_ the good looks, but don't push it too far.”

“How do you manage to turn a compliment into something akin to an insult so easily?” She frowned in concentration as if she was really putting some thought in it.

“Years of practice, and I'm a natural born irritating person.”

“No truer words have ever been spoken,” Mara sassed him before leaning in for a kiss. “Have you seen the time? We have have to go or we'll be late,” she said when she noticed the microwave clock.

Mara downed her cup of coffee and ran to Chris' room to get her bag, threw on her coat and grabbed her shoes on her way out. Chris, ever the charmer, held the front door open until she entered the hallway, and then closed it right to her nose, earning a string of profanities and threats that she would never put into action. He seemed very pleased with himself and barely managed to suppress his smile when Mara opened the passenger door of his car and hopped in, her shoes still in her hands.

 

*

 

“No offense, but you look like a mess.”

That was how she was greeted by Sana, who harbored a soft but teasing smile on her red painted lips.

“So I've been told,” Mara sighed dramatically and shut her locker close.

“Noora and Eva haven't stopped asking around if anyone knew what happened to you and Chris, they were worried beyond reason and you come back looking like you haven't had any shut eye in a week,” she said, her tone clearly full of reproach and slightly scolding.

“I'm sorry, why are you here telling me I look like shit?” Mara frowned.

Sana wasn't with the girls, she came straight for her and dragged her. Mara respected that but didn't enjoy being on the wrong end of the dragging.

“I thought I should tell you now, before the girls come.” She was awfully serious all of a sudden. “While you were gone there was some drama going on. P-Chris' ex, the second year girl-” she trailed off, waiting for Mara to fill in the blank.

“Iben?” She asked.

What did Iben have to do with this? She wasn't the most mature person Mara knew but she was friendly enough and she wasn't bitter about her breakup with Chris. Though Mara hadn't talked to her since Chris and her became public. Sana had her full attention.

“Yes, Iben, when she saw that the Penetrators were all hurt and Chris was nowhere to be seen, she flipped. There was a nasty cat fight between her, another girl who slept with Chris at a party and Eva who overheard them talk about you and Chris and tried to defend you.”

“Wait, wait, what exactly are you trying to tell me?” Mara tried to sort out all the information Sana threw at her.

“Iben was a little too concerned about a boy who wasn't her boyfriend anymore, and she was going on about how she made a mistake, that she never should have dumped him and that she'd get him back,” Sana said with an apologetic wince. “Eva told her that she would regret it all of her life if she did this to you, but she said you weren't her friend, and that Chris clearly didn't like you at all since he hid you all this time.”

“I'm going to rip-” Mara began to profess a threat but the girls walked round the corner and walked toward them. “Thanks for telling me. I'll deal with it.”

“Wait, it's not over,” Sana grabbed her by the elbow when she was going to meet the girls halfway. “The person who put an end to the fight- it was William.”

“Wil- _what_?” Mara asked in confusion.

Sana simply shrugged, showing her that it was all the information she could gather. Then the girls greeted each other and soon Noora and Eva were standing each side of Mara, asking her questions and showing concern like no one had before.

Mara spent the whole morning worrying about Iben, looking at her in class instead of concentrating – although it was math and she was already too chapters ahead of the program. Sana's words played over again in her again like a distant echo haunting her every thought. She wasn't actually worried about Chris turning on her and going back to Iben, but since she heard what Sana told her “she said you weren't her friend”, Mara felt her heart clench in her chest and she was feeling a little sick. It shouldn't have been a surprise to her, but it still hurt to know that she was categorized as a mere classmate, an acquaintance Iben didn't owe anything.

And that last part about William putting an end to their cat fight. What did he do exactly? Maybe he saw a bunch of girls showing their teeth and stepped in to avoid further drama? Or – she barely allowed herself to think about this – did he hear her talk about stealing his sister's boyfriend and defend her? That was the kind of thing she would have expected William to do before all of this. That was the most plausible explanation, since he usually didn't care about girls' drama, he stayed out of it when he could. The whirlpool of thoughts in her head made her dizzy and confused.

Lunch break couldn't come any slower. She counted every damn minute until the clock hit the big twelve and practically flew off her chair and out of the room to go to the cafeteria. Chris had told her he would keep her a seat since he didn't have class the hour before, but ten minutes in, Mara was still pointlessly looking around and finding no one. She eventually gave up and sat with the girls who waved at her to come over.

Mara swore they had fun but she only paid half a mind the conversation, and twenty more minutes passed before the obvious hit her in the face. It wasn't just Chris missing. It was all the Penetrators. Suddenly worried out of her mind, she got up, leaving her trail of untouched food behind and went out. She ran around the entire school until she found them, all gathered around behind the school. She vaguely saw William stand out of the crowd since he was taller than the rest, and the familiar undercut of her boyfriend who aggressively pushed her brother back with two hands. The others seemed ready to intervene if things got out of hand, but Mara wanted to scream nonetheless.

Not even a day could pass by without a fight. And she was fucking done with it. It made her sick. Sick to the stomach, and her vision- her vision got blurry. Was she crying? Her hand rose to her cheek and wiped it but she felt no tears. What- what was? Her head was spinning a bit and all she could hear where Chris' shouts and then her knees turned into jelly and it felt like the whole of her energy was sucked out of her body.

Mara felt her eyes close, and body limply fall to the ground, she wanted to say something but her body didn't obey anymore and everything happened so quickly. When her head hit the ground, she was out.

 


	18. Chapter 18

The most striking thing Mara noticed when she woke up was that it was dark outside, which immediately led her wonder how long she has been out. She tried moving her head, but a throbbing pain dissuaded her from doing so.

“Argh,” she groaned, and tried to move her hand to her head, but she realized she couldn't move it.

When she finally looked down and her eyes became used to the bright white light, she saw that her hand was trapped. Both her hands were trapped under her boys' head. Chris firmly gripped her right hand and he has fallen asleep on top of their joined hands. A frown twisted his attractive features as though he was having a nightmare. On the other side of her bed was William, who mirrored Chris' position. He was the first to stir and open his eyes.

His head rose up the moment he saw Mara was awake, and she croaked out a little “Sup?”

“Sup?” He asked in bewilderment, as if he couldn't believe the audacity. She had the nerve to pass out and when she woke up all she found to say was 'sup'? “ _Sup_?” He repeated, his voice a little too high.

Mara just smiled and left him to process that she was okay, meanwhile she turned to Chris and slowly slipped his hand out from under his head and gently put her hand on his cheek and stroke it until his eyes fluttered open. He was faster than William and jerked awake, almost jumping off his chair when he saw her looking at him.

“Mara!” He cried out in relief. “Oh my god Mara, are you okay?!” He asked in panic.

“You scared the living shit out of us!” William interjected, drawing the attention back on him.

Mara wanted to laugh out of relief but her head spun a little and William and Chris suddenly began to shower her in questions, and relieves or reproachful comments; they made her swear to never do this ever again and almost drowned her in their overbearing worry, but she was so happy to see them agree on something that she simply smiled.

“Have you been crying?” She cut them off, biting her lower lip and shooting them a 'don't lie to me' look.

“No!”

“Certainly not!”

They answered at the same time, causing a fit of laughter to erupt from Mara and making it difficult even for them not to smile a little bit. The most dreadful part of this day was over. She first turned to her brother and reassured him.

“I'm fine, stop looking at me like I'm about to drop dead,” she playfully scolded him. “Just tell me what happened to me.”

“The doctor said you had a drop in blood pressure,” he explained in a deep sigh. “That's why you collapsed, but then you hit your head on the ground and it knocked you out. You have a concussion, they didn't know when you'd wake up.”

“We were ready to plant our tents here until you wake up,” Chris added.

He still clutched her hand in his like it was his lifeline. Mara squeezed it to show him everything was fine now, and she felt his thumb trace patterns on the back of her hand. He looks so worried, so utterly wrecked by the idea of anything happening to her that she's brought to tears herself. But she blinked them back.

“How long have you been here?” She questioned.

“About four or five hours,” Will answered. “We never left.”

“And you haven't even murdered each other!” She pointed out. “That's progress!”

“Awake for two minutes and already making bad jokes,” Chris chuckled. “I'm gonna go tell the nurse you're back with the living.”

Chris left the room. It was an excuse, he just wanted to give them time together, he was probably going to buy a coffee before going to find a nurse.

“Mara, I'm so sorry for everything that happened these last weeks, I've been a complete idiot and I handled this in the worst possible way, but I swear I didn't mean to hurt you, or Chris,” William blurted out as soon as his friend stepped out of the door. “W-what happened, Mara?”

“I don't know what happened, I just- it's so blurry in my head, and I have a massive headache, worse than the hangover from last year's New Year party,” she groaned, this time free to place a cold hand against her temple to sooth her pain.

Geez, she hoped Chris wouldn't take too long to call a nurse, because she need some pain killers as soon as possible.

“Yeah I can't imagine what it feels like to hit your head on the concrete floor,” he snickered. It was the kind of uncomfortable laughter which was somewhere between joy and emotional breakdown. “Shit, I thought you were dead for a sec'. And Chris was even worse than me, he didn't let anyone approach from you until the ambulance arrived, he kept checking to make sure you were still breathing.”

“Worried about him?” Mara asked.

“I think we were both way past worry,” he scoffed. “He kept asking to no on in particular 'can a healthy young girl just drop dead?!' and he screamed at the guys who asked questions he didn't have answers to.”

The truth was that Christoffer's own heartbeat was so fast and loud he couldn't even properly take her pulse. This was a kind of panic he has never experienced before and he wasn't very eager for it to happen again.

“He was furious because I was allowed to get into the ambulance with you and not him. They only let family come. But he jumped in his car and followed us to the hospital and he hasn't moved since.”

“It almost sounds like you're defending him now, what did I miss? Have you bonded over my unconscious body?” She asked in complete astonishment.

William chuckled, disregarding his sister's cringe-worthy humor, and proceeded to explain. The good thing was that after about forty minutes of throwing the blame on each other, they finally began to see that they were both a bit responsible for what happened, and they talked most of it out, at least, they weren't going to jump on each other throat for Mara's sake.

“Besides,” he added. “There's something else I need to tell you- about Chris... and you,” he said uncomfortably.

Mara raised an eyebrow to show that she wasn't satisfied with the outcome of this conversation.

“Will... I'm only telling you this because I want you to understand once and for all that we're not fooling around just to mess with you. I'm in love with Chris, and no amount of sulking on your part is going to change this. Do yourself a favor and stop acting like a baby. He's your best friend, and you're his. You miss each other, I know it, just like I miss spending time with you two, _together_.”

William opened his mouth to answer but someone cleared their throat and Mara and Will turned to the door. It stood half open and Chris leaned against the door frame, staring at his feet and trying to conceal the smirk growing on his face. He knocked against the wooden door frame.

“I- ugh, I brought the nurse,” he said with a hint of a grin on his face.

A middle aged woman walked in confidently, with a board and papers. She smiled kindly.

“Why hello there, Mara... Magnusson?” She asked, reading the papers. “How are you feeling?”

She proceeded to examine her while Mara explained that she was fine apart from her headache, but the woman said it was normal and that it should go away in a few hours.

“We're going to keep you here until morning, and if you're feeling good then you can go home. But not on your own,” she added to the two boys who assured her Mara would be looked after. She then proceeded to give her pain killers.

“What triggered my blood pressure drop?” Mara asked.

“It can have many reasons, like sleep deprivation, high level of stress, prolonged negative feelings like anger, frustration or disappointment. If you're not eating enough or overworking yourself it can play a role too,” she explained. “Feels familiar?” She asked.

A round of agreement from the three teenagers answered her and she smiled fondly.

“It's gonna be alright. Whatever happened, you can work it out now. You gave them a fright you know?” She giggled, pointing to Will and Chris with her chin.

The meds were kicking in, Mara could feel it.

“I'll leave you now. You two should go home, she's going to fall asleep as soon as the painkillers kick in. I'll call you when she wakes up in the morning,” she informed them.

But not even a tornado could have moved them, they would not leave Mara, even for a second. The nurse left after making sure Mara was alright, and Chris sat back down on his chair.

“I'll grab a coffee, I'll need it if we're going to stay here all night,” William said.

Someone has to tell these boys that they suck at making discrete exits, Mara had rarely seen anything lacking in subtlety as much as their dumb excuses to leave the room.

“You guys are so subtle!” Mara teased Chris, who winced a little.

“Yeah, talking about subtlety, I never had a girl faint to get my attention, it was a little dramatic don't you agree?” He asked, leaning in and placing a kiss in her palm. He felt the urge to kiss every last inch of her body now that he knew she was fine.

“If you want to say something say it now because I can feel my eyelids getting heavier by the second,” Mara murmured tiredly. “I've never been high before, but that must be how it feels like,” she giggled.

“I don't know, I'm still recovering from hearing you tell your brother to stick it and that you loved me,” he sniggered in a mixture of unease and happiness. That was a foreign feeling. “Do you?” He asked Mara, swallowing down thickly.

“Ask me again when I'm off the morphine,” Mara requested, barely whispering and feeling her eyes close by themselves. “I'm glad- I'm... glad- you and- Will...” she tried to say something before drifting off, but the end of her sentence died down.

William, who has been waiting behind the door for a couple minutes now, finally stepped in.

“You haven't told her?” He asked Chris.

“Nah,” he said, his eyes not leaving Mara's sleeping form. “We can tell her tomorrow.”

Will has brought back two coffees which he set down on the table at the end of the bed. Chris stood up and went to hug his best friend.

“I'm glad to have you back, bro,” Chris said, patting Will's shoulder.

“Me too, man, me too,” Will laughed and returned the hug.

 


	19. Chapter 19

Chris wanted to ask her again if she meant what she told her brother, but the next day everything seemed to move in fast motion from the moment Mara woke up to that when they arrived at the apartment. Not one second of privacy presented itself and Chris was resigned to not get an answer anytime soon since he highly doubted William would leave Mara out of his sight until she was fully recovered.

“I feel great!” She assured them both when they gave her a suspicious look upon hearing her tell the nurse her headache was gone.

So what you have to understand by 'until she was fully recovered' is 'until William decides she's fully recovered'. Chris kept his mouth shut and didn't voice his disagreement with William's way of handling the situation – he couldn't risk causing yet another fight with his best friend right after they reconciled.

The moment Mara sat on the edge of her bed and stood up to go change in the bathroom, William extended his arms for her to lean on him in case she felt dizzy, and Chris repressed a snort when he saw the way she sighed and rolled her eyes at her brother's over protective behavior. She wasn't exactly a cry baby, Mara wasn't one to complain about anything unless it was extremely serious or it was happening to someone she cared about. If Chris gets a split lip it's the end of the world, but she could be coughing up blood and she would still crack a joke and claim everything was peachy. This made her simultaneously brave and unreliable when it came to self-care.

“I don't need you to get dressed,” she huffed and walked past William as though he was merely an annoying child trying to get her attention.

She did look _great_ \- Chris had to give her that – but then again, he always thought she looked great. His state of utter awe of his girlfriend backfired since he didn't decipher the symptoms of her unwellness until it was too late. However, they both went through some tough times and getting up and going to school was the closest they got to being _fine_ in weeks, therefore Chris wasn't being too strict with himself.

Besides, he was still pumped by what he overheard the day before – it kept him awake most of the night – and he couldn't wait to finally have a moment of privacy with Mara to question her about it. Frankly, he couldn't picture Mara saying something like this lightly, which both thrilled him and scared him to fucking death. Somewhere, deep down, he knew that she meant it but he still needed to hear the words from her mouth.

Somehow he thought he was – or became – better at reader her reactions than her very own brother. William disregarded her attempts at doing things by herself and carried her bag, opened the doors for her and even went as far as to fill in her the hospital papers for her – all of which annoyed her to no end. Not that she didn't enjoy the treatment, she merely disapproved the reason behind it.

“I hope you don't think your sudden change of behavior regarding Chris and I will make me forget how much of a douche you've been for the past weeks. Almost two weeks of giving me the cold shoulder won't go away with a little kindness, I demand an explanation and it better be a good one – with introduction, development and conclusion,” Mara warned William who fought back the urge to smile at that and accepted the challenge.

“It's not a joke man,” Chris told him when Mara was out of earshot. “She's pissed, you have no idea.”

William wanted to object that he did have an idea, but even he knew that he couldn't be sure about it and therefore may be wrong. Mara was pissed, that was for sure. The question was: to what extend? She was pretty nice to him yesterday – mainly due to her attempt to sooth his worries and her concussion – but now that she was back in shape, who knew what she would make him endure to redeem himself?

“And you're not?” Will asked eventually, turning to his friend as he signed the papers to leave the hospital – he hated this place.

“Oh I am, believe me. But I'm not nearly as imaginative as her when it comes to finding original ways to punish you for being an ass and hiding stuff from us.” At that, William cocked a brow. “I mean- we did too, but it didn't have any consequences, at least, not like this.”

At that, William looked down at his feet. Mara interrupted their conversation and told them to hurry up, gesturing them to walk faster – she probably hated this place even more than William. Since William came in the ambulance with Mara, the three of them drove back to the siblings' apartment in Chris' car, in an rather awkward silence, until finally they stepped inside and Mara began to blurt out hundreds of questions. Except that William didn't answer any of them until he decided she was safe and sound. Chris played a small role in the whole thing, though Mara still felt like they were being dramatic about the situation. The boys kept looking after her as though she were a poor, fragile little thing that needed to be handled gently and taken care of.

“Guys, would you please stop babysitting me? I'm perfectly fine! If you're just trying to postpone this conversation William, you'r-” Mara began but she was interrupted mid-sentence.

“You hear what the nurse said: you're too stressed. Why don't you just relax for today? We can't still talk about it tomorrow, I'm not going anywhere,” William said in this scolding brotherly tone that caused Mara to once again roll her eyes into the next dimension.

Chris still didn't budge or say anything, but he shot him a surprised glance. Was he chickening out of this? It's not like it could be any worse at this point, Mara's opinion of her brother could only improve if he came clean – though she was most definitely going to smack him upside the head a few times and yell a bit before coming around.

“This is me being extremely relaxed Will, now if you want to see a not-so-chill version of me, you just keep up that attitude and we'll get there in no time.”

His eyes darted toward Chris, begging for help but the latter simply raised his hands and said, “That's your mess to clean up!” He took place next to Mara on the couch and leaned his elbows on his knees before joining his hands, patiently waiting for William to start speaking.

If they let Mara do, she would be pacing around the living room like a caged lion, but instead she was tucked in a blanket.

“Listen,” she started, first looking at Chris then shifting her gaze back to William. “I'm sitting on the couch, wrapped in a blanket, surrounded by pillows. I couldn't even hurt myself if I tried and I'm feeling fine, you can't use my health as an excuse not to tell me. So now you sit down, and spill your guts before I lose my cool.”

In a rather mechanical movement, William sat down on the couch facing Mara and Chris. They weren't touching in any way, they weren't looking at each other, yet he could sense how close they were – they moved according to each other, their body language spoke volumes right now. They were like two magnets and he felt dumb for never noticing before – unless it was new? There was no way to know now.

Mara really wasn't as threatening as she would have liked to be at the moment, wrapped in her blanket like a burrito. Nevertheless, her fiery glare finished to convince William that Chris was right: she was beyond pissed, and he needed to talk – now. Chris was infinitely grateful not to be on the receiving end of Mara's death glare – for once. Her patience had clearly worn out somewhere between the first time she asked her brother to explain himself and the hundredth time.

“I don't even know where to start,” William eventually said, gulping down thickly.

“The beginning,” Mara said in a click of her tongue as she crossed her arms over her chest.

“Then I should probably start with an apology. I owe you both one, especially to you Chris,” William said and turned to his friend. “When I told Mara that none of my friends were good enough for her, I didn't mean it in a malicious way, I only wanted to keep her from getting hurt but it was shitty nonetheless. I'm sorry. And I'm sorry-” he continued, turning to Mara again. “-for my reaction when you told me you were dating. I realize it was exaggerated but it came as such a shock, it was a serious blow to the trust I placed in you both. I'm not saying it was justified, I just want you to know why I reacted the way I did. I understand why you kept it from me, even if I don't like it. Again, I'm sorry.”

“Thank you,” Mara said with a nod, gracefully accepting the apology but not answering with the usual “it's okay”, because it wasn't.

“I didn't only come to this conclusion yesterday though. As soon as I realized you had sneaked out through your window and left with Chris I knew I had fucked up. Very badly.”

Chris snorted and looked away. He leaned back against the couch and it drew Mara's attention to him. Whatever he wanted to say he must have swallowed back because he remained quiet and silently enjoined Will to resume.

“If you had taken your phone with you, I think this whole thing would have turned out differently, but since I had no way to contact you apart from directly going to Chris' place, I decided to give you time to calm down and the next morning, I had an idea. An idea which involved not speaking to either of you for a while,” William finished and waited for a reaction.

“That doesn't make sense,” Mara scoffed, bringing her curled fingers to her mouth in a thoughtful position. “What made you change you mind? Had an epiphany in your dreams?” She asked in a conceited tone.

“I didn't even sleep at all during that night. I was so mad, at you two yeah, but mostly at those bastards the Yakuza. It was all my fault, I knew it before you even told me. The bottle I smashed on of my the guys' head was the reason for my little sister and my best friend to get beaten up, it was unacceptable. They wanted me, and they kind of hit exactly where it hurt most: they attacked the two people I care most about to reach me.”

“Still doesn't explain anything,” Mara snapped at him, growing impatience.

Chris' hand came to rest on her forearm and it seemed to be enough to make her simmer down a bit and stop being so harsh toward her brother. It was stupendous how they interacted. Mara quickly uncrossed her arms and laced her fingers with his before William continued his explaining, hardly managing to detach his eyes from their joined hands.

“I thought – and I know now it was a flawed strategy – that if they thought you weren't in y good graces anymore, then there wouldn't be any reason for them to hurt you again until I found a solution.”

“Now you're just stretching it out to create suspense,” Mara said, rolling her eyes. “Spit it out, Will. You told Chris, right? Then why can't you simply tell me. Be concise.”

“You asked for the whole story, stop being so impatient!” He protested.

The two siblings smiled a little at that, as though they had missed their playful banter.

“I push you away because I wanted it to become public. I needed everyone to know – to _think_ – that I turned my back on you. It was the quickest and easiest way I found to make sure you would be spared from whatever shit storm was coming. I planned a fight with the Yakuza to settle our issues once and for good, I was hoping they'd became over confident since they thought I was upset because I just lost my two best friends, I wanted to use it at our advantage. I know I was harsh on you, but I thought it was for the best, I couldn't have either of you involved in this, not after what happened at your date.”

“Your plan didn't even work and you ended up dragging Chris into a fight he wasn't ready for, was it worth letting us think you never wanted to have anything to do with us anymore?” Mara asked, biting her tongue to not say something she would regret. He was so fucking stupid, how could they even be related? A few weeks ago she never would have thought her brother capable of such a thoughtless decision. “You could have told us. We could have played along if that was what you wanted, but instead you made everything a mess!”

“I was still mad okay?!” Will snapped. “I wanted you safe, but I still felt betrayed and I didn't exactly feel obliged to share this with you after what I had just discovered about you two.”

“You were still mad, that you're excuse? Is that why you dragged Chris in the second fight? Because you were mad?” Mara almost spat out, squeezing tight on Chris' hand to help her calm down.

“I'm fine now, there's no need to discuss this fight anymore,” Chris tried to interject to make them both settle down a bit. “I forced his hand, I refused to give way and leave when he not so subtly told me to fuck off.”

“I was rude because I needed you to be pissed enough to leave,” Will sighed as though he had already explained this a thousand times and was tired of saying it. “But you and your obstinate mind got in the way of my plan. If I knew you were still hurt from last week I never would have carried it out, but you seemed fine until-” William paused and Mara finished for him.

“Until he wasn't.”

“Yeah. Until he wasn't. I told Elias to get you home and make sure you were okay, at least until Mara came back.”

“The harm was done I think,” Chris replied. “And he didn't stay, he just dropped me off and waited until I was inside to drive away.”

“I'm sorry for what happened, man,” Will apologized once more. “I knew something was wrong, especially when neither of you showed up at school the next day, but when I tried to call you to explain-”

The rest of the sentence was left unsaid but they all knew what happened then. Mara and Chris dived their head in the sand and ignored William's persistent calls or texts, Mara even went as far as to punch him when he eventually gave up on trying to reach them on their phone and showed up on their doorstep.

“I was so worried but at least Noora had some good news to give me. Since when are you friends?” Will suddenly asked Mara.

She shrugged and pouted.

“Not long,” she said. “She's nice, we hit it off at school.”

A fond smile replaced William's stern expression at that.

“It was horrible to lie to her,” he told her. “But I knew she would react the same way as you and call me dumb before demanding I get my shit straight and talk to you, so I didn't tell her my plan. She was genuinely trying to make things better between us whenever she told me about how she saw you that day and you told her about Chris and you and she thought it was endearing. I had the hardest time keeping it together.”

“Good,” Chris and Mara said at the same time and smiled at each other.

“Why were you arguing with Chris yesterday? You just said you realized your mistake after the fight, then why argue again as soon as we come back to school?” Mara questioned, obviously determined not to leave any unanswered questions.

“That's my fault,” Chris said to her utmost surprise. He looked at their joined hands and only met her insistent stare after a few seconds. “William was trying to explain all of this to me, and I completely flipped and it escalated quickly. It's my fault if you-”

“-don't even say it,” she cut him off. “It was nobody's fault, it was a deadly combination of exhaustion and stress that led to this.”

And certainly not Chris. He had stood by her no matter what during the last months, whether it be before or after William found out – could it be only ten days ago? - he put up with her shit and more, he loved her for it.

“William,” Mara then called his name and focused back on him. “You tell Noora the truth.”

“I will,” he promised, raising his right hand.

“And no more keeping things from us on the ground that it's for our own good,” she added.”It was fucking stupid.”

At some point, she had crossed her arms again, as if she needed to physically manifest how mad she was through a defiant stance accompanied by a hard stare. William had seen her eyes shift to Chris several times throughout his explanation. It's not like she could help it, she wanted to see his reaction too – a little part of her was scared that Will's revelations might upset Chris and that they would be back to square one, all mad at each other. But he didn't budge. There was no reaction to gauge because he was expressionless. It was the same story William must have served him the day before after all, but he was still impressively impassible. Actually, it didn't even seem like he was listening to his friend, he eyes were trained either ahead of him or on Mara in this unsettling and intense manner.

“You're a goddamn cretin, William,” Mara declared. “There are so many different ways you could have handled this!”

“That's more or less what I told him yesterday,” Chris said, agreeing with her and chuckling faintly.

“I know I am,” William admitted. “I didn't mean any harm though, it- it all got out of my control real quick and I was in too deep to turn around. The fight happened and I knew I had to tell you everything but you wouldn't listen – understandably so-”

“You should have told us.” Chris shook his head. “Mara's right, we would have agreed to play along, we could have pretended to fight, but this- this,” he stammered and Mara came to his rescue when the words wouldn't come out anymore.

“This was a catastrophe! I'm never letting you make plans on your own again, and once you tell Noora I'm sure she'll agree with me,” Mara laughed bitterly.

“Listen, I know it was a complete failure. But believe me, I thought about other way to deal with this, and my conclusion was that I couldn't both be honest and keep you safe so I made a choice – a bad one, I get it now, but a conscious choice. It wasn't my most brilliant idea but if there was a chance of you not being involved in this whole thing, I had to take it. If I had told you what I had in mind, there would have been no way for me to keep Chris out of the second fight, you know it.”

Mara brought her lips into a thin line and Chris guiltily stared at the floor.

“The priority was to make sure you were far away if things went downhill,” William concluded.

“It went downhill anyway,” Chris felt the need to point out. “I never thought I'd experience the expression 'beaten to a pulp'.”

“You're not helping bro,” William whined.

“I'm not supposed to help you man, I'm the one you're apologizing to too. Mara looks fine as hell, but I'm still wearing a flippin' black eye and a gash, I look like Scarface in the not cool sense of it.”

“I know, I know, I'm sorry,” William said yet again.

“Alright, alright, I think there's been plenty of apologizing today. All this woke up my damn headache,” Mara suddenly said. “But just so you know, we're far from even. I'll make you regret this for the rest of your life, big brother,” she warned William. “And from now on, I'm officially the decision maker of the Magnusson household.”

“I second that,” Chris laughed.

“That's not fair, you're biased!” Will complained. “Give me a break, it's the first time I fuck up this bad.”

“Last year you forgot to pay the water bill and it cut off while I was in the shower,” Mara said. “And once, you thought it would be cool to surprise mom with a kitten for her birthday, and then it turned out she was allerg-”

“Okay, I get it, you make decisions from now on,” he grumbled and leaned back in the couch.

“Oh wait a sec',” Chris said. “I never heard that shower story before, I want to know what happened next!”

“She mostly screamed at me until I went out to buy water bottles so she could rinse out,” William snickered at the memory. “It only happened _once_!” He argued when he saw Mara squint her eyes at him.

“Rest assured that from now on if I need anything while I'm in the shower, I'll call Chris.”

She smirked as she told him that and while Chris' expression mirrored hers; William only made a face between utter disgust and fondness and stood up, pretending to be grossed out and leaving them alone for a little while so they could process all the information he dumped on them.

“That’s bit too much to take in all at once,” Mara said as soon as she was alone with Chris.

“Once you reach rock bottom you can only climb up,” Chris philosophized and smiled. “At least now we’re good with William.”

“He’s still a dick and I’ll get back to him,” she scoffed. “I’m tired, I think I’ll take a nap. You two should go back to class, it’s almost noon and you can’t keep this up or you’ll get expelled.”

“I’m not leav-“

“I’ll be fine, Chris. I’ll stay here and sleep, nothing’ll happen to me,” Mara promised. “We’ll see each other tomorrow at school.”

“I don’t care if I get kicked out, I’m not leaving your vicinity until I’m sure you’re fine,” Chris objected, his stance shifting to a more defensive one. “You can’t make me go.”

“I can’t, but he can,” Mara replied, pointing toward the far end of the room.

Sure enough Chris’ eyes fell on William, standing cross legged and leaning against the wall, his backpack already swung over his shoulder in a casual manner.

“He can try,” Chris challenged William, leaning back in the couch and crossing his arms on his chest.

His brows flew up, as if he were waiting for Will to make a move and physically drag him away from his sister and out the door. Mara wanted to roll her eyes – she seemed to be doing that a lot more lately – when she saw Chris’ stance. He was sitting in this typically manly fashion, taking more room than necessary on the couch with his spread legs and looking pissed at William for siding with her.

“C’mon,” Mara said and stood up, offering her hand to Chris. “Don’t be a grump, now.”

“I’ll wait by the car,” William told them before exiting.

“It’s my car and you can _walk_ , man, I’m not driving you!” Chris shouted after him, though he was already out of earshot.

He tore his eyes from the closed door and focused back on Mara whose hands she placed against his chest, effectively making him calm down. But Chris simply frowned and looked down at her.

“Don’t give me that look,” he said. Mara’s doe eyes remained trained on him, knowing exactly what she was doing. “Mara-“ Chris continued with a warning tone, merely causing the small smile on her face to stretch a bit. “This is manipulation.”

“Is it working?” She asked, gently running her hands up his chest to his shoulders, pretending to be smoothing out the folds of his sweater.

A sound between a groan and a sigh fell from his lips and he visibly relaxed under her touch. She tried not to give in to the triumphant smile that threatening to split her face in two. Her hands once again moved up to his neck before cupping his face in her palms.

“It’s weird to have you back here, the house’ll feel empty,” he blurted out, puzzling her. “I guess we’ll have to go back to not sharing a bed every night and living apart. It’s just weird,” he repeated, as if it was a fact he had trouble coming to terms with.

They had never planned on making it last anyway, but now that things slowly returned to what they used to be, they found themselves sad to part, no matter how short the separation.

“Getting all sappy on me?” Mara teased him.

“If you tell anyone I’ll deny it,” he dead panned. “How long is it acceptable to make William wait in the street?” He wondered out loud.

The young Magnusson giggled and stood on her tiptoes to gently place her lips against his, finally enjoying the little moment of intimacy they were allowed today. She pulled back just long enough to say, “I think he can wait two more minutes.” Chris smirked against her skin and captured her lips again, eagerly returning the kiss, as though he had been starved of her for far too long a time and he was now determined to make up for it – even if it meant leaving William to wait in the cold.

 

 


	20. Chapter 20

All eyes were on Mara the very moment she climbed out of William's car the next morning. The rumor that she passed out had spread around as quickly as wildfire but she couldn't be bothered by the constant whispering she heard on her way to her locker. Being the center of the general attention was something she was used to and at ease with, regardless of the reason behind it.

Besides, there was really only one person she felt like giving her attention to this morning, and it was none of those gossips that talked in a hushed tone as soon as she entered a room. She endured the two first classes without saying a word apart from answering the teachers' questions. When someone said hi to her, she smiled and nodded friendly but her lips were sealed. She simply wasn't in the mood. Her night was shorter than what she would have liked, her brother even more sorry than what she thought and Chris even more worried.

She had told William that she would forgive him completely eventually – if he made efforts and bought her enough sushis from her favorite restaurant. As for her lack of sleep, there wasn't much she could do apart from taking a nap after class today.

That left her with Chris. He must have ran late this morning because she didn't see him come to school and when she had glanced at William from across the schoolyard, he had shaken his head, silently telling her he hadn't seen Chris either. Mara was growing wary when she still didn't see him after her first classes, but she was kept busy by Noora and her friends. They were all so enthusiastic upon seeing her well and coming back to school that the young Magnusson was almost rendered speechless.

“It's good to see you well!” Eva said with a giant smile and stars in her eyes.

“Maybe you're not eating properly,” Vilde suggested, setting her worried eyes on Mara like she feared she would pass out again any time.

Mara put a reassuring hand on her shoulder and told her she ate more than enough food for a munchkin like herself. It put a smile on all their faces and she felt like it was a small victory.

“William told me what he did this morning,” Noora sighed, looking absolutely done with her boyfriend's shit. “I'm so sorry, if I'd known about this I would have tried to change his mind.”

“It's not your fault.” Mara shrugged a shoulder and brushed an unruly strand of hair behind her ear. “Have you seen Chris?”

“No, sorry,” Noora said with an apologetic pout.

“Oh, I saw him!” Eva interjected, her eyes lighting up. “He mixed up his classrooms this morning and accidentally barged in in the middle of my English class. He looked pretty upset, but I don't know if it's due to him walking in the wrong class or something else,” she said sheepishly.

It must have shown on Mara's face that she was uneasy about not finding Chris today.

“I'm sure you'll find him,” Vilde said as she grabbed Mara's hand for support. “He must be with the boys or still in class.”

It was a long shot, but at least she tried to ease Mara. She smiled despite the bad feeling stirring in her gut.

“We were about to hold a Kosegruppa meeting, do you want to join us to take your mind off of him?” Vilde offered graciously, looking at Mara with wide hopeful eyes.

When she saw her expression, Noora stepped in and answered for Mara.

“I'm sure she'd rather find him now,” Noora told Vilde. “You girls start the meeting without me and I'll meet you after helping Mara.”

Before any of the girls could object, Noora grabbed Mara by the arm and dragged her away, making her stumble on her feet when she pulled her with her. The urgency with which Noora pulled her forward seemed out of place given the situation, and it triggered a number of alarms in Mara's head. She shivered despite the thick knitted sweater she was wearing. It was Chris' favorite, the one that hung off her left shoulder.

“What is it you're not telling me?” Mara finally asked Noora, stopping dead in her tracks to get an answer. “Do you know where he is?”

“No, but I know why he seemed upset this morning,” she said, almost embarrassingly, looking down instead of meeting Mara's eyes, even though Noora wasn't one to shy away from an intense stare – she did date William after all.

Mara added two and two rather quickly and she was storming past poor Noora in a split second, her wild brown hair looking like a wildfire around her head. She hurried down the hallway, people stepped out of her way as though they could feel her aura of fury and when she burst through the front double doors, Mara's eyes immediately set on the person she was looking for.

Iben was exactly where she always was: sitting by the large tree at the school's front gate, with her group of friends, among which some Mara considered her friends too – or at the very least, people she got along well and saw almost on a daily basis in class. When the girl saw Mara coming, she paled and swallowed thickly. She stood up – a vain attempt to keep the upcoming argument private and not get put back in her place in front of her whole group of friends – but Mara was quicker than her and circled around the small gathering of people before grabbing Iben's wrist. She wasn't going easy on her and tightened the grip.

“What are you doing?” She shouted, shocked that the younger Magnusson sibling would resort to force.

“You should have listened to Eva,” Mara spat, thinking about how Eva tried to talk Iben out of her nonsensical plan to win back Chris, telling her that it would ruin a friendship instead of restoring a relationship.

“What are you talking about?” Iben barked at Mara, faking not to know why she was being attacked like this. But her voice betrayed her and Mara saw right through her false self-assurance and harsh tone.

“I'm not going to say it twice, Iben: _you leave him alone_. You had your chance with Chris and you missed it, but if you think for so much as one second that I'm letting you ruin _my_ chance, you're dead wrong. I'll fight for you,” she concluded, not deeming it necessary to specify that she meant it literally and figuratively.

Her tone was final and her grip on Iben's arm so tight her knuckles were white. Iben didn't answer – to be perfectly honest, she looked a more scared than ashamed of her behavior. There was nothing more Mara could do at this point, she wanted to make it clear that she would not bend and break, this was a war she was willing to fight. Iben should know this, she should know that no sane person would play dirty with a Magnusson.

It was clear by the way Iben's eyes watered up that Mara only told her a truth she already knew and suddenly, she felt more pitiful than angry. Mara let go of her and after glaring at her and everyone around one last time, she turned around and walked straight towards the Penetrators, hands dived in her pockets and eyes clouded by her anger. It wasn't everyday that Mara Magnusson had to defend what was hers – and Chris _was hers_ – from the envious eyes of jealous girls, but when she did, she made sure to instill the fear of God in them. And what was an underlying threat if not empty when it wasn't accompanied by physical evidence of her being serious?

To Mara's utmost relief, she finally saw Chris, hidden behind the group of boys. He was sitting on the table, his feet on the bench looking deep in thought. Elbows on his knees and hands joined under his chin, he seemed troubled by something.

“Chris!” Mara called his name and he looked up.

All the boys froze like they were scared Mara would direct her anger at one of them if they made an abrupt movement. But she wasn't mad at Chris. William walked between her and the picnic table, coming out of nowhere and stopping her in her tracks.

“What is it?” She asked with a frown.

“It wasn't his fault, I swear. You know I wouldn't defend him if he did you wrong, but Iben really kissed him by surprise and-”

Mara walked around William and by the time she reached the boys, Chris was on his two feet and met her halfway.

“Mara, it's not wh-” He started but never got to finish the sentence.

Mara grabbed him by the neck and kissed him in front of everybody – the whole school was watching by now, after her little stunt with Iben and her storming past everyone she had attracted a fair amount of unwanted attention. The boys around them cheered and applauded. There were even some “fucking finally” and “not to soon” among the loud excited shouts. Chris' hand mingled in Mara's hair and wrapped around her middle as he answer her possessive kiss. It was a statement, a mark of ownership. They were both aware of it and of their audience, but it didn't undermine the pleasure they took in doing it.

Noora had finally caught up with Mara and was now standing behind William. When Mara grabbed Chris, he grumbled “I can't watch this” and Noora covered his eyes with her hands to spare him the show.

“They are cute together,” she commented, though she didn't expect William to agree.

“Still won't watch my best friend suck off my sister's face,” he replied. “But yeah.”

“I, for one, ship it,” she giggled before withdrawing her hands when the two lovebirds parted.

She squealed when William turned around and attacked her neck with little kisses, making her giggle harder and taking her heed off of his sister.

Mara and Chris didn't pay attention to any of this.

“You're not mad? What's the catch?”Chris asked almost immediately after they broke the kiss.

There was no catch, there was no explanation to ask for or apologies to give. From the moment she realized Iben had something to do with Chris' avoiding her and looking upset, Mara knew that the girl was at fault. She knew Iben, she thought of her as a friend to some extend – though not anymore – and if Chris was at fault for cheating on her, she was no angel either and she herself had stolen Chris from another girl, so why would she hesitate to do it again? Mara trusted Chris, she knew – and she held it for truth – that he would never do this to her.

“No,” she chuckled. “Just, don't try to avoid me if anything like this happens again.”

“You're one hell of a girl Mara,” he said, biting his lip and shooting her a heated glance before kissing her again.

“Is she still looking?” Mara whispered. Chris darted his eyes toward Iben and her friends.

“I think she's crying now,” he said with a wince.

Mara should probably feel sorry for her, but she didn't. She had kissed her Chris, she could stick it. For a little while they stayed like this, standing aside from the Penetrators, holding each other as if they would die from lack of contact and had to touch in some way. Chris' sneaky hands slid beneath her sweater and massaged her hip and the skin of her lower stomach, making her press herself against him – in as subtle a way she could since it was a pretty public display of affection. But soon, it was time to go.

“I have to go back to class,” Mara said regretfully. “Anything planned for tonight?” She inquired.

“Have something in mind?” Chris asked flirtatiously, leaning in and giving a swift and superficial bite to her naked shoulder.

“I might,” she replied with a mischievous smile that Chris realized he was the only receptacle of.

He like that. The thought of being that special, the thought of eliciting reactions from her that no one else could trigger. He had to summon a ridiculous amount of self-control to merely take his hands off of her, and he didn't even want to think about the sharp coldness he felt when her body detached from his. Geez, could he be any more smitten with this girl?

“I'll finish a bit later than you, but you can go to the apartment with Will and I'll meet you there, yeah?” She suggested, placing a tentative hand over his collarbone and gently stroking it. She used the same hand to push away from him and walk away after seeing him nod, speechless.

Mara looped her arm around Noora's and the two girls walked away, glancing over their shoulder to watch theirs boys as their made their way back to class, and when they finally crossed the front door of the building, Will sighed. He strutted toward Chris and with a defeated yet delighted look on his face he said “man, we're so whipped.”

And if Chris weren't too busy thinking about Mara, her playful eyes, her teasing smile, her silly laugh and the way her hips swayed as she walked away, he could have given a damn. Expect he didn't, because she was too extraordinary for him to care about being whipped or not.

“It's a bad thing?” Chris asked, genuinely not knowing anything anymore at this point.

“No,” William laughed. “It's just that I never thought I'd see you like this.”

“Like what?” Chris scoffed, shooting him a challenging look.

William didn't open his mouth, but the answer was so evident that it floated in the air around them, and even Chris couldn't deny it anymore. _In love_.

“If you hurt her though, I can promise you endless torture an major bodily harm that you may or may not recover from,” William added for good measure.

“Yeah, yeah, I know,” Chris laughed and shrugged his jacket on. “Let's go now, we're always late.”

At the other side of Nissen, where Noora and Mara parted ways to go to their respective classes, the girls chatted animatedly about the next party they planned for Kosegruppa and tried to convince Isak to host it.

Mara took Noora apart and asked in a hushed tone, “huh, Noora, could you do something for me?”

 


	21. Chapter 21

“No date tonight?” Chris asked, plopping down on a bench next to William. His friend was busy _not looking_ at Noora, and failing.

“Nothing planned so far,” Will answered, finally detaching his gaze from his unofficial girlfriend – even though everybody knew already – and looking at Chris. He couldn't wait for his black eye to fade away so he could finally turn the page and move on from the hectic last few weeks. “Why are you asking?”

“Because I do.” He shrugged in an attempt to look relaxed but he was a bit tense. “Mara asked me to come over tonight, I was hoping to get rid of you,” Christoffer joked – he was dead serious though.

William was not amused and huffed in exasperation.

“I'm not leaving you alone with my sister in my apartment so you can christian every room,” he groaned.

“Seriously, bro?” Chris complained, frowning and throwing his head back when William gave him a stern look. “Not cool.”

It wasn't the first time William cock-blocked Chris but most of the time he did it because he found Chris fooling around in his bed during a party, not because he wanted to protect a girl's honour. It itched Chris to tell him that Mara's honour was gone since she was fourteen but he kept to himself because Will probably didn't know that. There are certain things a girl doesn't tell her big brother.

“I'll be there the whole time, looming over you guys and coughing whenever it gets too steamy,” he snickered but his smile vanished when he heard Chris grumble something along the lines of 'you might as well start coughing now'.

“Shut up!” William exclaimed, bringing a leg up on the bench.

“What? It's true! If you know your sister at all, you shoul-”

“She usually doesn't bring the guys she sleeps with home,” William cut him off. “But I guess I'll have to get used to it, you sound- serious about her.”

Serious was a massive understatement but that William didn't need to hear – Chris bet it was obvious. From a single look toward Mara, his eyes gave away how hexed he was. And he wasn't even complaining! Same goes for William – if not a little more, his eyes were practically glued to Noora, he looked at her like she was his sun and stars. Chris hoped he didn't look that dumb when he caught Mara smiling at him randomly during the day, otherwise he would never hear the end of it

from the boys.

“You're not the boy she sleeps with though,” William continued. “You're the idiot she loves. Which sounds even worse said out loud.” He winced as if the words stung.

“I don't think you're supposed to tell me that, Mara has yet to say the words,”, Chris laughed at the 'oh shit' face that William made. “It's fine, I won't say anything.”

“Cool, cool-” Will nodded. “You know I'm just messing with you, right?” He then asked, staring a little harder at Chris. “I'm happy if you're happy. Both of you.”

“You don't look too miserable yourself,” Chris said, gesturing toward the group of girls where Noora was laughing at something girl Chris said. “You sure you don't want to take the girl on a date tonight?”

“Quit trying to set me on a date to be alone with Mara!” William rolled his eyes and Chris began to laugh wholeheartedly, catching the attention of the girls.

 

*

 

Three hours into the evening, William was regretting his decision of not going out with Noora and staying at the apartment to chaperone the two idiots currently cuddling on the couch. When he saw them slowly dozing off and falling asleep in front of the TV, he began to wonder why he denied himself a little fun tonight. What came over him? What did he care anyway? Those two have been humping like bunnies for months, he was sure of it, what does it change that he knows it now? Did he ruin both their and his night? God, he needed a drink.

“Cheers to me and my brilliant ideas,” Will grumbled and took a sip of beer.

Mara was right, he was a shit decision maker. There he stood, in the living room's door frame, watching Chris and Mara sleeping soundlessly, their features free of tension as though everything was best in the best of worlds. The bottle of beer almost slipped from his hand when he heard a knock on the door.

He didn't think he could get any more confused but when he opened the door and found Noora standing there, all dressed up and smiling, he did indeed, become more confused.

“Noora?” He asked with a smile. That's all he seemed to do whenever she was around – her very existence was enough to make him smile, especially when she was all dolled up and sheepishly stepped inside the apartment.

“Hi, is it a wrong time?” She asked, although he was obviously not up to much. “Oh! Are you sleeping?” She lowered her tone when she saw Mara huddled against Chris on the couch, their eyes closed.

“It's a perfect time,” William exclaimed in a whisper. “It was getting a little boring to pace around in silence.”

“I came to see if you wanted to go out, Eskild bailed on me for a tinder date, so-” Noora stretched the last syllable, waiting for William to get the hint and ask her to hang out.

“Yeah- yeah sure, we can go anywhere you want! I wanted to ask you out actually but- I don't know, I have no excuse, let's just go and I'll make it up to you,” William rambled as he set his beer on the coffee table and grabbed his jacket from the coat hanger.

“Don't you want to say goodby-” Noora began to ask when William grabbed her arm to lead her out.

“No, let them be, at least when they're asleep they can't get in trouble.”

Oh boy, if only he knew how wrong he was. As soon as William closed the door before them and locked it, Chris opened an eye to make sure they left.

“They are gone,” he whispered, for good measure. “Not too fucking soon!” He exclaimed after a few more seconds and stretched his tired limbs once Mara lifted her head from his shoulder.

“I was going to fall asleep for real, Noora really took her time.”

Mara yawed and mimicked Chris' action. Then she pulled her phone out of her pocket and texted a quick 'thank you so much I owe you one' to Noora. Chris kicked off the blanket that was covering them both and grabbed William's half finished beer on the table.

“Isn't sharing a beer a bit like kissing someone?” Mara teased him as she laid down, resting her head on the armrest and throwing her legs over Chris' lap.

“Wouldn't be the first time,” he answered with a wink before downing the rest of the drink.

“Oh god,” Mara whined, covering her eyes with hers hand. “I didn't need to know that, nor did I want to!”

“Serves you right for making dumb jokes!”

Chris put away the bottle and leaned forward until his face hovered over Mara's and he pulled away her hands to look at her.

“C'mon, don't hide your face from me,” he demanded gently. “You've been drooling on my shoulder for the past thirty minutes, I think I deserve a reward.”

His tone conveyed the smirk on his face and even if he looked at her like he was the hunter and she was the prey, Mara knew she had him wrapped around her finger. She brushed back his rebellious hair with her hand then slipped it behind his neck only to pulled him down and kiss him. Their lips met in an open mouthed kiss tainted with a bit of roughness due to their frustration after waiting three hours for Will to leave.

“I waited just as long as you, why don't I deserve a reward?” Mara asked when Chris pulled back a second, merely to change positions and climb between her legs.

He could feel her welcoming his weigh on top of her, the way her thigh clutched his hips and her legs wrapped around him – there was no better feeling in the world to him. With one hand each side of her head, Chris looked down at her, watched her smile and bite her lip, wondering if she knew what she was doing to him when she looked at him this way. He licked his lips and leaned down again, pressing his forehead against hers.

“Why are you looking at me like you're about to eat me up?” Mara asked playfully, rubbing her foot up and down the back of his leg.

“Because I am,” he growled, rolling his hips to earn a low moan. When Mara's swallowed lips parted, Chris took the opportunity to kiss her again, as if he wanted to absorb all the little sounds she emitted. “That's your reward – and mine too.”

“Promise?” She ushered, barely mustering up the words while being assaulted by Chris' lips, on his lips, on her neck, down her throat and lower, _lower_.

There was no point in answering when Chris could simply show her that he meant it. Slowly, very slowly, he rid her of her clothes one by one until she lied naked on the couch – oops. And soon, the quiet room was filled with short breathed gasps and heated moans while Chris' head was buried between her thighs, and Mara's hand pulled at his hair.

 

*

“It's not too late to go out,” Mara muttered, her voice showing more tiredness than she would have liked.

Chris' body kept her warm and his arm around her waist weighed heavy enough to make her feel safe and protected. Mara's bed provided them with much more comfort than the leather couch and that's where they ended up after getting (a little) naughty on Will's precious couch.

“Now?” He groaned in her ear, nuzzling her neck. “You'll have to give me a damn good reason to get me out of bed after this.”

He still didn't open his eyes when he felt her turn around in his arms and started kissing his chest up to his collarbones.

“I love you,” Mara said, and Chris froze. As soon as she felt him tense up she stopped kissing him and looked up, and placed one last kiss on the corner of his lips before looking at him. “How is that for a damn good reason?”

“I have nothing to say to that,” Chris admitted a couple minutes of silence later.

A smile etched his features now that he finally heard those words come out of her mouth and for him. Not because she wanted to prove something to William. Not because William was rambling about how he would have to deal with seeing Chris hanging around at their place more often.

“Nothing at all?” She insisted, pouting a little and smiling knowingly.

It wasn't that she absolutely needed to hear him say it back – because she already knew Chris reciprocated her feelings and Mara was never one to be so dense as to need people to spell things out for her - she could read between the lines just fine. But Chris – Chris was another thing – he looked like the words were on the tip on his tongue, waiting to be said.

“Maybe a few things, four actually,” he said with a shrug.

“You've had plenty of time to think them through since the hospital when you eavesdropped my conversation with William.”

Mara grinned mischievously and stole another kiss from Chris. She was an agile thief and Chris a consenting victim.

“I love you too,” he finally said and buried his nose in the crook of her neck to pepper kisses here and there and leave a very visible love bite as if to draw a final point to his statement.

Mara's crystal clear laughter echoed through the empty apartment and at this exact moment she was especially glad William wasn't in their vicinity and they didn't need to stifle their laugh and be quiet.

“Still wanna go out now?” He asked, pressing his lips to hers again.

“Of course, I'm famished and I want a waffle,” Mara declared causing a wide smile to stretch her boyfriend's lips.

“I expect you don't have a waffle maker?” He sighed, already pulling off the blanket.

“You know Will and I live off of take out food,” she huffed. “Now come, let's get out of here and prove my brother that asleep or not, we always cause trouble!”

“Well said, Mara! Let's get crazy and go down town to eat waffles in the middle of the night,” Chris teased her.

They had to go back to the living room to pick up their clothes and as soon as they were ready, they left arm-in-arm for a night trip to the local H24 diner to have some waffles because the lady requested some. Despite his little experience with serious relationship – or total lack there of – Chris knew that the secret to a long lifespan was to not stand between a woman and food.

“Do you think he'll panic if he sees we've disappeared?” Mara asked once they were in the street. The cold wind did wonders to refresh them after their activities. “I'd pay good money to see his face!”

“Are you punishing him for being a dick to you?” Chris laughed.

“Me? I would _never_ ,” Mara pretended to be offended by the sheer thought.

The familiar crinkles appeared at the corner of Chris' eyes and Mara felt her heart swell in her chest to the point where it hurt her ribcage. With a strange sort of pride, Chris wrapped his arm over Mara's shoulders and let her hug his side as they walked through the streets of Olso, void of people and lulled in a pleasing quiet darkness. The lights of the late closing restaurants illuminated the city, but nothing shone brighter than the spark in their eyes – as freaking cliché as it sounded – because right now it didn't matter that it was half past midnight and below zero degrees, or that they were tired and hungry, because they were still the happiest of all people.

“Do you think we've switched roles?” She wondered out loud as they finally stepped through the door of the restaurant. The familiar jingle of the front door greeted them when they sat down near the window.

“What? With who?” Chris frowned, confused. It wasn't always easy following Mara's train of thought.

“ _Noorehlm_ ,” she said with sarcasm dripping from her voice as she used the made up ship name she used to refer to Will and Noora. “A few months ago we were complaining about them eye fucking and being love sick puppies – which was true – and now I feel like we're no better.”

“Do you want a real answer to this?” Chris huffed playfully, both his eyebrows shooting up. His left hand distractedly played with the menu and Mara's foot rhythmically tapped on the tiled floor.

“Is it a pleasant one?” She inquired.

He leaned back on his chair without ever taking his eyes off of her. The corner of his mouth twitched slightly upwards and he had to look down to his lap to suppress the smile growing on his features.

“No clues, do you want to hear it or not?”

“Fine, tell me how pathetically in love we are, I can handle it,” Mara told him.

“We'll never be like Will and Noora. First off, we're much better looking – I mean look at us-” Chris began immediately beaming with pride upon hearing Mara's laugh. “-and also because I'm sure no one can claim to understand what we went through just to be here tonight, together, eating waffles with extra whipped cream, let alone pretend they lived the same experience.”

“How many people can claim to have been beaten up as many times as we did, right?” Mara asked, agreeing with his reasoning.

The waitress set their waffles on the table and the two of them dug in the second the walked away as though they hadn't seen any food in days. Chris and his extra syrup and Mara and her extra whipped cream really were the dream team.

“It was brilliant to ask Noora to lure Will away by the way,” he said, using the last piece of waffle as a sponge because he didn't wan to waste any drop of syrup. Chris had a sweet tooth, that she knew.

“It was our joker,” Mara replied. “Next time he'll have to suck it up or wear earplugs!”

“Or we can go to my house. I still have a few rooms we haven't tried out, and I- shit, get down! Get down!”

Mara dived under the table no questions asked.

“What's going on?” She asked in panic.

They attracted the attention of the waitress but Mara quickly told her it was nothing and she shrugged and went back to work, like it was nothing new to have customer hide under a table.

“William and Noora just walked past the restaurant,” Chris whispered.

There was no reason to whisper, but it was a reflex. Just like diving under a table when there was no longer any reason for them to hide from anyone.

“That's it? You scared me, Chris!” Mara shoved him in the shoulder. “I thought freaking Terminator was coming fot us!”

“Sorry, power of habit,” he apologized and sat down on the floor, not really bothered by their position. “Mara, did you- did you take your waffle?”

As she licked away the whipped cream from her lips, Mara said, “Excuse me but I have my priorities sorted out.”

“I can see that, yeah,” he laughed. “Mind sharing?”

“Ugh? Yes!” Mara replied, moving her waffle out of Chris' reach. “Order another one!”

“Or I can just eat it off your lips since you have whipped cream everywhere,” Chris said and connected their lips to illustrate.

She smiled in the kiss, and gasped when Chris used his hand to pull her closer, regardless of the lack of room to navigate. They deepened the kiss as much as politeness allowed and finished the rest of Mara's waffle before crawling out from under the table.

They took place on their respective seats and gave an apologetic glance to the waitress – Chris also gestured her to bring them two more waffles – but she barely acknowledged them, she was looking at something else, outside.

“What's- _oh my god_!” Mara shouted when she turned toward the window to look at what the waitress seemed to be staring at and met the judgemental gazes of her brother and her friend. Her hand flew to her chest and her heartbeat went into a frenzy as soon as she saw William's scolding expression and Noora's amused one.

“They can't be serious!” Chris groaned and looked away. “Well, so much for sneaking out. Might as well order more waffles.”

Mara smiled at the two of them and gestured them to come inside for a late night snack. A double date – _now_ they reached a new low of silly pathetic romanticism.

 

*

 

The usual hustle animated the school at lunch break. It was now warm enough to eat outside, and the Penetrators occupied the central table. From the moment things went back to normal between the two Magnussons and Christoffer, it was like the entire school became more joyful – it became a merrier place. Conversations flowed easily, laughter erupted from the other tables and all trace of tension left the atmosphere.

Chris sat one leg each side of the bench to face his friend Maksim, who couldn't stop asking him questions about Mara, as though he couldn't ask her directly. She hung out with them often enough, yet they all waited for her not to be around to try and get juicy information out of Chris. Most of it was sex-related and a bit gross. It was the kind of questions Chris didn't mind answering when he didn't care about the girl, but he mostly shrugged when someone came up to ask him what Mara was like in bed. What answer were they expecting anyway? Even if he responded, it would be something along the lines of 'she's fucking fantastic' and that would be it.

Nevertheless, he had to give them credit for trying. It was the closest they would ever get to receive answers to their questions if Chris had a saying in it.

“Do you think it makes a difference that she's Will's sister?” Maksim asked him without even looking up from his fries, distractedly shoving one after the other in his mouth.

“A difference from what?” Chris sighed, finishing his coke and playing with the empty bottle, flipping it around in his hand.

“The other girls. What makes her so special that you went monogamous from one day to the next? Magic pussy or what?”

“You know what? That's exactly it, Maks, Mara has a magic pussy,” Chris said in slight annoyance. His patience was wearing a bit thin and sarcasm fell out of his mouth before he could think about it.

“It glows in the dark,” Mara whispered in Maskim's ear from behind him, effectively startling him and making him drop the fry in his hand.

Chris snickered mockingly as his friend literally made a little jump from the surprise of having Mara creepily whisper in his ear. Chris had seen her walking over there but didn't say anything, and he was glad he kept quiet. Mara giggled satisfyingly and sat down between the two boys, her back to the table.

“Talking about me I see, what else were you saying?” She inquired after putting her bag on the ground and stealing one of Maksim's fries.

Chris bit his lip and raised an eyebrow at Maksim as if to tell him 'go ahead man, you started this, you tell her'. Mara felt the familiar warmth of Chris' palm on her thigh. Since they were at school she knew he would behave and leave it there, just for the comfort of making direct contact, but his hand was a lot sneakier than that most of the time.

“I just asked Chris what made you so special to him,” Maksim ingenuously answered, in order to put Mara's attention back on her boyfriend.

But she didn't budge and continued to look at him as though Chris weren't even there, though she could feel his hand on her and hear him chuckle on her left.

“You don't think I'm special?” Mara asked Maksim with a smile, causing a blush to appear on his cheeks as though she had asked a tricky question. “Ouch!” She faked to be hurt by that.

“That's not what I meant- of course you're special, I mean you're William's sister-” he awkwardly stammered, the blush on his face deepening.

“If the only thing that makes me special is my brother Chris would be dating him,” Mara pointed out, earning an uncomfortable chuckle from the boy she was currently dragging and a teasing stroke of the hand from Chris.

“You're digging your own grave man,” Chris laughed at how red he was by now.

“Thanks but I don't need you to tell me,” Maksim replied, squinting his eyes at his friend. “I mean- you've _got to be_ some very special snowflake if you can deal with _this_ ,” he eventually told Mara, pointing to Chris' general direction with his chin. “Full offence dude,” he snickered and flipped Chris.

“He's pretty al right,” Mara shrugged and moved her eyes back on Chris, who tried to conceal his smile. “You'd be surprised,” she added to Maksim's intention.

He was more than al right and a thousand times a better person and boyfriend than all the other guys Mara has met in her life. But that wasn't anyone's concern but theirs. Most people bought the Chris' act of the emotionally unavailable player and notorious fuckboy – which he was in a sense, but not fundamentally – and as long as it didn't come in the way of their relationship, they didn't see the need to prove people wrong.

“Nah,” Maksim shook his head and decided she must be messing with him because everybody knew _Chris was the worst_ , he wasn't _boyfriend material_. “Wait 'til you find out his flaws, the dude's not even half as fun and easy going as he tries to play it off- aouch!” He yelped in pain when Chris kicked him under the bench, but Mara didn't pay any mind to what he said.

“Trust me, I know Chris' flaws. I know exactly what I'm getting into,” she mindlessly answered while leaning in closer to Chris.

He grinned and met her halfway to kiss her. It remained general audience rated despite the force they put into it, and the underlying eagerness for more than just a chaste little kiss. But when did they ever feel content with a mere kiss? Chris and Mara were both uncharacteristically intense people; God help them they could never get enough of each other. Except that social conventions required that they broke the kiss after a few seconds. With one hand nestled on her waist and the other one on the back on her neck to press her lips against his one last time before they pulled apart, Chris thought that Maksim wasn't completely wrong – she _was_ special.

“Oh no, you stop this, you stop it right now!” Maksim said a good ten seconds after they stopped kissing, making them both frown.

“We're not doing anything,” Mara said in a confused tone, almost like it was a question.

“Don't play innocent,” he warned her, though it seemed that it was directed at the both of them. “I've seen porn that wasn't even half as steamy as the way you look at each other. It's gross, and nobody should have to see this first hand like I am.”

“Shut up and close your eyes if you don't enjoy the show,” Chris scoffed.

He and Mara leaned in for yet another kiss in a synchronized movement, as if they both of them had had the same idea at the same time. When their lips met, it triggered another round of protest from their friend, who stood up to give them some privacy and spare himself the show he was subjected to.

That truly summed up their whole relationship. They knew each other like the back of their hand; they didn't need to check to know that they were on the same page. It was instinctive, completely engraved in their being, in who they were, and without saying a word they just _knew,_ they _felt_ _it_ in their guts, in their bones, and in their heart that their feelings were shared.

 


	22. Epilogue

_A few years later..._

 

Mara continuously tried to grab the salt from Chris' hand while he kept adding some to the vegetables but he raised the hand holding the salt jar too high for her to reach it. He laughed when he heard her use her threatening voice and call his name as she gave him _the look_.

“Stop adding salt!” She pestered him but it served only to make him smile wider as he watched her struggle to try and grab the salt – and fail.

“I'm the cook and I say it needs more salt,” he replied, stepping closer to her only to look at her from under his nose as if he were a great chef whose authority no one could contest.

He motioned to add another sprinkle of salt when Mara literally threw herself at him and grabbed his arm to stop him.

“It'll be too salty, Chris!” She argued, miserably failing at her attempt to keep him from reaching the jar of salt.

Even with their arms entangled and Mara's constant screaming, Chris managed to do as he pleased. He was smirking in victory and momentarily lowered his guard – it was enough for Mara to ceased the opportunity and confiscate the salt once and for good.

“Ha! Ha!” She exclaimed, holding her trophy against her chest so it would be safe from Chris' light fingers.

“Get out of my kitchen you vertically challenged thief!” Chris told her, chasing her off and he grabbed a napkin and threw it over his shoulder.

He was still much more skilled in the cooking field than Mara, although she tried her best and often helped him – even if she suspected he enjoyed his role of chef and only assigned her simple tasks which never allowed her to actually improve. With a twirl and a laughter Mara left him to his task – with the salt – and Chris had to repress a somewhat annoyed but fond sigh.

She didn't go farther than the other side of the kitchen island, where William sat and rolled his eyes at his sister and his best friend's antics. He felt like he was intruding but at the same time he wanted to be included a little more.

“Stop it, you guys!” He told them. “I didn't come all the way here from London to watch you go all domestic on me,” he said with a dramatic tone.

Chris ignored him – or maybe he simply didn't hear over the sound of the stove and the food cooking – and Mara merely shot him an innocent smile and took place on the seat beside his, leaning on the counter and letting her hand hang from the edge. William's eyes automatically switched to the eye catching ring on his sister's finger, like every time it caught the light, and was once again reminded of the fact that she was married to this dumbass over there.

“Why did you come then, brother?” Mara asked him, nudging him playfully. She set the salt down on the counter and chuckled, “certainly not for Chris' salty cooking.”

“I heard that!” Chris shouted. “And it's not too salty, it's perfect salty.”

“You're doing it again!” William cut them off before Mara could answer something silly and endearing, because he still couldn't wrap his head around the fact that his little sister was married to Penetrator Chris. He sort of got used to it, but it still blew his mind away.

“Says the one who looks at Noora like she's the sun and stars of your world!” Mara replied, poking Will's arm. “I know you think nobody notices when you gaze at her in awe, but we do.”

“So what? At least I keep quiet, you two are horribly keen on PDAs, it's like Senior year all over again,” he said in disgust, even letting a shiver run through his body.

“Shut up, or I'll take your beer,” Mara warned him and William, although he seemed unimpressed, brought his drink slightly closer to him.

“If you do that I'll go grab the Tequila – we already have the salt,” William shot back but still lifted the beer to his mouth.

It was the only beer left because Chris had invited his friends over this week to watch a game on TV, and they drank all of their alcohol. And he forgot to buy more, which meant they were left with one beer, and various kinds of strong alcohols – but Mara was nowhere near pouring them a glass of vodka on Christmas Eve before dinner. If the others wanted to make the most of the night and get hammered afterwards while singing vulgar versions of Christmas songs then so be it, but not before dessert.

“When is Noora's plane supposed to land?” Mara inquired, moving the conversation to a safer subject. “Should we pick her up?”

“She said she'd take a taxi,” he said. He didn't like the idea, it was written all over his face. “She should be there soon,” he declared after taking a look at his wrist watch and frowning.

He was so protective of her, Chris often teased him for it then asked Mara to slap some sense into him if he ever turned into an overprotective mother bear with her. Most of the time she snorted and reminded him that it was needless to tell her because chances were she would do it with or without his permission.

“Glaring at your watch won't make her come quicker,” she reminded him, laughing silently. “She's a big girl.”

“She's twenty minutes late,” he stated flatly, apparently not in the mood for jokes anymore now that he noticed how late it was.

“It's Christmas Eve, she probably had some trouble finding a taxi, 'is all,” Chris said when he walked round the island to grab the salt from under Mara's nose and squeeze her waist in the process. She gestured to her eyes then to his to show him she was watching him and his abusive use of salt but smiled thankfully for his intervention.

His word always weighted a lot in the decisions William was taking. Whether it be professional or personal, ever since the huge fight they had when Mara and Chris told him they were dating – it felt like a lifetime ago – they made it their priority to never hide anything important from each other again and asked for one another's opinion all the time.

Mara felt a little discriminated against since she was concerned too and was still left out of this tacit deal – though she still applied it with Chris. William on the other hand, had taken his distance since he moved away, and even if the two siblings were tight and loved each other, it wasn't the same as when they were foolish teenagers living together and throwing parties like no one else – no one but Chris, that is.

“Will, relax, I can see the vein on your forehead throb,” Mara pointed out with a faint wince and William finished his beer. “Well I hope you enjoyed it.”

He hummed in response and pulled out his phone to check if Noora sent him a text he might have missed. A soft knock on the door sufficed to make the tension leave his features and William jumped off the kitchen stool so abruptly he almost knocked his empty bottle of beer down. Mara caught it right before it fell, out of sheer reflex and when she looked up, ready to throw the bottle at Will's face, she met Chris' stunned expression as he was giving her an impressed little smirk.

“Ninja,” Mara said, placing it back on the counter. “He needs to chill, he's tight as a string!”

“Let it go Mara, you know how he is when it comes to Noora,” Chris told her with a shrug. “Come help me while he greets her, it'll probably take a while-”

“-especially if they decide to hide in the closet to make out,” she finished his sentence for him and they laughed at the expense of their friends, referring to the early stage of their relationship when they tried to hide it from everyone – besides Mara and Chris who were let in on the secret.

“Do we have a closet in the hallway?” He asked in a much too serious tone for someone who's been living here his entire life.

“Yes we do, Chris!” Mara said, her brows shooting up. “You are way too used to having a housekeeper.”

He shrugged but didn't say anything, what was there to say anyway? He really was a spoiled brat, he knew that, she knew that, everybody knew that.

“Will you call me stupid if I tell you I like it when you say 'we'?” She asked out of the blue. “I don't even know why I'm asking, of course you'll make fun of me.”

“It's so corny, Mara,” Chris joked. Mara leaned against him before helping him finish dinner as they kept talking. “You realize we're married right? Like, I'm your husband of two years, haven't you gotten used to the 'we' thing?”

“I just love to be reminded,” she said dreamily, though a little grossed out by her own lameness. She couldn't help herself.

“Contrary to William,” Chris coughed out, just in case his friend was within earshot. “His left eyebrow twitching every time he looks at your hand.”

“Oh my god, are you serious? I'll make sure to play with my glass during dinner, I need to see this for myself,” Mara giggled while stirring the pot of vegetable.

The conversation fell silent for the next couple minutes. There wasn't much left to do, the meat was in the oven, the sauce ready, the veggies cooking, the salad on the table and Chris' hands had nothing to do except grab Mara by the waist and pull her away from the stove and right into his arms. A breathy yelp tumbled from her lips when she felt herself being pulled from the middle and she dropped the wooden spoon seconds before her back hit Chris' chest. She felt his breath brush against her ear and his hands move up and down her body, from her navel to her plexus, making her melt in his embrace.

“Now's not the time to have wandering hands, that's for later,” she reminded him, biting on her lip and turning around to wrap her hands around his neck.

She always played with the hair on his neck and Chris had to admit it was the little things like this that drove him crazy about her. Mara also hadn't stopped biting her lip and if she genuinely wanted to make him stop touching her, she should cut it too.

“How many meals do you think we burnt because we somehow end up having sex instead of eating like normal people?” He wondered out loud. “Also, how boring are other people's lives if they have dinner instead of sex?”

“I stopped counting, and I'll think about this philosophical question later because today we can't afford to burn the food.”

“Did somebody say _food_?” Noora asked in excitement as she finally walked in, William following her shortly.

“Noora!” Mara exclaimed and rushed toward her friend to hug her. It had been so long since the last time they saw each other in real life.

Skype calls simply didn't do the trick when you missed your best friend. She hadn't changed one bit apart from her new haircut – she still wore that dark red lipstick Mara adored and her fingers immediately reached for her short hair. Noora made a funny face and shrugged, having no good reason to give her for this change in style. Mara's hair grew longer on the other hand, and though it was the at the very bottom of the list of reasons that made her grow it out, she knew Chris loved it too much for her to cut it.

Without taking her left arm off Mara, Noora used the right one to reach into her bag and pulled out a bottle of wine.

“I'm sorry for being a little late, but I didn't want to come empty-handed and alcohol is not authorized in planes. And even if it was I wouldn't have had the time, I almost missed my flight because my boss kept me at work longer than I expected!” She explained.

Mara smiled and took the bottle of her hand.

“You're perfect,” she said, smacking a kiss on her cheek. “Look Chris, _someone_ thought about buying wine,” Mara said, giving a pointed look to her smirking husband.

“Did I miss something?” Noora asked and William leaned in to whisper in her ear.

“Only two hours of nonsensical banter,” he told her, making her laugh.

“William!” She slapped his shoulder. “I wanna hear it!”

“I threw an improvised party this week and forgot to refill our stock of beer... and wine,” Chris admitted with a guilty look on his face. “And Mara-” he emphasized her name and once again reached out for her, letting his hand dance on her shoulder and play with her hair “-hasn't stopped reminding me since this morning.”

This year Christmas Eve was on a Sunday, and all the stores were closed. This too she had made sure to remind him a good hundred times. Chris made it difficult for her to stay mad at him though, he knew an infinite amount of tricks to tame her quick temper and she was sad to say that she was easily manipulated when he did stuff like play with her hair, touch her thigh and constantly hold her against him. He was insanely good at avoiding conflict, he had wriggled his way out of crazy situations thanks so his sweet talking and charming smile.

Mara was usually immune to it, but sometimes he caught he in a weak moment and she gave in. Noora saw her inner conflict when Chris mentioned his forgetting, and she hardly managed to bite back her grin when Mara pursed her lips and gently bumped her hip against Chris' as a gesture of peace making.

“Don't you have a secret wine cellar full of expensive vintage wines?” Noora asked to tease him further.

“If there is one I don't know where it is, my parents never mentioned it,” Chris sighed. “Which was... probably wise.”

“Probably yeah,” they all said at the same time.

“It's a little late to search for a secret lever to a potential wine cellar at this point,” Mara continued. “We've already started packing and we're slowly moving into the apartment.”

Most of Chris' childhood house was empty now, except for their room, the basic stuff they needed to live, and the kitchen. They didn't need to furniture, everything would be left as it is and they would finally move to a place of their own and leave the house of Chris' parents. For a long time he struggled with the idea of leaving, but they left tied down here, and it was a constant reminder of the fact that his mum was unreachable and his dad too busy with work to even make it to their wedding. Schistad father made a quick appearance to give his best wishes and was on the phone no sooner than they thanked him.

Now all Chris wanted to do was move on and not look over his shoulder ever again. As it turned out, his side of the church was far from empty, it was filled to the brim with his friends and the former Penetrators who wildly cheered when they saw him wearing a suit and tie.

Mara's parents weren't really present either – though they did show up at their only daughter's wedding, and did pay for the whole ceremony. William now worked with their father in London, and Mara sometimes got a random phone call of her mum, telling her of her adventures and the new friends she made during her travels. She mostly talked about herself and rarely asked Mara how she was doing, and almost never bothered to ask her about Chris. But then again, she didn't really care about maintaining some sort of bond anymore. Mara and Chris were both adults now, and they came to terms with the idea that they would never have a picture perfect family. They had the financial stability they provided, and they had freedom because none of them gave a damn about their children it seemed.

“At fifteen we were making fake IDs to buy booze and at twenty-six we drink coke at a party,” William said as he pulled out four glasses, and Mara took the coke out of the fridge.

“I think I'll drink to that: a well spent youth we made the most of!” Noora proposed a toast and raised her glass of coca cola with a straight, solemn face, like they weren't cheering with soda.

Without questioning it for a second, they all mirrored Noora and raised their glass as they cheered and drank together. Noora and Mara caught up while eating pretzels and laughed quietly, meanwhile the boys had their own conversation and downed the first bottle of coke as if it were liquor. The girls tried to fill the other in about all the things they have missed during the months they haven't seen each other.

Noora finally got the job she dreamed of and became a journalist, which was great because it kept her busy and allowed her to travel so she wouldn't be waiting home while William worked late hours – they both tried to balance work and personal life. Sometimes it felt like they were neglecting one another because they spent so little time at their shared apartment, but they loved each other to pieces and the absence made their time together all the more precious. Noora cherished it, as much as she loved her job, she loved William more and if he ever needed her to be present, she would be – and everyone knew it worked the other way around as well.

Mara couldn't place a word on the feeling, but she felt something between pure shock and utter bewilderment at the thought that these two hadn't made things official. Among the Penetrators – she couldn't help it, she still thought of them as the Penetrators, even if the group of friends didn't call themselves that anymore – there used to be a bet going on, the boys bet on who would get married first, and only two bet on Chris.

Mara didn't even bet on Chris – she genuinely didn't see it coming, and to be perfectly honest it still felt surreal sometimes. It was nothing spectacular, not a grandiose proposal with a lyrical love declaration – it wasn't anything special per se. One day Chris came home with a funny look in his eyes and he was in his thoughts for most of the night, to the point where it frustrated Mara because she was talking to an unresponsive Chris – might as well be talking to a brick wall – and suddenly he blurted out – completely out of the blue – that he loved her. Now Mara wasn't easily endeared and he knew that it wasn't enough to make her forget that he spaced out during their conversation throughout the whole evening but then-

Then he grabbed her hand and told her to get up, and they grabbed their jackets on Chris' demand. It was late already, too late for them to go out during the week when they had to go to work the next day, but fatigue was kept at bay by the curious restlessness that took them over. Before she knew it, Mara realized Chris had led them at the diner where they once ate waffles at in the middle of the night. She laughed and they talked for over an hour while order waffle after waffle and suddenly he just said 'marry me'. He sounded a bit tired now, and excited, and impatient – the words in themselves sounded like one of those crazy ideas you get when you stay up way past your bedtime and you can't think straight anymore. This could have been a disastrous idea, the worst ever; it could be rushed, and he might regret it in the morning when the sun and his common sense are back in the picture. But the same restlessness that brought them here was still in the air. Chris was smiling – for a second time froze and Mara saw everything she loved about him: the crinkles at the corner of his eyes when he smiled genuinely, the fact that his hair fell in front of his face at the end of the end, the way he looked at her, the way he loved her.

Chris was crazy, but so was she. Mara couldn't think any straighter than him; she said yes, yes, yes.

The first time Noora heard this story she cooed every two minutes and listened intently, her head resting in her palms, her eyes filled with stars – Mara rolled her eyes at her and told her to chill because there was nothing to say about this, it wasn't very romantic, it was just them.

Even today Noora mentioned it sometimes, Mara didn't know if she did it merely to push her buttons or because she wasn't over it either. Chris Schistad tied the knot before all of his friends, and if that wasn't a good example of character development then Mara wasn't a Magnusson.

Well, she wasn't anymore on the paper, only at heart.

“Mara,” Chris called her while Noora laughed at something Mara said.

The two girls stopped talking and Mara looked over her shoulder right when Chris' hand came to squeeze it. Contact. Constant contact. It wasn't a reflex, nor was it a habit. It was a necessity. Chris became restless and unease when he kept his hands off her for too long. Mara grew fidgety and unfocused if she couldn't touch him. They were addicts.

He didn't add anything after gaining her attention, but Mara followed his eyes and she saw the clock.

“Alright, time for dinner!” She announced, clapping her hands and hopping off her stool. “Will, you set the table while Chris and I take care of the food,” she gave her instruction like she was born to give orders – which wasn't a far-fetched idea at all, and also a little bit of professional deformation.

“What?” She asked, raising his hands. “I'm a guest!”

“No dude,” Mara said sarcastically. “Noora's a guest, you're just my brother.”

Chris muffle a laughter and Noora didn't even bother to try and hide hers. William grumbled something but went to grab the plates anyway.

“Oh, I'll help you William,” Noora said as she joined him and took everyone's glasses. Soon they were out of the kitchen and in the living room to set the table.

No sooner they left than Chris placed a hand on Mara's waist and pulled her toward him. She gasped at the gesture, not expecting it, and crashed against his chest, finding him smirking down at her – she knew that smirk, it was his mischievous smirk.

“What is it? Why are you smiling like that?” She asked.

“For nothing.” He shrugged but the smile was still there. “I'm just... in a good mood, I guess?”

Happy. The word he was looking for is happy.

“Christmas spirit and all that shit?” Mara stuck her tongue out and laughed at her own words.

“Maybe.” He shrugged again, remaining vague. Mara frowned a bit but kept quiet since she wasn't going to complain about Chris' pleasant state of mind.

He didn't give a flying f- about Christmas, he cared about the woman in his arms. The sexiest wife on earth, the cheekiest life-partner he could have dreamed of, the equally insufferable little brat who share his life.

His fingers curled around the tender flesh of her hips; his lips brushed against her cheekbone when he leaned in and gently teased her before kissing her. Chris constantly flirted with his own wife – some people found it silly or even pointless, but he never took her for granted and liked to know that he could drive her crazy anytime.

Mara melted in his arms whenever Chris did that. The fact that he kept seducing her, every day, all the time, it was sweet, it was hot. She pressed herself up against him as though she wanted to merge their bodies, and wrapped her arms around his neck t bring him even closer to her if it was only possible. Their kiss deepened quickly; as their breaths mingled the became intoxicated by one another. The separation was all too abrupt.

“To be continued,” Chris said when he pulled away; he punctuated the sentence with a final chaste kiss. “You naughty,” he called her and booped the tip of her nose and he smirked wider and winked.

Mara had to bite back a comment and reminded herself she had her whole life ahead of her to get back at him for booping her nose. A smile rivalling his spread her face and in a common gesture, they went to grab the food and carry it to the living room.

Once the food was on the table conversation came easily and everybody roared with laughter and told stories and ate and drank. Chris fetched the single bottle of wine in the fridge and began to pour some to Noora and William who were too caught up in a conversation to even notice. Chris went to pour some in Mara's glass but she placed her hand over her glass.

“What?” Chris asked in a high pitched exclamation. “You can't be serious, you've been nagging me all day about not having any wine!” He said in a chuckle. “C'mon, have some, there's enough for all of us and William can't even drink too much because he's gotta drive tonight.”

He motioned again to pour her wine, but Mara replaced her hand on top of it and shook her head firmly.

“No Chris. It was for them-” she explained, making a little head movement to designate Will and Noora who were still paying to attention to their surroundings or their hosts. “I'm not drinking.”

It sounded rather final, and Chris' brown shot up in a confused frown. His hand was still raised mid-air, holding the bottle of white wine. He placed it down, accepting that Mara wasn't going to drink any. He was beginning to wonder if she wasn't feeling sick when he spotted the sheepish little smile on her lips, and the way she bit down on them.

“No-” Chris said, in disbelief when he finally added two and two together. “You can't- no-” he repeated, shaking his head. “Mara?” He asked for confirmation, a growing smile making a featuring appearance on his face. He almost cracked with joy and was suddenly a bit scared of her answer.

“I'm not sure yet, but- yes,” she admitted.

“Yeah?” Chris asked again – no way this was real; it couldn't be happening, his body couldn't contain that much joy he was going to burst.

“Yeah,” she whispered.

The whole exchange had been quick and discrete – the couple sitting across them had no idea what just unfolded before their oblivious eyes and it was fine this way. Mara moved her chair slightly closer to Chris, and he placed a hand on her leg while doing a terrible job at not grinning from ear to ear.

“Hey,” Mara hummed to get his attention. Frankly he wasn't sure he could give anyone his full attention anymore tonight, at least not until he got over the shock of it all. “I promised that you'd never spend another Christmas alone, right?”

“Well, you sure don't fuck around with your promises, do you?” He snickered, tightening his grip on her.

“A Magnusson always-”she started but Chris cut her off.

“Are you seriously going to use a Game of Thrones line on me right now?” Chris huffed. “Also, you're hurting my feelings you know? You're a Schistad now.”

Were it in any other context, Mara would have rolled her eyes at his being dramatic and said something about her going from being the hottest Magusson to the hottest Schistad and start bickering back and forth with Chris – there was never any winner to their pointless arguments, they just liked teasing each other and taking it to bed.

“I meant it, Chris. I still do.” Her tone was solemn. Chris fondly pinched her chin and Mara licked her lips and looked down – she hated that this made her blush.

When she looked up Chris mouth three little words that only made her cheeks redden a shade darker. Then they both realized it was oddly silent, and when Chris and Mara tore their eyes away from each other, they saw Noora and William staring at them like two emotional parents, both proud and a little grossed out by the moment of intimacy they witnessed.

 


End file.
